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Newspaper
Washburn Times
Location
Washburn, Wisconsin, United States of America
Date
Dec 01, 1910
Page
6
In a column of quirky quips the Washburn Times skewers aviation fashion chaos inflated earnings and oddities. Headlines rail against dirigible vanity and balloon chauffeurs while noting oats production imports and consumer misfortunes with dry humor.
Rumor suggests Wall Street may begin sessions with prayer though officials doubt it is needed, supporters say it could offer guidance while critics question practicality.
Postal authorities in Madagascar plan mail cargo by aeroplane, while U S rural delivery via airship remains distant. A Pittsburg man regrets marriage was costlier than living single, echoed by many others. Europe endures cold, floods, and crop losses around Barcelona as weather extremes worsen globally.
The four toed horse found in Wyoming's bad lands intrigues scientists as an ancient ancestor of modern horses. Yet it is unlikely to rival the woolly horse in drawing crowds. A scientist predicts New Yorkers will live underground within 100 years, suggesting a future solution for breathable air underground.
A recent report says the crown prince of Servia desires to marry a rich American girl. After surveying Servian candidates, the prince reportedly insists the bride must be wealthy.
A Gotham era report notes a deceased county clerk alleged to have stolen public funds, illustrating a lively graft environment where embezzlement rumors persist even after death.
A ninety year old woman counsels her younger sister to swim and avoid corsets for a long life. The older generation agrees to swim or dive, but will not abandon corsets or fashion, even to reach advanced age.
Cranberries remain abundant in the United States with strong production in Massachusetts New Jersey and Wisconsin. Cape Cod plans to market up to one third of a million barrels in a season as growers embrace machines for harvesting boosting efficiency and reducing reliance on hand labor. Prices vary with bumper years yielding profits even when markets slump from 2 to 5 dollars per barrel. famine years push to ten dollars.
A historical overview traces Thanksgiving from Plymouth and 1621 celebrations to broad national observance. It notes early proclamations by Massachusetts governors, later widespread adoption, and Lincoln’s 1862 and 1863 proclamations linking the holiday to national victory and unity.
An old New England theme on Thanksgiving shows a shift from simple feasting to elaborate decorations. The piece surveys paper turkeys candy boxes pumpkin centerpieces and themed favors as centerpiece and gift ideas with chrysanthemums as preferred color accents and lifelike paper imitations of seasonal foods.
Two leading figures praise a Thanksgiving proclamation for its tone of joy and gratitude. They note the governor’s apparent strong start, with discussions of a future promotion and mention his ownership of a large state turkey farm.
The 1795 proclamation by President Washington calls for a day of public thanks and prayer. It notes relief from foreign war, quiet within the states, and the suppression of the Whisky Insurrection in Pennsylvania with federal support. John Jay’s envoy efforts are linked to frontier tensions with Britain and seizures of American ships.
M. C. Walker of 933 Grand Ave Connersville Indiana says ten years of kidney trouble nearly led to Bright's disease. After several doctors failed he took Dean's Kidney Pills and was soon relieved. Five years with no recurrence. 50 cents a box Foster Milburn Co Buffalo NY.
Four year old Lady Betty, playful and prudent, ordered poached eggs on toast at a restaurant. While peering out a window she tested the screen’s safety and asked if she would fall and get hurt, wondering what the waiter would do with the eggs if the screen gave way.
Uncle Silas Geehan jokes about easy marks and fake gold bricks while recounting a street scene seen in the city. Daddy Squash neck questions the sale and a peddler promotes artificial ice for chumps who bought it.
A humorous exchange shows Binks complaining the fast colored stripes from a dollar bathing suit rubbed off on his back. The bathing master replies with a sly promise that removing them will be harder, adding a teasing smile.
A country youth courted a city girl and was told she would be his sister. He kissed her and she called for her father. The father intervened and, by mutual consent, the brother sister relation ended.
Mr. Grouch complains turtle soup lacks flavor. Waiter replies with Shakespeare joke about names and expectations. The exchange plays on a line from Tit-Bits about not finding a ship canal in Manchester pudding.
Little Myra Lee had been in school a few days when her mother signed as Mrs Kent. The teacher asked for clarification and Myra explained that her mother remarried but she kept her original surname, a charmingly frank remark from Lippincott's.
A philanthropist urges helping others without reward and notes a practical habit of buying umbrellas instead of borrowing them, illustrating quiet public-spiritedness.
A brief exchange notes a single fitting use for a strong poker hand. The speaker asks for the exact use, then hints at aggressive investment by saying I will shovel in the money.
An Illinois woman reports shifting from coffee to Postum improved kidney and bowel action, steadied nerves, reduced despondency, and boosted physical and mental stamina. She says she can now perform hard mental work with less fatigue and plans to read The Road to Wellville.
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