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Newspaper
Warren Mail
Location
Warren, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Date
Jul 05, 1900
Page
4
A late 19th to early 20th century column from Warren Pennsylvania gathers quips and jokes on marriage, work, reform, and everyday life. It cites Roosevelt, a postal rule, and a farmer’s barn lettering tale while sharing anecdotes about soldiers, lawyers, and relatives.
A bachelor, Petra Peterson, ponders marriage and a move as Jeannie Cope and her mother view his house. Jeannie offers a matching plan to live with him, while Peterson imagines furnishing choices and a future domestic life with blue decor and canary birds. A youthful nephew named Joe appears, adding to family dynamics.
A Franklin Pennsylvania tale recounts William Barber who served in Company F Sixteenth Regiment during the Spanish American War. While en route to Chickamauga he sent a note on a piece of hard tack asking for a square meal. The daughter of Col Ray received it, and later Barber visited the Chickamauga camp. He then married Col Rays daughter and moved to Tennessee. The narrative shifts to John Gorrie, emigrating to New Zealand with his collie Gala. Facing quarantine and legal hurdles, Gorrie ultimately sacrifices Gala to avoid separation, throwing her overboard in Port Chalmers. Gala’s body is later found ashore, highlighting the tension between frontier loyalty and bureaucratic enforcement.
A Pittsburgh News report quotes a Magazine street wholesaler arguing amanuensis use harms orthography and that stenographer reliance erodes spelling skill. He says long practice with dictation keeps spelling sharp, warns memory becomes rusty without writing, and notes medieval reliance on scribes.
A lunatic at Wellesley asylum produced about a dozen creations during ten years, including a ship anchor that can never foul its chain and works reliably. He never studied ships but drafted diagrams and models, later patented, sold for a total of around $10,000, and shared half with his two sane daughters. He also created a corkscrew and a folding chair.
In a light exchange during a visit in England President Kruger learns the Duke of Abercorn is a longtime member of the British lower house. The duke boasts his lineage, but Kruger retorts that his father was only a shepherd, implying a modest background despite apparent status.
The Chicago Tribune prints a remark attributed to Weyler saying he regrets not handling Cuban post offices as well as he could. The brief quotation frames a rare moment of self-critique about administrative duties.
The Boston Herald notes an appropriation to buy five Holland torpedo boats signaling that submarine warfare may be starting in earnest. The remark implies a looming shift in naval strategy and technology.
A New York Sun excerpt describes shop clerks offering stretched shoes to customers. The tactic aims to remove fitting discomfort by having staff wear and break in shoes, potentially boosting sales as patrons buy more often. The piece notes stores in several towns already use this method and predicts wider adoption.
Practical advice on storage methods for vegetables. Keep beets, parsnips, carrots, and potatoes on damp stones covered with a damp cloth. Store beetroot and other roots in sand. Tie onions in bunches and hang them up to prevent spoilage.
A letter to the Boston mayor offering $1000 for a good position identified the writer as an honest appearing elderly man who claimed officials gain appointments by such payments.
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