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Newspaper
Warren Ledger
Location
Warren, Pennsylvania, United States of America
Date
May 25, 1888
Page
4
A collage of witty quips and humorous snippets from a bygone era. Jokes touch on manners, betting, weddings, and everyday quirks. The items reference doggerel, punchlines about insurance, peevish printers, and social foibles with brisk, newspaper-card zest.
Central police display a pasteload bus with mutilated greenbacks from a 25 000 roll stolen by a pickpocket on a train. Chief Speers describes a tiny rounded steel knife used to slit pockets, noting it is made for the profession and cuts cloth swiftly.
In Warriors Mark Township Pennsylvania a pair of barn martins built a nest under a barn eave with a hollow for entry and exit. A sparrow seized the completed nest and refused to yield. The sparrows owners sealed the hole with mud. The martins rebuilt a second nest nearby and continued to occupy it.
The excerpt argues word counts vary by ability and role. It asserts educated speakers know 600 to 7000 more words beyond basic vocabulary, while common people use 300 to 1000 words, and illiterate individuals may rely on 1590 to 2500 words. It labels those with small vocabularies as ignoramuses and notes difficulty expressing thoughts without sufficient words.
The peach has ancient roots in China with references 2000 years before Greece and 1000 years before Sanskrit lands. The cultivated group includes common peach hectarine and three other Chinese varieties. It arrived in Italy at the start of the Christian era. The almond is not a peach species, being native to Syria.
Lindsey Muse, an elderly Navy Department clerk, has stood at the Secretary of the Navy's door since 1828. Now nearly eighty, he grew frail after a cold settled into paralysis, forcing him to retire from duty ten days ago and unlikely to return. Westington Letter.
A Petaluma resident while exploring Mendocino county witnessed a dramatic encounter between a large eagle and a coyote both clinging to a live hare. The eagle tried to rise with the prey while the coyote pulled it back, sparking a ferocious battle of feathers and fur. The observer fired a pistol at them. the eagle flew away and the coyote retreated.
An advertisement from a Buffalo soap manufacturing firm offers subscribers a 30 day trial of a family and toilet assortment, with a chance to receive a Teach case and numerous premiums. The appeal emphasizes value and gifts for trial participation, urging readers to mail their address. A second note mentions Prince Bismarck and a health tonic pattern of ads.
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