Pupil Names Grate Painter Joke Hits Class
A teacher tests pupils on famous painters Michael Angelo Raphael and Salvator. Jimmie, missing the day, blurts My father as the answer, and the class laughs when told his father paints grates and ironwork.
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Newspaper
Vernal Express
Location
Vernal, Utah, United States of America
Date
Nov 27, 1908
Page
3
A teacher tests pupils on famous painters Michael Angelo Raphael and Salvator. Jimmie, missing the day, blurts My father as the answer, and the class laughs when told his father paints grates and ironwork.
A young oculist in Warsaw hires a blind beggar to display a light board with his name, address, and hours by the Church of the Holy Cross. The busy street draws attention and benevolent ladies sometimes contribute coins, though patient numbers are not yet known to rise.
Hiram Bingham arrived from Honolulu aboard the Alameda and is praised as a leading figure in Gilbert Islands missions. His decades of work began in 1857 amid a culture with no writing or paper, where a misdelivered mail was eaten as if it were white man’s food.
A Newark News item touts a magical tomato as a gateway to childhood summers. Imagery paints a farm scene with trumpet vines and hollyhocks, and a kitchen voice sternly guarding the tomatoes as the scent of mint and ripe fruit fills the air.
Mr Mildew recalls entering a barn where Gwilks was hanging prompting him to flee for the police. Henry recalls Mildew did not cut him down because he believed the man wasn’t dead.
A humorous courtroom moment recalls Rufus Choate as a great lawyer prodding a witness about absent mindedness. The witness stumbles in a joking reply, describing a man who thinks he left his watch and checks his pocket to see if he hid time, calling him a little absent minded.
A fragmentary item notes a man born of wordlsts facing a harsh fate amid references to pathogenic germs and a Courier-Jourzel styled claim. The readability is limited but hints at a historical-era biographical or social mention involving language hobbyists and disease concerns.
The Washington Post notes historical claims about who set Moscow ablaze during Napoleon's invasion. New evidence from Countess Lydia Rostopchine supports the original charge against Count Theodore Rostopchine, blaming him for ordering the fire, with family letters and a sealed will tied to the mystery revealed a century after his marriage.
The editor of the Children’s Cyclopedia invites young readers to send questions for explanation. Sample inquiries range from Adam’s color to where spirits go at sleep, and why time never stops, with other puzzles about cats tails fleas and hens’ eggs.
In a humorous vignette Mrs Tribbles forgets the scripture after a moth distracts her at church. She explains that she swatted with a handkerchief, but the moment caused her to lose the preached text, leaving Mr Tribbles puzzled by the mislaid memory. The exchange preserves light domestic humor and mid century tone.
government scientists describe using a chronoscope to measure projectile velocity at 16 points before exit. at lower speeds the projectile triggered steel marks, but at 2500 feet per second or more the triggers gouged grooves, necessitating a different device.
An old man inspects a cheap book of flute music offered by a seller. He tunes his flute, plays through tunes from the book for an hour, and comments that he has only liked half of the selections so far.
A Cherbourg market clash saw fishwives halt sales after police inspectors fined sellers for minor infractions. Women blocked the market, bids ceased, and fishermen withdrew their catches, leaving Cherbourg's 75,000 residents without fish until authorities removed the inspector and restored order.
In a Sorrento hotel a group of American tourists discuss I Maiton Crawford known as a prolific writer. Tales of his speed and volume circulate as they nickname the author and a tall Chicagoan claims to have read all Crawford books.
A survey of veteran postmen celebrates extraordinary long-distance foot travel. Lincolnshire’s Joseph Hunt reportedly logged about 240000 miles, while George Thompson of Lanchester area carried 1250600 miles over 26 years. Orme M Brown traced 11000 miles as postmaster, John Simmonds 181000 miles over 40 years, and Thomas Phipps totals 440600 miles from 1840 to 1893 across districts including Chipping Norton.
Walter J Travis at Rye relates a friend’s story about a drunk caddy and a butler. He notes how those with responsibility may drink, recounting a lady discovering her butler drunk before a dinner. The butler jokes it isn’t catching.
A farmer mocks city dwellers as a trio of Chicago girls move onto a nearby farm. Mrs Jack Frost separates sexes in a chicken yard causing a yard full of young roosters, fights, and piled corpses before a dawn chorus reveals the error. Also news states German royal castles Benrath and Jagerhof near Düsseldorf to be sold then Bruehl castle restoration planned by W Illy for the Kaiser.
A quotation by William Ellery Channing notes that a laboring man can carve time for self improvement through a strong purpose. By seizing spare moments, using earnings wisely, and applying industry and spirit, he accumulates knowledge from short daily study periods. Each hour dedicated yields unexpected gains in learning.
Sherlock Holmes and Watson observe sunburned vacationers on a boardwalk and assign roles from their clothing and appearance. The pair discuss a waiter, a Panama hat wearer, a cook, a stout woman, a grocer, and an actor, using exaggerated social stereotypes.
In Harper's Weekly a sorrowing older man sits in a park after learning his longtime jail home will be sold and torn down. A passerby offers aid, and the man explains he has lived there 26 years in Singing, a jail.
The article notes social improvements in farm life from telephone trolley and good roads bringing city amenities to rural areas. It argues such progress should extend nationwide and could be advanced by a commission named by President Roosevelt and tied to Wall Street Journal reporting.
A Philadelphia Bulletin excerpt notes a Chinese rodent bred for song, praised by Dr Eichelberg who spent time in a Chinese prison. He says its vocal harmonies resemble a canary and cites similarities in throat structure to a small yellow bird, including feeding style.
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