Worst Joke Contest Delivers Putrid Laughs and Banter
A reader submission from Peter Starrett leads a parade of dreadful gags and wordplay. Citizens like Carole West and Lan Mavis Armstrong contribute punchlines about Tarzan, spaghetti hair, and old Volkswagens. The tone mocks the era's humor while preserving quirky names and local addresses.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Lan Mavis Armstrong
Bisbee
Action Please: Tucson readers seek help on noise and traffic
Inquiries cover a barking dog nuisance, speed limits near El Rancho, advisory school 25 mph signs, left turn green arrows on Stone Avenue and Council Street, and lane marking at Speedway Craycroft. Officials outline steps: pursue police records for dog complaints, speeds remain 35 mph east of Country Club, Rincon signs are advisory, green arrow timing to be extended, and East Speedway resurfacing will resolve lane confusion.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Tucson
Tucson Daily Citizen
Stone Ave
Council St
Council
Stone
Speedway
Craycroft
Gerald Conniff
E. Fairmount Pi
Country Club
el Rancho
East Speedway
Craycroft East
Conservative To Succeed Kefauver
Herbert F. Walters, a conservative Democrat and self-made millionaire, named to the U.S. Senate seat of the late Estes Kefauver by Gov. Clement. Walters, 71, a Morristown native and national committeeman, has no declared ambition beyond serving Tennessee and backed the nuclear test ban and tax cuts while avoiding civil rights positions.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Nashville
Tenn
Herbert
Walters
U.S. Senate
Estes Kefauver
Clement
Harry F. Byrd
D-Va
Tennessee
Advise and Consent at Corral Theater in Tucson Tonight
A play titled Advise and Consent runs tonight at 8 30 in the Rendezvous Room at the Santa Rita Hotel Tucson. Tickets are charged for admission and the show continues through Sunday with performances tonight and tomorrow.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Corral Theater
Santa Rita Hotel
Kennedy weighs Western trip amid conservation push
President Kennedy considers a October swing into the West to review natural resources and wilderness areas while building political exposure for 1964. The plan, not settled, could take him from Grand Coulee Dam to Glen Canyon Dam with stops in Washington Utah Colorado and Arizona.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Washington
Kennedy
West
Grand Coulee Dam
Northwest
Glen Canyon Dam
Arizona
Nevada
New Mexico
California
Colorado
Idaho
Montana
Oregon
Utah
Parade Manual Details Demands for Washington March
The Aug 28 civil rights march organizers released a 12 page manual outlining aims to desegregate all schools, withholds federal funds for discriminatory programs, and demands a national minimum wage and housing protections. They expect 100000 participants and vow jobs and freedom now while downplaying violence.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York
UPI
Washington
Letter Carriers Lead Push for Tucson Dog Leash Law
Tucson letter carriers began circulating petitions to place a dog leash law on the November 5 city ballot after the City Council rejected a county request for a leash law. A city study group will meet with petitioners and a lawyer before reporting to the council. The measure would require dog licensing and vaccination, confinement or leashing within the city, and allow a city dog control agency with fees to fund the program, estimated at 105000 dollars first year.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Old Pueblo
National Association of Letter Carriers
Donald Schroeder
Donald McKerlie
Mailmen’s Leash Law Committee
McKerlie
City Workers Policy Bargain Reached After Dispute
City officials and six labor and management groups reached a tentative solution on construction projects. The plan would require bids for projects over 52,000, allow city work under 52,000 with council approval for items over 1,000, and has the City Attorney draft an ordinance. Council approved 5-1 with Councilman Reese voting no.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mark Keane
Richard Burke
Calvin Webster
William Reese
Personal Income Climbs To Record In July
Washington reports personal income rose to an annual rate of 464.3 billion in July driven by gains in construction trade and services. The July figure surpassed June by 19 billion and July 1962 by 21 billion, with dividends down slightly and factory payrolls near June levels. Individual income for January through July averaged 458 billion, about 4 percent above 1962, while farm and rental incomes did not rise. A large June dividend payment by a major auto maker largely explains the dividend dip.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Washington
Commerce Department
Barry Goldwater downplays civil rights march in Washington
Senator Barry Goldwater said the planned August civil rights march in Washington should remain orderly, controlled by intelligent and dedicated Negroes. He warned only of possible traffic tie ups and said his office would stay open during the demonstration.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Hub
Arizona
Barry Goldwater
Washington
R-Ariz
Goldwater
Republican National Committee
Marchers Choose Johnson Jr as Chief Marshal for D.C. Rally
A. Philip Randolph announced William H. Johnson Jr. will be the chief marshal for the march, with 2000 marshals to maintain order. Demonstrators assemble by 10 am at the Washington Monument, stage parades at the Lincoln Memorial at noon, rally at 2 pm, and depart the capital promptly after the one-day event.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
A. Philip Randol?ph
Brotherhood of Sleeping Car Porters
William H. Johnson Jr
New York City
Johnson
The
Guardian
Washington Monument
Lincoln Memorial
Two Boats Attacked Cuban Plant in Pinar del Rio
HAVANA UP I reports Cuba blames two armed motor boats from a mother ship for an early attack on a Santa Lucia facility in Pinar del Rio. Oil storage and sulphuric acid tanks were damaged. attackers fled under heavy machine gun fire. one boat and two Tommy guns captured. Cuba accuses the United States and certain Central American governments of complicity.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Havana
UPI
Casro
Santa Lucia
Pinar del Rio
Bazonka
Cuba
United States
Also Mentioned on This Page
Don Schellie
Maestre
Peter Starrett
Tarzan
Harry Heinbeckle
Bellevue St
Mrs. Heinbuckle
Volks Home
Carole West
Calle Cappela
Sather
Johnny
Him
Robin Lee
Ron Norton
W. Spring St
Edwin A. Busse
Winn Shackelford
W.J
Hatch
el Rancho Shopping Center
Rincon High School
Rincon
Kefauver
Wire Services
Buford Ellington
Keauver
Broad Ains
Senate
Walters Was
Leadville, Tenn
White House
Interior Department
Npo
Atbania
Georgian Tech
Wirephora
Louis Louis Armstrong
Jane Russell
Bery Davis
Connie Haines
Las Vegas
Armstrong
Fier Hhanm
Ana LG
Log
Rome
Congress
Steve Emerine
Peti
Lew Davis
Thomas Rallis
Frederick Brady
Pima County
Mary Fields
Schroeder
Burke
Pipe Trades Industry
Associated General Contractors
Electricians Union
Building Trades Unions
Landscape & Sprinkler Association
Tucson Roofing Contractors Association
Santa Rita Park
Keane
Tate
Barry