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Newspaper
Titonka Topic
Location
Titonka, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Aug 07, 1919
Page
6
Fragmentary lines show Uncle Bill Bottletop quipping about a lingering bard and Aquor availability as a token of value. The Washington Star’s remark on a living man vs a wagon of emblems appears to echo a cynical view on sentiments and flippant speech.
A historical warning explains that many mothers used paregoric and laudanum to soothe infants, but narcotics can cause sleep that never ends when overdosed. It notes pharmacists must not sell narcotics to children without labeling as poison and cautions about fake names in medicine.
A fragmentary column parodies praise and fault finding in a small town. It mocks self important talkers and a matron scolding her husband for forgetting their anniversary while a sister defends restraint and cheerfully ironic remarks about vanity and generosity.
An old advertisement extols Gold Medal Haarlem Oil Capsules as a safe gentle remedy to strengthen kidneys liver bladder and stomach. It claims 200 years of use and promises renewed vigor and health, urging readers to consult their druggist for the original imported product and offering a money back guarantee. The piece also includes a brief humorous line about a landlord and unrelated local scene.
In Youngstown Telegram a chatty misquote reflects domestic tensions as Mrs Hemmandhaw laments her husband’s cruelty while Mrs Shimmerpatee recalls Samuel’s generosity yet restraint over a hat purchase. The column mocks social gossip and notes the pill of experience often fails to satisfy.
A milk boy enters a cake shop with his can and orders water. The shopkeeper questions the water on a cold morning, but the boy explains he is paying for the cake and empties water into his milk can.
A fragment notes cities embracing a new strategic idea described as a clever path forward. The dialogue suggests an aerial route plan using a dirigible as a key element of urban logistics or display.
Mary Graham Towner presents a playful tale about the Camel Cousins and their dromedary friend. The dialogue explores wordplay with letters and a light humor about the upcoming busy season.
A playful exchange shows the Dromedary and several camels disputing how they carry riders and interpret language. Campbell Camel defends their quirky ways while the Dromedary probes how one word can change meaning and direction.
In a quirky Ottawa Evening Citizen item a teacher asks students to explain a groundhog and a child blurts an odd answer, framing a playful mixup about the animal versus sausage. The brief humorous scene highlights classroom miscommunications among four teachers and a student named Tommy.
An Ashtabula Ohio man James Lewis Saulth died leaving blueprints for a United States memorial and revealing details about Daniel Emmett the author of Dixie. Emmett wrote the Civil War era song in New York 1859 and Mount Vernon Ohio houses his grave where a monument was funded by Smith.
A veteran recalls an incident during the Cuban occupation when a sailor aimed for a flirtatious impression in Cienfuegos. While attempting to shake ashes from his trousers on a fast-moving train, the draft pulled them away, leading to a dramatic fall and a rescue by the fireman’s gear near Palmyra.
Robert, curious and scientific minded, recently visited Atlantic City with his mother. On a breezy arrival day, he stood on the boardwalk watching the sea with interest and asked his mother why the power never turns off.
Cartoon caption exchange jokes about husbands leaving business at the office and golf on the sinks. Dialogue reflects light humor on household chores and perfection.
A London theatre anecdote shows Mr. Newrich insisting on a part before funding his daughters' dramatic society. When the curtain rose, he shouted Ush in the second scene, ending the debate as the audience applauded the odd finale. An Indianapolis piece adds a humor column about wealth and appearances.
A witty quip notes that lead pencils spread germs, while stating they are used to draw them. The remark adds humor about women and small dangers, referencing hatpins as a tool women employ.
Plodding Pete and Mean dering Mike discuss the League of Nations and sympathy for idleness. The pair quip that many say people cannot be made to work, reflecting skepticism about work ethics.
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