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This newspaper page contains 19 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
The Citizen Republican
Location
Scotland, South Dakota, United States of America
Date
Dec 17, 1908
Page
7
An ad ridicules salts and castor oil as harsh laxatives and promotes Beat for Cay a palatable laxative and liver regulator. It offers a free sample and booklet from the Beating Remedy Co of Chicago or New York.
An excerpt mocks a Virginia speaker who, during a July address to Black listeners, claims Columbus landed on Plymouth Rock in 3196 and warns Democrats may ruin Virginia by echoing Rome. The piece satirizes racial rhetoric and historical misstatements, noting provocation to readers.
Fragmented verse lists names and odd phrases about John the Standard man taking a plate and van. It includes quirky lines like I will tell the truth and a reference to Detroit and biomech. The text reads like a garbled nursery rhyme fragment with unclear context.
A college dean warns students and parents against over assistance in homework. He recalls a Chicago mother who helped her child only to find the next day the child's solutions were wrong while others fared similarly. The tale illustrates how parental aid can hinder learning.
The Duluth Herald discusses a bill pending in Vermont to fine six to twenty five dollars for giving false information to a newspaper. It argues penalties should be stricter and spread to all states, noting practical jokes in notices of engagements and marriages harm victims and papers. It suggests enforcing penalties by legal action to deter Katzenjammer jokers.
Charles E. Wells known as the ground hog senator of West Virginia slept through an 5 am wake up at a Grand Hotel when the bellman pounded on his door to catch a train. A later apology from the night clerk corrected the mistaken door. The item also notes gun and fur trade ads and a piece on resigning at seventy with Grace Church rector William R Huntington.
Pat jokes Bridget misreads a scarecrow at breakfast mistaking it for a person. Mike comments that Bridget should consider a new suit or a younger wife, reflecting humorous banter about aging and misperception.
Louise de Knagenhjelm joins a Christmas procession at Fagervik in Sweden with Baron Knagenhjelm. A frostbound dawn reveals festive lights and a church service where love crosses continents as Louise accepts a life with the baron.
A illustrated guide to making holiday confections including fudge with fresh coconut and maple sugar, peanut brittle, old fashioned molasses candy, butter scotch, nigger heads candy, and cream taffy with step by step preparation tips. It notes ingredients, cooking times, and pulling or rolling methods for each sweet.
An anecdote recalls H G Wells visiting Boston and quarreling with Poe’s New England critics while Emerson is cited. Wells mocks Emerson and the Poe reception, then describes a landlady who compiles autograph lines from visitors in a drawing-room album. The tale ends with the landlady unknowingly sharing the cryptic verse with guests.
In a dialogue about Christmas shopping Jack asks for the meaning while George defines it as a female shopper seeking gifts for Christ mate during the season with a humorous note on female behavior and shopping.
A conversation between a grandmother and Thomas centers on Christmas dinner and a neighbor Johnny Green who has just lost his grandmother. The tale hints at guilt and a cryptic claim about confessing faults to any man who is willing, suggesting a moral or cautionary note.
The speaker argues success comes from ambition within one's reach rather than noble birth. He suggests history favors those who adapt and shape time, comparing imagined cases of poets and epic writers to illustrate the limits of inherited status and the value of personal effort.
A speaker uses Shakespearean allusions in a political address, but an audience member grows puzzled as the oration continues. The question echoes through the row as Hamlet becomes the unintended topic of debate among listeners.
An article touts constitutional cures for deafness caused by inflammation of the Eustachian tube. It claims nine of ten cases stem from catarrh and offers a $100 reward for any cure not achieved. Also discusses compulsory voting and a humorous ambulance field examination fragment.
Mrs Lovina J Henderson reports severe skin peeling hair loss and bed sores four years earlier. After using Cuticura Cream Soap and Ointment her complexion cleared and hair regrew, recalling relief from the products.
A fragmentary instruction describes curing bacon using young pigs weighing about 10 pounds. It covers slaughtering, trimming, packing in brine with salt brown sugar malt, and salting in a barrel then six weeks later smoking with hickory.
A geographic feature filled record describes Curacao and nearby ports. It notes population, climate, industry and inland access, highlighting Curacao as a key transit hub with growing industry in gas, phosphate and citrus.
An old lady known for predicting events is outwitted by her husband who bursts in with a dramatic exclamation. The wife shouts you all fool and claims I told you so as they argue over a favored cow and a grindstone. The piece notes New York City schools now have about 20,000 more pupils than a year ago.
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