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Sumner Gazette in Sumner, Iowa

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This newspaper page contains 37 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.

Newspaper

Sumner Gazette

Location

Sumner, Iowa, United States of America

Date

Oct 05, 1893

Page

2

To My Watch

The poem laments time's relentless advance and the fevered pace of life from birth to death. The speaker fixes on a watch as the measure of every joy and sorrow, wishing for faster moments to end pain and longing for rest that never comes. The verse contemplates memory, love, and the tide of time shaping human hearts.

The Tale of a Crime in the Chief of Surete Office

M Theodore, the chef de surete, broods over a spate of eight murders and a new femme galante killing. A visitor, Frederick louscal, claims to provide precise details about yesterday’s crime using a scientific method to reproduce the victim’s retinal image of the killer. The method promises a face or figure from the last viewed image, aiding identification.

M. Theodore Parbley Aranca Abe -Assas Monsieur Frederick l Ouscal Bouscal Chef de Sure M. le Chef

The Photographer and the Morgue Portrait Mystery

M. Theodore questions Frederick Bouscal about a missing son implicated in a murder. A Danidin police chef backs a plan to use photography to recreate a killer’s face from a corpse. Bouscal attempts the process but dies with his wife, a charcoal brazier signaling suicide.

Death by Own Action in Trifling Cause Controversy

A cryptic exchange in archaic French discourse questions if death can be justified for a trifling cause. The speaker rebukes a fellow official, debating the weight of a serious act tied to minor provocation, using formal tone and literary allusion.

Does Not Like Civilization An Arizona Cowboy's Views

Bob Lee, chief of a western show gang from Arizona, criticizes San Francisco life after a visit. He mocks city fashion and elevators, recalls Lucky Baldwin's bar, and compares city dangers to cow country. Lee stands six feet two, wiry and bronzed from outdoor life.

Bob” Lee Arizona San Francisco Bob Frisco The Examiner Lucky Baldwin Fom Si&i Mexico Lee

How to board and alight streetcars safely

A St Louis Globe-Democrat article stresses that many accidents stem from ignorance of boarding and alighting streetcars. It advises standing on the curb side, signaling the motorman, moving to the rear, using the rails, and stepping on and off with controlled footwork to avoid jolts and falls.

Mao Jio St. Louis Globe-Democrat

Laugh and Grow Fat Mamerous Avcctions Gleaned from Vari ous Sources

Fragmented parody text referencing sleep aids and behind the scenes burlesque talk, with mis-spelled names and quoted remarks. The piece reads as a satire or collage rather than a cohesive news item, including a mock exchange about a grand residence and an insistence on cash.

Dealer touts springed boat seats for rockers

A dealer touts a boat with seats that have powerful springs. By pressing a button, the springs hoist out any fool who tries to rock the boat. The customer asks to name their price at the exchange.

Woman Sewn Buttons Draws Crowd at World Fair Pack

In a crowded scene at the World’s Fair Pack a wife and husband exchange quips about a curious display. A woman sews suspender buttons on her husband’s trousers as onlookers react to the unusual exhibit. The exchange hints at broader social satire within the event.

Wellesley

Comfortable Now Peastraw Boarders Question

Te asks about keeping summer boarders as Oat cake declines. They reveal a new brick house is furnished and will be given up. Totter’s associate Featherstone notes Totter is not coming tonight due to a broken arm, raising concern for Miss Pinkerly about an artist.

Puck

Rainbow in the Heavens Promised Flood Ended

Fragment from a Sunday School overheard remarking on the rainbow as a promised flood ender. The quip suggests Noah used the sign to sell a yacht and support his family, reflecting a humorous take on biblical symbolism.

Willie Noah Puck

Unhappy Domestic Relations Quarrel Quoted

A holed exchange humor column recalls domestic tensions. The Indiana Journal notes a dispute over entertaining relatives while the husband resents the expense. An Exchange item jokes about a funeral guest.

Wickwire Indianaplis Journal

Mule’s Kick Breaks Leg and Becomes Wedding Date

A humorous exchange recalls a mule kicking Nienpeck and breaking his leg and two ribs. He quips he will never forget that day as he was married on the very day, a anecdote framed as Truth.

White boutonniere for grandfather's grave request

A brief exchange notes a request for a white boutonniere. The customer, Chicagoensis, asks a floorist to prepare one for a grandfather's grave, confirming color as white.

Fragmented classroom dialogue and a marriage remark

A disjointed excerpt shows a teacher giving a compass oriented instruction while Oscar Simons is teased for attention. A stray line references cart grease, followed by a recess remark. Laker proposes to a Mrs Penns, who rejects him, and a witty exchange ends with the line about being ahead.

Oscar Simons

The Same 1d Thing. Penelope Well and Married Life

The exchange focuses on Penelope Well and Younglove Rawther discussing married life and monotony. A quarrel with his wife surfaces, highlighting repetitive conflicts and routine domestic strains in their relationship.

Penelope Younglove

Westward, Hot Baggage Master-Say at World's Fair Pack

A clipped dialogue captures rough banter about travel danger and chest protectors. A judge and family physician exchange jibes with Tommy about a new title brother and manners, noting the boy's indifferent reaction to a cigarette.

Tommy LT Iest

Quotable quips on high church and doctors

A fragment from Detroit Free Press and Puck features wordplay about a sister figure marked as very high church and a doctor’s remark on low fever. The exchange hints at social satire and humorous miscommunication in patient care.

Detroit Free Press

Understanding electricity as motion across substances

The article explains electricity as molecular motion similar to heat, light, and sound, differing mainly by rate. It argues voltage adapts to multiple tasks because its vibration rate sits between sound and heat, enabling rapid transmission without destruction unless transformed to heat.

Mr Genteel Deadbeat and the Change Return

A compact comic exchange from Texas Sistings and related quips plays on manners and social tone. Jarspar mocks titles while a marquis entering court prompts a tense reply. Edythe teases about petty larceny as a kiss provokes playful banter in the Brooklyn Life style.

Texas Sistings Edythe Jack Brooklyn

Lodge meeting chat sparks playful banter

Dialogue between Mrs and Mr Bingo hints at household humor and financial tease about lending ten dollars. Comic quip contrasts mother in law jokes with blunt wife reaction. Newspaper clipping presents light, dated humor from Detroit Free Press and New York Weekly.

Bingo Detroit Free Press Blitters Fuaniman New York Weekly

May Blume Expresses Feelings For Supercur Brate

In a playful exchange, May Blume explains to Puck that her affection for Supercur Brate stems from his ability to make her belief in her own words. Rose Budd questions the reason, prompting Blume to respond with a lighthearted justification.

May Blume Rose Budd Puck

Canine Instinct Saves Cellini Robbery Night

Benvenuto Cellini recounts how his dog attacked a sword-wielding robber, woke workers, chased him, and held him until the crowd arrived. Later the dog identified the felon in Rome, recovering a ring, leading to confession. The tale ends with the robber seeking pardon as the dog’s instinct is praised.

Benvenuto Cellni Cellini Rome Cellins

Flour mill blast prompts wonder at new flour

In a New York Weekly voice a character muses that a big flour mill explosion reveals the source of self raising flour. West state of affairs and Mrs. Binks react with shock and speculation about modern baking inventions.

Binks West

Working Dogs in Belgium Report from Liege

Consul Smith reports from Liege Belgium that the city rich in industry houses the world’s largest machine factory and many horses. Yet two dogs are seen per bourse in harness on streets at all hours, especially busy in early mornings. Typical dog draft is six hundred pounds though a larger load is possible.

Consul Smith Liege Belgium Washington Europe

Cyclone Tales and Telegraph Banter in Small Town Talk

A rugged farmer jokes about a second wife after a cyclone carries off the first. The exchange shifts to war era gear with Penelope critiquing a magazine gun and its bore. The banter ends with quips on animal taste in music and a nose joke about pure air.

Farmer Jones Vansity Penelope Humph Tom Barry

Siberia a continent of climate and vast wealth

A lengthy survey details Siberia as more than sub-arctic land, noting its 5,493,629 square miles area, vast provinces like Tobolsk, Yeniseisk, and Yakutsk, diverse climates from −50°F in January to 95–100°F in summer, fertile southern belts with tobacco and grain, and striking floral scenes described by George Kennan, highlighting landscapes, crops, and population activity across the region.

Siberia Globe United States of America Maine California Lake Superior Gulf of Mexico Alaska Europe Russia United States Siberian Empire Germany European Tobolsk Iowa Yeniseisk Mississippi River Yakutsk Great Britain Pennsylvania Massachusetts Italy Greenland Semipalatinsk Taimyr Peninsula Gulf of Ob London Ural Mountains Pacific England Urals Tiumen George Kennan

The Cleverest Thief Exposed in Mail Car Heist

A U S postal inspector recalls a Montana to Chicago mail theft where large $100 bills packed in registered letters vanished monthly. The bags were intact and sealed, the baggageman spyhole revealed a mail clerk stealing, described as one of the most ingenious thefts heard, the culprit caught en route.

United States Postoffice West Montana Chicago Montana Bank Vneo

Methods for Preserving Hams and Shoulders After Smoking

The Germantown Telegraph describes two reliable methods. First, hang ham and shoulder in a dry cool stone smoke house, shank down, in darkness, unused for any other purpose, and retrieve when needed. Hams reportedly keep two years, sweet and insect free. Second, in absence of a smoke house, cover meat with dry wood ashes in tight four dozen casks, dry sifted, rub into meat, and store in attic or outhouse until needed. Both methods are offered from direct experience and recommended for trial.

Germantown

Unwanted Precaution On Electric Streetcar Fear

A young, pretty woman is described as terrified of electricity, delaying boarding a trolley car behind an electric vehicle. The conductor, a policeman, and even a passerby man show patience as she avoids the steps and mutters she is scared to death of electricity.

Boston Journal

Curious Kondeh People Near Nyassa Described By Merensky

At the Berlin Anthropological Society Merensky portrays the Kondeh of the German Nyassa district. Their homeland sits north of the Livingstone Mountains and south by the lake enabling advanced civilization. They value friendship and cross gender bonds, with strong domestic affections. Self harm in grief leads some to drown themselves. In war, captives are freed, and women hold high status with laws favoring them and stricter punishment for crimes against women.

Berlin Anthropological Society Merensky Lake Nyassa Livingstone Mountains St. James Gazette

Morphine Fiend and Never Tasted Explained

A Philadelphia Record item reports a chemist describing a lab worker who absorbs morphine through the skin while weighing it. The woman, employed in a large lab, stays well during the week but on Sundays suffers insomnia and wretchedness as morphine reaction sets in, risking gradual physical breakdown rather than injections.

Chestnut Street Philadelphia

Those Wooden Nutmexs and Connecticut Peddlers

The Stortford Times notes a speculative rustic joke about wooden nutmegs sold by Connecticut peddlers. It argues the fraud cost in time and labor would exceed profits and notes the tale harmed the state’s reputation for cunning.

Connecticut Stortford Times

Proverbial Faith Notes on Duty and Godly Living

A compact collection of moral maxims urging religious conduct in daily life. It exhorts loving God through service, patience, self-control, and prayer while warning against worldly pride, ignorance, and reliance on intellect alone. The tone echoes late nineteenth or early twentieth century sermonettes.

The Petrel Bird and Its Curious Habits

The petrel, a sea bird, thrives in storms and produces loud calls with the sea. Sailors fear it as ill luck, while the bird sleeps by forming a feather ball and resting on oily water, never sinking. Its fat body aids buoyancy, and dead birds are used as lamps. Nesting stays on shore only for nests between rocks or in sand, with one egg per season and parental care by the female. Often called Mother Carey's chickens.

Mother Carey

Estimating Thunder Distance by Lightning Timing

A Louisville Post Dispatch note explains that sound travels 1100 feet per second while light is nearly instantaneous. By counting thunder pulses against lightning flashes, the interval in seconds converts to feet and miles, guiding lay readers to approximate storm distance.

Louisville Post-Dispatch

Curious Chinese Nail Cultivation Impresses Gentlemen

The text notes Chinese fashion of cultivating very long fingernails as a sign of gentility and avoidance of manual labor. Nails can reach eight or nine inches and are protected by hollow bamboo to prevent damage, often rendering the hand nearly useless.

Also Mentioned on This Page

Sumner Gazette Sumner Tims Earth Imine Frederick Bouscal Mic Chel Frederick Bous Cal Mr Theodore Credit Agricole M. Je Chef Chef Je Chet Mheodore Surde Ternes Rue Laugiere Bouscals Sau Jinkins CEE Tea Knorr Laker Mike Biddy Jaspar Benvenuto Cellini Manrie Ethel Fidu Working Dogs Kidder Banks Pyck van Petr Javalid Ram Arkiness Light Christ Gnd Grod Little Peter
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