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This newspaper page contains 5 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Sterling Script
Location
Sterling, Illinois, United States of America
Date
Apr 01, 1963
Page
2
A playful warning from SHS notes a campus malady described as spring fever. It mocks tired students, describes a long walk with heavy purses, and praises a recovery plan including a recuperation week in April and a booster energy class aid from the junior class.
A spoof letter dated March 33 19361 shares comical woes about delayed mail, moved family, and misfortunes. It notes a cousin with mumps near death s door a grandma feeling run down and an uncle Joe who died of a heart leak then adds a humorous postscript about forgetting money owed.
Local rumors swirl about a SHS track athlete secretly training since January on late nights using Wheaties Sugar Pops and Tang to run a three minute mile. Eyewitnesses report midnight footprints gravel sounds and a jerky Clementine chant while a timekeeper confirms regular three minute laps but withholds the runner’s name saying he is shy.
The administration cancels this year’s prom due to embezzlement by Robert Marsh class treasurer. FBI investigator I L Nabem tracked the scheme via a turkish bath and alligator-skin storage, discovering forty seven blue kites as possible evidence.
Scroll Hall of Fame entries describe Miss Dickson buying a television and dreaming of Walden Pond or a nun's retreat while Mr Speer recalls early travels and Shakespeare lines. The quirky piece volleys humorous glimpses into teachers as travelers and trivia lovers, ending with a coy tease about personal tales.
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