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Newspaper
Shepherdstown Register
Location
Shepherdstown, West Virginia, United States of America
Date
Nov 22, 1900
Page
3
A columnist jokes about a senator's wife who decorates their meals with labeled dishes to deflect a critical husband. He taunts each course with notes like This is soup and This is roast beef, sparking her quiet wit and ending his habit of scrutinizing her cooking.
A compact collection of maxims and wry observations on women talkativeness courtrooms parenting dreams and self respect. The selections blend humor and cultural commentary with dated phrasing and proverb style remarks.
A list of local incidents follows with violence and misfortune. In Logan county Albert Stinson killed Adies McCoy and drowned while fleeing toward Kentucky after the crime. Virginia College at Roanoke burned, roughly $10,000 in loss and insurance. Also noted are judicial retirements, university presidency planning, a bear hunt near Dobbin in Grant county, and a fatal razor attack linked to a love dispute near Huntington.
A village blacksmith Mr HUE Black of Dinokewith Grahwineville Sullivan County New York reports his five year old son born with recurring croup and fears for his life. He attributes improvement to Chamberlains Cough Remedy which he says dissolves the cough and cures croup without opiates. The remedy is available at Reimharts Pharmacy. The excerpt also includes a curious balloon parachute joke and a long consumer advisory on household measures and cooking quantities from Ladies Home.
A Southern Mieimat farmer received a postage envelope bearing the warning Paneily for private nies. The note, printed in a rough hand, urged him to weed and prepare fields, mentioning the Youth’s Companion and a mass mailing of sample copies. The scene hints at a promotional stunt tied to subscriptions and the cost of delivery.
Fragmentary OCR text references Martinsburg and Hagerstown with scattered names and dates. It mentions a chamber event and several unclear personal names, with incomplete lines about mechanisms and weeks ending with Sunday, but contains no coherent narrative or verifiable facts.
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