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This newspaper page contains 17 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Saint Johns Review
Location
Saint Johns, Oregon, United States of America
Date
Jan 08, 1909
Page
4
An excerpt from the New York Tribune recounts the origin of the name The Shillalah Thrabiliniah and describes an involved process tied to a barony in Wicklow Ireland. It details how a “best ehilldiah” root sapling is cultivated then hardened, dried, and stored, with proprietors closely watching its maturation and behavior.
A younger wife mispronounces hot Scotch as hot Bootet inviting an overnight guest. George, clearly embarrassed, denies inviting the cousin while the husband laughs at the confusion. The scene unfolds as the wife probes the meaning of the toast in a tense office setting in New Orleans.
A collection of eclectic notes and anecdotes from various sources including Anacharsis on a Leonardo da Vinci painting theft, a London Chronicle piece on cold storage rates, and other curiosities. The peninsular news aims to secure a local correspondence network with weekly reports from multiple localities.
Extracted anecdotes describe a young Vermont worker praised for potential yet deemed green by a foreman who tests him with a dangerous task. The scene illustrates harsh, formative methods used on a four year build crew. It also recounts Thomas Nast’s skill at distorting features in caricatures and how he used memory tricks to fix likenesses for political satire.
A window scene at Mira Nansen's home reveals a carrier pigeon returning after thirty long months with a note from Nansen about his polar voyage. The bird, carrying a message to reassure Mira, flies back through vast oceans and forests to deliver the awaited image. Nearby, a court case unfolds with a sharp remark on insanity pleas during a jury deliberation.
The passage stitches stray lines from multiple newspapers, including Cleveland Leader and Chicago News, noting remarks by Freshman Mathematics professors and misquoted banter about integrity and motives. It reads as a collage of garbled quotes and fictional dialogue.
A critique of Admiral Porter during Grant’s term describing his belief in sails and the removal of four blade screws from a ship to two blades, causing speed issues. The piece notes later that propellers were restored and claims the ships ran slower under mutilated screws. It mentions Porter’s continued naval stance and contrasts with engineering views. Also referenced are the Desert Tortoise and its surprising desert travel behavior with two water sacks, their climbing ability, and a dramatic description of a tortoise lifting itself via tail and head.
Captain Roald Amundsen recalls his crews adapting Bakimo dress during expeditions. Some men mocked fringe on clothing as childish but the author notes its cultural meaning. A future fringe removal nearly ruined the look until it was restored.
In a playful snippet from an old paper, a Proud Sam Smith debates gender with a boy named Tom and laments grammar, while a drunken exchange at a bar prompts a wary publican and a punny misreading of credit. Other brief bits poke fun at names meaning and a punchline about business and clever talk.
Telegram note lists train times for Oregon routes with departures at 8 30 a m and 7 00 p m. It mentions city arrivals at 9 45 and a 5 45 p m local passenger, urging readers to subscribe to the Telegram west evening paper and to check the paper label for identifications.
Major Holmes Day recalls a Maine woodsman’s bank on two legs run by Uncle Nate Swan. For decades he steered a Bangor and Piscataquis railroad crew, collecting ten dollar bills deposited for safe keeping. Depositors trusted him to sink funds for travel, fare, and tobacco at the lake outfitting store.
A column recounts Hall Caine’s anecdote about Wilkie Collins and the scorned villain Fosco, then shifts to London bayonets and regiments with fixed bayonets, tracing Royal Fusiliers and Kant Kent Butta lineage, Marine ties, and a grenadier battalion’s amphibious tattoo “Rule Britannica.”
A collage of quotes from The Mental Joy features observers in New York and elsewhere noting how listeners respond only to triggers like Listen now or Now hear. It contrasts a stenographer, a telephone operator, and office chatter with lines about rain and wind. Jokes from The Grakemen's Joke and brief satirical exchanges close the piece.
A fragment recalls a debate about the marriage of Florence to Mr Gunson. One speaker notes he is old enough to be her father while another questions social fit, remarking he is wealthy enough to marry her. The exchange hints at class and age expectations in a Victorian era setting.
The text outlines customary charges for cards of thanks and resolutions of respect, and fees for notices of church or lodge entertainments with admission charges. It notes that if events have no admission, the notices will be printed free, and mentions a rule about charging.
A mixed list of church notices includes Sunday school times and worship services at multiple faith communities such as Methodist, Catholic, Christian, Episcopal, Congregational, Evangelical, Baptist, German Baptist, and German Lutheran churches. It names pastors like Johin Hentai S. H. Yewart J. Johnson Rev. Win K. Powell Lenton services and weekly gatherings across University Park Portemouth and surrounding areas with times ranging from early morning to evening.
The notice urges customers to bring in printing, praise our superior stock and workmanship, and warns against using flimsy stock. It argues that small savings on price harm long term customer loyalty, preferring first class results and repeat business over short term gains.
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