The stump speaker almost disappeared say official humor
Mrs. Torkins notes an article claiming the old-fashioned stump speaker has nearly vanished. The joke explains that government tree cutting restrictions have probably reduced stump supply.
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Newspaper
Saco Independent
Location
Saco, Montana, United States of America
Date
Aug 18, 1916
Page
2
Mrs. Torkins notes an article claiming the old-fashioned stump speaker has nearly vanished. The joke explains that government tree cutting restrictions have probably reduced stump supply.
Promote Cuticura ointment and soap for quick pimple relief. Apply ointment lightly to affected area for five minutes then bathe with hot water and soap. Best on rising and retiring but effective anytime. Free sample by mail with book. address postcard to Cuticura Dept. L Boston. Sold everywhere.
A barber comments that he dislikes the appearance of Republican nominees while a patron jokes about Democratic nominees possibly using different grooming tools. The exchange hints at political differing perceptions through a casual grooming metaphor.
Dr J H Rindlaub reports on a plant inspection where a branch circuit fault caused fuses to blow at unpredictable intervals. A ground detector warned of trouble and a box yielded a shower of live and dead cockroaches as insulation had been eaten away by vibration and deterioration.
The document notes a wartime boost to U S wood flour production with over 20 000 tons valued at 300 000 made mainly in small mills from Maine to California. Used in linoleum as cork substitute and in wallpaper coatings. Wood flour is produced from sawdust and waste lumber once burned at mills.
A fragment notes Philadelphia produces nearly 50 million yards of carpets and adds a quip about a nap. It also mentions Lemuel Wombat buying a fine buggy and hints at a court appearance for an old-fashioned girl.
Sixty eight candidates from three parties appear on the official ballot for state office nominations. Democrats hold 29 petitions, Republicans 36, Socialists 13. Some Republicans failed to file completed petitions. Adjutant General Greenan says 50 Second Montana guardsmen may be discharged to attend fall schooling, after Sept 1 1916, if bona fide intent to enroll is shown.
A buzzing swarm trapped forty students at Langworth School for half a day after bees hive in the roof. Teacher Ida Warford was stung while pupils and staff battled the insects with water and improvised weapons until parents returned with sulfur to rout the swarm. Several children and nearby animals suffered multiple stings.
Mrs. Thomas Sawyer found the cause of her husband Thomas Sawyer’s death after opening a Bible beside his charred body on a Colorado ranch. Interlined Genesis verses described Abraham’s sacrifice and matched the scene of a pyre of wood and stones. The burned corpse was unidentifiable except for the Bible.
Horace Emmons of Northville visits Winchester school site after 50 years. He recalls hiding a pipe with two stones forming a cavity near the wall to keep it from his teacher Mrs. Nellie Miller. While searching last week he fell under the stones but did not locate the pipe.
Margaret Tuttle notes in the Saturday Evening Post that bicycles have surged back in Florida. Despite cheaper motor cars, riders throng Palm Beach streets, with bicycles everywhere from curbs to verandas. Hundreds wait to be hired near the veranda. others fill roads and lobbies with riders and bells.
The will of Mrs. Sarah Gray Crane created a $75 000 trust for Amherst College trustees after her husband Dr. Edward A. Crane left most of his estate to her. It recounts how Crane saved Empress Eugenie from a Paris mob on September 4 1870 arranging her secret flight to Deauville after the Sedan news and passage on Lord Burghoyne’s yacht to England. The empress rewarded Crane with a pearl.
A German insurance company plans a department of aerial insurance offering policies covering damage to property caused by explosive projectiles or falling from aircraft. The policies exclude injury to or loss of life. Demand grows as air raids on western front cities prompt interest.
Yale will admit a limited number of women to its medical school. Admission requires evidence that female students possess equipment to maintain the institution’s high standard, reflecting a guarded but progressing shift in gender policy.
A minister greeted a new Swedish girl in his congregation and offered to call on her. She replied with innocent bluntness that she has a man, signaling a prior relationship.
A witty line notes that the man in the moon thrives on a high ball. The remark casts celestial figure as enjoying elevated humor and light sport.
The creature avoids confrontation, preferring to recoil when faced with danger rather than retreating aggressively. This behavior highlights its cautious, protective response to threats.
A bolt struck the Crooks residence in Wausau Wisconsin entering a bedroom where three children slept. The bed posts were shattered and plaster fell from the ceiling but none of the children was hurt and one was found fast asleep.
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