Two Miles from Land Joke Onboard Steam Ship
A humorous exchange on a steam ship en route to New Orleans. A passenger asks how far the ship is from land and learns two miles. When she asks the direction, the reply says land is straight down, prompting a lighthearted punchline.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New Orleans
Gulf
Five Months in Hospital Then Discharged as Incureable
Patient from Anoka Minnesota recounts five months in hospital with heart trouble and failing kidneys. After starting Dean's Kidney Pills the condition improved. claims to have regained health and now feels well. Sold for all dealers at AA cents a box by Foster Milburn Co. Tatfato New York.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
P. Brockway
S. Second Avenue
Anoka
Mianu
Dean
Foster-Milburn Co
Tatfato
N.Y
Fragmentary dialogue recalls a fire and a missing notice
A clipped Harper's Weekly style exchange notes Rowell as an observant figure and Powell remarking that a person could be dead for a long time without realizing a fire occurred. The fragment hints at a neglected incident or forgotten alert in a public setting.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Howell
Rowell
Powell
Harper's Weekly
Old-Fashioned Reception Noted for Old-Time Charm
A light social piece describes an old-fashioned reception hosted by Mrs Hopper. The event features traditional decor and a surprising touch of quality refreshments that guests found unexpectedly wholesome and tasty.
Eleven Years of Eczema and Remedies Timeline
Stated sufferer describes eleven years with cracked bleeding hands and swollen fingertips. Trials including Cure Soap Curia Oda and Cuticine remedies gave no relief until a later application reportedly cured symptoms.
Exotic Traveler Quips On Heat Near The Equator
A traveler remarks it is very hot under the equator with locals tending hens to prevent them from leaving. The London Mail note hints at a lively exchange and implies humorous mishearings during the journey.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London Mail
Piles Cure Advertised with Money Back Guarantee
An ad promises a remedy named in the copy to cure piles within 14 days. It claims a money back guarantee if relief is not achieved and mentions a refund policy. The offer targets readers seeking treatment and stresses quick results and satisfaction.
Notable Rant Echoes in Catholic Standard and Times
Fragmentary newspaper quote shows a heated exchange with a voice from the Gallery railing at detractors. The piece captures a caustic tone and confrontational rhetoric amid a public scene, reflecting tensions in the era's Catholic press.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Catholic Standard and Times
Constant Worry Over Ill Child Keeps Family Awake
Mrs Nupop-Paby stayed awake with the colic all night, as Jim grew anxious waiting for news. His mother asks why, and she notes he has slept for three hours without waking, a sign of concern for his condition.
Extre mely Absert Minded Professor I
A quirky note appears to lampoon forgetfulness by a professor type, blending playful mis-spellings and odd phrases about forgetting a handkerchief and tying a tie. The piece maintains a humorous, pseudo scholarly tone with imagined names and items.
Knockout Drops Aids to Crime Plaguing Big City
A historical warning on knockout drops used by criminals to rob victims. The piece recounts cases where drinks or candy hide morphine or chloral hydrate, leaving victims unconscious while thieves plunder. It notes dangers for the elderly, gamblers, and women in the levee district.
Woman's Adaptability in Married Life
A discussion on a wife’s self suppression in marriage, balancing emotions and conflict. It argues sustained harmony comes from tact, yielding, and not revealing inner feelings, with love guiding the suppression of personal tastes to preserve family stability and children’s well being.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Ares
Bret
Whistler Jests With Young Artist Over Tolerable Egg
A young artist shows his maiden painting to Mr. Whistler. After a silent moment the artist asks if his work is tolerable. Whistler replies by comparing it to a tolerable egg, delivering a wry, playful remark in Harper's Weekly.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mr. Whistler
Harper’s Weekly
Smokeless cigar dream teased in a witty exchange
In a humorous dialogue, Mrs. Fidgety notes that while wireless telegraphy and smokeless powder exist, men have not pursued a smokeless cigar. The quip highlights playful skepticism about invention and progress in the era.
Two Frank Confederate Generals
The Century recalls a Civil War veteran who confessed regret that the Confederacy failed to form a separate nation. He admitted sorrow over the outcome, sparking a debate with another general who dismissed him as a perpetual failure. The piece reflects on enduring attitudes among old Confederates.
Donkey Sales Talk Among Apparently Quarrelsome Traders
A brief exchange shows Green seeking a donkey for sale, Strown stating a purchase just yesterday, and Green urging use of a good donkey whenever needed. The banter suggests ongoing informal deals and interest in livestock.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Green
Strown
No Trouble for Her in Neighborly Quarrel Remark
A neighbor teased Mrs. Clancy about trouble, she retorted that she had none while noting the quarrel was with her husband and that Clancy had all the trouble.
Climate debate on American boys and British childhood
An Englishwoman cited by the New York Commercial Advertiser says American climate suits boys, noting her Yorkshire-born sons lag in numbers but surpass British brothers in brains and quick learning. Her husband adds American boys are more assertive and critical of elders, while British lads revered their father and resembled a foreign old fool to Yankees.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mre
New York
The Lady Caller Punchline
The exchange defines opportunity as infrequent and selective, with the optimist asserting doors open to chance and the pessimist noting opportunity appears when one is away. The quip underscores the era's witty take on luck and timing.
Knock Out Blow Advice From The New York Press
The New York Press suggests a future world champion should study anatomy to learn that blows to the temples or lower jaw can produce swift knockouts. It notes the temporal muscle links the jaw to the temple, and observers can see temple movement when chewing.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York Press
Hall's Catarrh Cure Advertisement Promise Reward
This ad offers one hundred dollars reward for any catarrh case not cured by Hall's Catarrh Cure. It includes testimonials from Wanping, NKinxan & Marvin, wholesale druggists of Toledo, promoting the product and noting internal use to affect blood and nervous surfaces. It also mentions the product price and mail order information.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Hall
Cheney & CO
Toledo
Cheney
Wanping
Nkinxan & Marvin
C. Halls
Malis
Fairy tale openings vary say Glasgow News
The Glasgow News quips that fairy tales do not always begin with Once upon a time. A mother replies that tales may begin with My love I have been detained at the office again tonight, reflecting a humorous urban twist.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mamma
Tommy
Glasgow News
Up-To-Date Sermon on Money and the Plate
A Detroit Free Press fragment urges readers to not neglect the offering despite tight markets. The brief note counsels faithfulness in giving even amid financial troubles and a cautious money market.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Detroit Free Press
Bromo Quinine Laxative Endorsed by El W Grove
Ad claims a universal cold cure with Bromo Quinine laxative sold for 25¢ and signed by El W Grove. The copy asserts worldwide use and the product name is emphasized as the remedy.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
EL W. Grove
Mrs. Austin's Famous Paycakes Sellout Breakfast Boom
East 10 buy easy to try the best whole some appetizing breakfast is Mrs. Austin's famous paycakes. The ad cites a quick reaction to a cook and bakes many items in one day, suggesting strong home breakfast demand.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
East 10
Mrs. Austin
Conundrums from a Prayer Book Quiz
A playful quiz item notes that the prayer book allows a man sixteen wives, with the rhyme four better four worse four richer four poorer totaling sixteen. It then asks what Adam and Eve did when expelled from Eden and answers they raised Cain.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Adam
Eve
Eden
Cain
The Scholar Dr Evans Retorts He Knew Queen Anne
Dr Evans a wit in Melbourne Parliament is teased about knowing Queen Anne. He replies that the scholar is contemporary with all time, noting his long lifetime and broad knowledge.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Evans
Melbourne
Queen Anne
Daughters to Be Slaves Among Circassians
A historical note describes Circassian communities in the Caucasus basing custom on selling daughters into slavery to Turkish and Persian buyers, resulting in Circassian women appearing in harems rather than at home.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Caucasus
Orient
Literary Club Nightfold Laughs At Chips in the Night
A wife mocks her husband for a late night poetry recitation at the literary club. He recalls hearing a quirky line about chips that bash in the night, recalling a BaltimoreAmerican style quip.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Baltimore American
Age Inquiry Sparks Shifty Exchange in Court
A magistrate questions a woman involved in a fray about ages. The woman deflects, saying she is five years younger than the one who had her pinched, and urges the magistrate to ask that person first. The exchange appears in the St. Louis Republic.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
St. Louis Republican
Realism debate over meadow advertising in stage scenery
The star objects to scenery ads while the manager defends them as authentic. The exchange centers on whether stage visuals should mirror real life or prioritize commercial appearance.
A Modern Instance Knicker-It Blessings
A modern instance notes that Knicker-It is more blessed to give than to receive while Becker argues the opposite for a bank receiver referencing the New York Sun.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Becker
New York Sun
What Bobbie Wanted
A nurse brings a baby brother to the family and Bobbie refuses to look at him, asking to see the angel instead. The scene contrasts a child’s imagined guardian with the real newborn.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Bobbie
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Naas
K Thompson
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Dodds
Guar
the Lady Caller
Philadelphia Press
Fairy
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the Scholar
Daniel
E’m
Israel
Puck
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Earl S. Sloan
Mass
U. S.A
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AM Fadeles