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Newspaper
Riverdale Pointer
Location
Riverdale, Illinois, United States of America
Date
May 14, 1909
Page
3
A dinner tale unfolds as a judge boasts of wrecking a train in a misguided plan to stop a runaway romance. In flashback he recalls Charleston 1850s events, mistaken notes, and a ballroom mishap that ruined a dress but altered his life, ending with a vow that the wreck changed his fate.
A professor tests a waitress with a long inquiry about whisky and milk. He insists it proves a scientific truth that whisky improves with age while milk does not, and asks for fresh milk. The waitress snaps, and the professor mutters that she has no sense of humor.
A Chicago Daily News cartoon caption recalls a political speech where the orator asked the audience for attention but a cabbage was tossed from the gallery. He replied with a joking quip about caring for ears, not a head. The anecdote highlights public heckling in parliamentary settings.
A Royal Magazine line quotes a glowing reporter saying a beauty wore dainty shoes like fairy boots, then notes he left in haste for unknown parts. A mischievous morning reversal claims her dirty feet wore shoes that could be ferry boats, changing the image.
A dialogue quoted in the Kansas City Times where a man confronts a woman about claiming he was not serious. She calmly explains she dreamt pleasant things and would think of a proposal only in dreams, while acknowledging his earnestness.
A Yonkers Statesman quip frames a stingy joke about divorce. A husband admits kissing his wife earlier, then reveals plans to divorce to keep her feelings pleasant. The exchange shows wit over marital separation in a lighthearted manner.
A short vignette describes a niece reading spice names by scent while auntie tidies pantry shelves. The child proclaims reading ability, but explains she reads not by sight but by smell, illustrating a sensory distinction in a quiet domestic moment.
A fragment shows dialogue between characters about a phone call and a sister noticing Nell removing pins from her belt, indicating a moment of precaution or mischief in a scene likely from a comic or dramatic piece.
Gustav Mich aud reviews an experiment with fourteen glasses each given common hydrochloric acid to react with varied contents. Observed effects include heating, cooling, color changes, flames, odor changes, and rapid solidification, illustrating diverse chemical changes from a single reagent.
Instructions show building a bow kite using a bow three fourths the length of a 40 inch upright rod. The bow measures 30 inches with a cross string forming a 20 inch gap at ends and ten inches from the top along the center stick. Fasten the bow an inch below the end, notch and bind, wind the cross string, and tie leads to the ends threading around a groove near the lower end. Use willow or hoop for the bow and find the center by measure, then whittle for balance.
Professor Arthur Korn of Berlin claims a device proves gravitation theories by vibrating a water filled globe with an electric motor to create an exact solar system model. Planets move along established paths without visible support or external power.
The Iron Age Review notes in 1907 the United States Patent Office processed 57,679 applications and issued 36,620 patents. Weekly averages show over 1,100 filings and 700 patents issued, with government fees totaling more than 1,600,000 dollars and total application costs likely exceeding 6,000,000 dollars.
The public is urged to abandon the belief that whiteness equals bread quality. The piece argues that bleaching flour destroys its natural color and flavor, calling such tampering with the staff of life an illegal practice.
A remark from Town and Country notes that no Englishman shows anger at foreign criticism and, instead, laughs and is amused, reflecting a poised view of national temperament. The comment frames national behavior as genteel and self-contained when faced with outside critique.
A concise note describes achieving exact balance at the center on the knife’s edge. The phrasing evokes precision and delicate equilibrium, suggesting a moment of fine control or a metaphor for precision in handling a sharp instrument.
Burges Johnson’s verse prays for meekness and honesty for a boy, urging gentle thoughts and unselfish acts. The item notes the Royal Academy of England founded in 1768 and a London building by Smirke from 1868-69, linking poem and architectural history in a brief clipping style.
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