No title available from OCR fragment
The text is a humorous collection of satirical maxims about public policy and daily life. It references graduates, calendar reform, stock market bets, jokes, cookie jars, rest versus arrests, capital relocation, jail terms, handy men, and early satire linked to Eve and Adam.
Drowning Dangers Prompt Swim Education For Youths
As summer heats rise reports of drownings grow and many swim without proper skill. The piece urges teaching all children to swim as part of education to prevent watery deaths and promote safe water use.
No suitable full headline in fragment
Fragment discusses women’s sports in historical dress and notes Mrs. Bloomer proposed ideas to improve female athletic activity by challenging restrictive costumes.
The Bloomers Anniversary Observed for Amelia Bloomer
The birth of Amelia Bloomer was observed recently. In 1851 she advocated dress reform with a short skirt and loose trousers gathered at the ankle, then deemed a gross impropriety. The female sex has moved far since Mrs. Bloomer’s day.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Amelia Bloomer
Mrs. Bloomer
Dane
Geneva delegates debate arms limits amid disarmament doubt
Nations at Geneva discuss curbing war armament costs amid fears neighbors will flout any agreement. Analysts note heavy spending bankrupting countries and warn that large arsenals raise risk of accidental use if weapons proliferate.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Geneva
Fool Proof Stock Market
The article discusses a bill to regulate stock exchanges aiming for a fool proof market by curbing abuses and requiring complete financial statements from issuing corporations. It cautions that investors take risks and warns that many will not study statements, noting that nothing ventures, nothing has. the bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
NRA shifts policy to curb price fixing and restore competition
The National Recovery Administration announces a policy change aimed at restricting price fixing to prevent monopolistic pricing in various trades. It argues free competition lowers consumer costs but warns of plant closures and unfair wages if firms cannot compete. A central need for regulation is urged.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
NRA
Solomon
The Perils of Nineteen A Warning From Justice
The piece notes nineteen year olds show the highest arrest rates per U.S. Justice data. It argues 19 is a peak of youthful confidence, especially among college sophomores, who may believe they outrun authority and society. It cautions against underestimating such youths as they reach adulthood.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
U. S. Department of Justice
Weather Bureau Plan To Observe Upper Air
The weather bureau will implement a plan in July allowing government aviators to rise to about 17 000 feet for regular observations. Studying upper air conditions should improve predictions as surface winds and high cloud directions often differ, indicating varying conditions aloft.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
United States Weather Bureau
French Demand Graceful Deal as U S Faces Wine Trade
French policy observers urge the United States to absorb the financial default with restraint and consider using French wines as a stabilizing influence in the ensuing trade discussions.
Electric gift ideas and social quips crowd a busy night
A bustling scene mixes quips about murder accusations and stolen items with comic lines on gifts for wives and electric chairs. A Dolton man jokes about appliances while diners complain of soup and a waiter’s thumb. A Kansas businessman riffs on a novelty cocktail, blending whisky water gin ice lemon and sugar as a toast.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Kansas
New York City
Not Taking Chances With a Lawyer Turned Patient
A scene unfolds as a physician refuses to treat ailing lawyer who once cross examined him. The doctor refuses to kill and ends the encounter with a curt farewell, signaling risk and ethical tension in a courtroom figure.
Weather Haze Increases Heat Amid Steam Talk
The examiner asks about steam while Pat answers with confidence. Pat notes the weather has gone crazy with heat, signaling a humid and oppressive day.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Pat
Expensive Horse Sold After Civil War Curried Price
A Civil War veteran recalls a Confederate soldier offering $1,000 in Confederate notes for a horse. The owner balked, noting he had paid only $3.60 to have the animal curried. The tale highlights the era’s currency value and wartime contrasts.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Minneapolis
Fiat Money
Two Dollars Missing Prompt Office Mystery
In a tense exchange a boss and office boy discuss a missing two dollars from a desk drawer. Only they possess keys, prompting a plan to each contribute a dollar and drop the issue. The dialogue hints at internal suspicion and a casual handling of the discrepancy.
David Harum Scene Prompts Shell Shock Joke
Will Rogers cracks hickory nuts with teeth in David Harum while director James Cruze frets about lockjaw. Rogers quips that he seeks shell shock, not danger, as the cast and crew push through a playful moment. The line hints at optimism and faith guiding production.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
David Harum
Will Rogers
James Cruze
Bill
Rogers
Spoke Out of Turn in a Quaint Street Car Scene
A brief vignette with a clerk offering a service to a woman driving and a boy’s cheerful question about riding a street car. Dad comments on old-fashioned manners while a dancing teacher anecdotes about teaching a bashful man to dance.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Junior
Gauky
Children grow faster here than in any other land
Local chatter jokes about American boys growing faster than peers abroad. A Dolton husband quips about worrying children as his wife distracts him with remarks during a bridge game. A South Holland newlywed notes men who talk back, joking about marriage and chiropractors.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Dolton
Otto Sorgenfrei dies at 74 former city fire and police chief
Otto Sorgenfrei aged 74 of Blue Island died Thursday June 7. He served as fire chief and police chief for the city and led the state firemen's association and the national organization as president in 1918 1914. He was survived by his wife Lena sister Emma Danner and brothers Edward and Ernet. Funeral services were held Saturday at 2 30 p m from Krueger's Funeral Home.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Otto Sorgenfrei
New Street
Fike Iuishul
Krueger
Sorgenfrei
William Sorgenfrei
Blue Island
State Firemen’s Association
National Firemen’s Association
Lena
Funeral attendees listed for Reich Ripley and Dolton ties
Dale and Dolton attended the funeral with a list including L. E. Reich Edward A. Ripley Riverdale and Dolton residents Al Heinke Henry J. Mohr Morris West Ed Dillner Fred Ott Leonard Diehl Chas F Murphy and Frank Ott.
Grade Crossing Accidents Rise In Early 1934
The piece notes a 34 percent increase in railroad grade crossing accidents in the first two months of 1934 compared with the same period a year earlier. It laments motorists rushing crossings and miscalculating train speeds, urging caution and the old advice to stop look and listen.
Also Mentioned on This Page
Thomas F. Kinney
A. M. Levy
Chicago
North Michigan Ave
Tower
Riverdale
Illinois
Congress
Cook County
Eve
Adam
Paradise
America
Guestason
God
Dad
South Holland
First Trust & Savings Bank
Monarch Roofing CompAny
Henry N. Yonker
Perry Avenue
Commodore
Dick Hoyt
SOL
Hohman Avenue
Hammond
Ind
Carl Dieck
Lincoln Avenue
A. W. Hamann Chiropractor
Michigan Avenue
Roseland
Fray’s Flower Shop
SAAC
Harvey
159Th St. South Holland
John L. Lambert
Chicago ST. Dolton
Phone Dolton
Quinn
Anthony Basile Plumbing
A. R. Harris
Hohman Ave
Carondolet Ave
So.Chi
Theodore Koch
Bergold’s Delicatessen
Geo. Trapp Grocery and Market
H. D. Lentfer