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Newspaper
Potosi Journal
Location
Potosi, Missouri, United States of America
Date
Dec 05, 1900
Page
3
A mild ribbon clerk boasts traveling 5000 miles in a year while another veteran declares 18720 miles yearly. The exchange escalates to a suburban commuter joke as a implyed journey grows into a humorous exaggeration about daily travel and distance.
An exchange questions whether deluxe editions of authors’ works offer real literary advantage. Sageman dismisses any such benefit, while another asks why people pay high prices, suggesting it is for the luxury of owning the item. Boston Courier.
The notices detail a $30,000 gymnasium for Blees military academy at Macon, a $50,000 Catholic parochial school in St. Joseph, and crop and wildlife reports including J M Whitten’s 151 pound pumpkin. Drownings, hunting accidents, courthouse cornerstone ceremony at Mount Vernon, a grand theft attempt in Carondelet, university funding debates, and various legal and punitive actions across Missouri counties are described with names and places such as Boone, Howard, Lawrence, Jefferson, and Clay counties.
Engineering notes describe Capt. Lewis Davis of Liverpool inventing a cap nut lock to prevent blade loss at sea. The report cites other era tech feats including a German method for large high speed balance wheels and a giant Mississippi raft project. Also notes Yellowstone geysers not endangered, countering a French article.
Isaac Brock of McLennan County Texas aged 111 credits Peruna for health and longevity. He describes catarrh as the common cause of coughs colds and bowel trouble and endorses Dr Hartman’s Peruna as a reliable remedy. The notice includes a testimonial and a free book offer from The Peruna Medicine Co. Columbus Ohio.
A lighthearted line notes women spreading an old red shawl over a sofa and placing a red shaded candle nearby to create an oriental corner, as cited by the Atchison Globe.
A Grain-O advertisement claims the product made from pure grains can replace coffee. It quotes Aede praising Grain-O after a week of use and notes benefits for both children and adults. Packages sell for 15c and 25c at grocers.
A brief quoted exchange describes the country as lovely, comparing its appearance to a landscape painted by a master artist, as cited in the Indianapolis Journal.
A garbled ad column touts Cascarets Candy Cathartic as a natural cure for wide-ranging ailments from headaches to cancer, promising easy movements at 10 cents and warning against imitations. It references a quip about patriotism and includes a spoof note about Grove's Camu Toxic with a no cure no pay line and fragmented dialogue.
An odd courtroom exchange reveals a child almost choking on a safety pin. The judge notes the incident as a curious accident highlighting a near miss in household safety.
A cryptic quote from the Philadelphia Bulletin remarks that a person who hides his ignorance from others may actually know more than some who presume knowledge. The line plays on perception and wisdom.
Excursion sleepers depart from St Louis via Katy Flyer every Tuesday at 8 16 p m for San Antonio Los Angeles and San Francisco. Weekly excursioners leave Kansas City via the M K T Ry every Saturday at 9 05 p m for the same trio of western cities. A Chicago Daily News note mentions an artist on a Biblical history project attempting Rebecca at the well but failing to draw the water.
A collage of humorous quips and ads highlights Jell-O as a quick dessert, cures for colds, cigar judgments, and Beeman's Pepsin Gum. The page mixes jokes, brand mentions from Detroit Journal and Syracuse Herald, with a note on the safe bet of the alphabet from Chicago News, all in retro newspaper tone.
Uncle Reuben from a farm in Egypt complains that city horse shows lack hair. He criticizes the horses for bald tails and the spectators, young men, and big-name figures for being clean shaven. He laments fashion trends and jokes about mustaches and hairless heads.
Near a break down at the turn of the century Mrs Henriette Olberg of Albert Lea Minnesota a former judge and exhibit head at the Chicago World's Fair and Omaha Exposition credits Dodd s Kidney Pills with restoring her health after travel a poor diet and water quality She reports immediate and lasting relief after using three boxes and calls the pills a weak women s best friend All dealers sell at 50 cents a box
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