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This newspaper page contains 16 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Newberg Graphic
Location
Newberg, Oregon, United States of America
Date
Oct 19, 1911
Page
3
A humorous critique of baseball as a year round national sport with wry observations on players magnates commissions and fan antics. The piece jokes that contracts and newspapers decide seasons and coins the idea that baseball is driven by reporters and money rather than pure sport.
A historical note on the persistence of stereotypes about Englishmen's garments and tails. The piece cites Bale and Edward VI era beliefs that Europeans mocked Becket riding past Canterbury, linking myths to social satire and xenophobic humor.
A passage recalls satirical claims that England and its descendants were cursed for cutting off the ass’s tail. Competing versions place the curse on St Augustine and Dorsetshire, reflecting medieval jest and slander abroad.
A witness famed for avoiding opinions balks at assessing the defendant’s character. The lawyer fails to elicit a direct reply, and the judge presses for a straight answer. The witness, Nebipehane, admits uncertainty saying he sometimes thinks good, sometimes bad, never able to decide.
An eccentric old farmer in a western English district faces magistrates for cattle straying. During a prior hearing his quip about guilt to the chairman invokes laughter, as he answers the plea question with a playful line about being a regular customer.
The excerpt contemplates fading attraction and affection as a person ages. It contrasts diminishing body appeal with enduring but rarer friendship and mutual love, suggesting true wealth comes from giving and receiving affection even as one nears death.
The article discusses the risks to U S trademarks when exporting to foreign countries. It notes that ownership can lie with local registrants and outlines steps to register marks before shipments. It warns of protection gaps in places like Argentina and emphasizes choosing memorable marks while avoiding sacred symbols in the Far East.
The text notes gloves are ancient tools with relics found in early dwellings. It mentions Roman use as decorative dress items and references Greek practices, indicating long standing cultural roles for gloves.
A large man in the front row commands the audience to sit as panic erupts in a theater. He proclaims there is no danger and exits to demonstrate safety. His quick action halts the stampede and earns him praise for presence of mind.
Across the dumb waiter shaft a smell of alcohol brings scrutiny on the temperance lecturer. She explains she was cleaning a new five dollar bill by dousing it with alcohol to reduce crackle and save on postage, denying any wrongdoing.
A customer questions if today's bread is fresh while the salesgirl confirms. The scene from Boston Transcript humorously highlights miscommunication over yesterday's bread versus today.
The article traces how the date line is not a straight 180 degree meridian but shifts around Siberia and the Aleutian chain. It explains Alaska’s sale and statehood altering the line, notes crossings from east to west lose a day while west to east repeat one, and follows the line from pole to pole with key island passages.
A report notes a dispute within the London Athenaeum club over adherence to strict social rules. The article highlights tensions surrounding propriety and conduct among members in a formal club setting.
A quotation from John Stuart Mill argues that the paramount end for an individual is noble character. It holds that abundance of virtue improves both everyday happiness and the higher aim of elevating life beyond mere puerility.
In old Edinburgh, a daily noon custom saw a man stroll through the Tee portion with a large shin bone of beef His cry offered three stirs and a wallop for a bawbee The housewives simmered vegetables for soup and gladly paid for the bone’s final flourish believed to flavor the stew.
A quirky recipe circulates from Fur News claiming Bill Crozer of Charleston Lake Ontario for fifty two years offers a loon cooking method. The steps describe simmering the bird in water overnight then adding a grindstone until it can be forked, a clearly fictional procedure.
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