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Newberg Graphic in Newberg, Oregon

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This newspaper page contains 23 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.

Newspaper

Newberg Graphic

Location

Newberg, Oregon, United States of America

Date

Dec 07, 1905

Page

7

Peruna Praised Across the Nation for Catarrh Remedy

Letters pouring in from every state testifying to Peruna’s merits as a catarrh remedy flood Dr. Hartman’s office. From ex governors to laborers, officials, editors, and preachers acclaim Peruna as essential for health, with the governor noting no need for other ailments. Free Peruna Almanac offered for 1906.

Capitol Peruna Atlantic Pacific Hartman Statesman Etter Oregon Bene Generar & Onsaes Dr. Hartman

Tainted Tin

A terse exchange with St Peter reveals a test for entry to hell. The applicant recalls honest behavior but is asked for the origin of his wealth rather than past deeds. The joke hinges on awaiting Rockefeller and the need for an itemized accounting of how wealth was acquired.

St Peter Rockefeller Houston Post

Cook Book Cover Provokes Husband Theatrics In Store Scene

A bookstore clerk entices a married woman with a so called novel that appears to be a cookbook. The prospective customer questions the concept while the clerk claims the book will amuse husbands and prompt them to buy a new hat.

Good Advice to a Tramp Weathered Winter Scene

A chilly autumn night finds a tramp with 9 cents seeking a bed. He is advised by a stranger to ask the gentleman he will sleep with for one more penny. The advisee keeps asking for help, while a cold Minneapolis Journal tone frames the encounter.

Minneapolis Journal

Porterage and cabbage in a British officer expense list

A British officer listed Porter, twopence in a government service expense. He was told refreshments not chargeable, then that it was a carrier fee. Replied with porterage. When taking a hansom he wrote Cabbage, 2 shillings.

War Office Philadelphia Public Ledger

Three words to strike from the dictionary, says a wandering philosopher

A traveling thinker sips coffee and declares honesty satisfaction and if as three words worth striking from the dictionary. He argues honesty is never absolute, satisfaction is never complete, and if invites endless desire or doubt.

Quack Doctor Paralyzed by Coroner’s Question

A coroner sternly questioned a quack doctor after a patient died from his treatment. When asked what he gave, the doctor said ipecacuanha. The coroner dryly retorted that it was as safe as the aurora borealis, noting that was exactly what he planned to administer before the death.

Humorous Bits From The Day’s Laughing Pages

A collage of jokes and cartoons from late 19th and early 20th century magazines. The items include quips about mining, mistaken identities, price jokes, puns on board bills, and humorous exchanges about doctors, beggars, and teachers. Several named periodical voices surface in short, punchy lines.

No proper thing for a man to have a backbone

A witty remark notes that a backbone is jointed and that egotists prefer self care with an "I" doctor. The line satirizes vanity and the idea of consulting oneself over seeking aid from others.

Mouse in the Bread Pan Prank Sweeps Household Into Laughter

A prominent politician’s wife, famed for domestic skill and bread making, faced a kitchen mishap when her son cried a mouse was in the bread pan. She asked if he removed it, and he replied he added the cat to chase the nuisance, prompting humorous relief.

New York Times

Christian Science Church Growth Compared to Popular Cereals

The piece notes about 400 Christian Science churches in the United States with around 100000 adherents. It cites founder Mrs. Eddy saying the church is rapidly expanding in popularity, drawing a parallel to Pillsbury’s Vitos cereal in public appeal.

Christian Science United States Rs. Eddy Pillsbury

Beggars in London Face Arrests and High Sums

London beggars number about 4,000 earning an estimated 1.5 million dollars annually. In the previous year 1,925 were arrested for begging and over 1,500 were sentenced to one week to three months in prison. Some possess large sums of money and even bank books showing sizable deposits.

London

Hall's Catarrh Cure Promoted By Cheney Company

An advertisement warns against mercury based remedies for catarrh and promotes Hall's Catarrh Cure by F. J. Cheney & Co of Toledo Ohio. It states the product contains no mercury and is taken internally to affect blood and mucous surfaces. The price is listed as 75 cents per bottle with accompanying Hall's Family Pills noted as best.

IFT Specific CO Atlanta Gio Hall F. J. Cheney & Co Toledo Ohio

Hamlet lookalike stranded with ghostly hunger

A Ham let troupe lies twenty miles from a farm as a tramp asks if the lead performer is Hamlet. He confirms and jokes that ghosts don’t get hungry, adding a darkly humorous twist to the barnstorming encounter.

Hamlet Columbus Dispatch

Permanently Cured Nervousness Claims Ad

An advertisement touts Dr. Kline's Great Nerve remedy as permanently curing nervousness after one day's use. It invites readers to request a free treatise and lists H. Kline, Ltd. contact in Philadelphia.

Dr. Kline H. Kline, Ltd Arch St. Phia, Pe

Big Hay Crop Recalled In Lincoln Tale From Illinois

A Detroit News reader quotes Kansas papers recalling Lincoln’s hay crop story. The veteran storyteller notes hay stacked on the ground and the rest stored in the barn as a remedy and rural practice during teething era.

Kansas Lincoln Illinois Detroit News

Day to Be Remembered

Miss Passay recalls her thirtieth birthday with a dramatic exchange quoted from the Philadelphia Ledger. Miss Pert responds that something dreadful must have happened to explain the memory, highlighting a humorous reflection on age and memory.

Miss Passay Miss Pert Philadelphia Ledger

Cable Tolls to Japan in Wartime News

Cable tolls to Japan cost 1.76 dollars per word as war news pours in. With conflict raging in the Far East, cables stay busy day and night to feed the public’s appetite for updates with their Pillabury’s Vitos breakfast.

Japan Far East

A New One Needed

A playful exchange about age and appearance. Mrs Naggett remarks on age tied to looks while Mr Naggett deflects witty comments about extravagant ideas. The scene showcases humorous banter from Philadelphia in a domestic setting.

Mr. Nagget

It Was No Use

Dialogue from Cleveland Leader excerpt shows Dick inviting Jack to walk, Jack delaying to finish a letter to his father, and Jack revealing he is broke, signaling a light local humor moment.

Jack Old Man Cleveland

Submarine Cables and Global Trade Reach

The world has 376 submarine cables totaling 178 919 miles. Governments own about 25 000 miles while private parties hold the rest. Each day these cables carry orders from every land for Pillsbury Vitose an all day food.

Jawback Wins Life Insurance Plot

In a Cleveland Leader prose snippet Mr Jawback plans a life insurance policy while Mrs Jawback warns it is graft. He asks what would happen if he died and she replies she would marry again if his life were insured for a large sum.

Jawback Cleveland

Marriage proposals via Northwest social registry

A fragmented ad offers marriage matching for desirable partners in the Northwest. Prospective clients are instructed to write to a Portland address with a Decem fairim Register and Box 68 for details and pricing.

Northwest Portland Oregon

Also Mentioned on This Page

State of Oregon Peruna Medicine Co Columbus W. M. Lord Adam Schn Evansville Ind Jackopolinsky Romanoffopolotovsky Puck Willie Bronco Bill Tompkins Grizzly Pete Dhe Business College Billy Bill Mobherly Monitor The Indian Bureau Pat Brother Jones Pearly Gates Mrs. Gabble Query Lippincott’s Harold America John Lucky Ghost St. Jacobs Oil Price Jaques Mfg. CO Chicago Ee Reierson Machinery CO Feot Morrison Street Oregzon Park and Washington School of Quality A. P. Armstrong LL. B Around the Tower A. J. Tower CO Boston U.S Tower Canadian Co., Limited Toronto Canada International Ctionary Fats de Prasetos Ww. ‘of Education St. Louis Webster's Collegiate Dictionary Freak C. Merriam CO Springfield, Mass C. Gee Chinese Medicine CO First St Cer Morrises Portland, Oregon Eilers Piano House United Staes Pacific Coast Atyler Washi Street Sprague Ave Post St Spokane, Wash Market Street San Francisco Cal Pau W. A. Wise T. P. Wise Wise Bros. Dentists Falling Hide Third Washington Sta Main Dee Putnam
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