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New Oxford Item in New Oxford, Pennsylvania

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Articles on This Page

This newspaper page contains 31 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.

Newspaper

New Oxford Item

Location

New Oxford, Pennsylvania, United States of America

Date

Jun 26, 1913

Page

1

Hidden Fortune Restores Hope At Glenville Farm

In Glenville, Ethel Moore helps John Davis with a needed loan and discovers a tin box under a toppled cupola containing her late uncle’s missing fortune. William Moore, long disillusioned, is revived by the windfall and plans to renovate the old homestead for his daughter's wedding.

Florence L. Henderson John Davis Glenville Ethel Moore Ethel William Moore Robert Robert Moore William Davis John

A Woman Finds Hope After Loss and a New Love

Ethel Moore supports her father William Moore after his failed investment and his wife’s death. She learns dressmaking and millinery, awaits a distant wedding with Archie Winston, and helps with cleanup after a storm. John Davis offers to work tidying yard debris for fifty cents.

William Moore Ethel Archie Winston Archie Robert John Davis Pyle Miss

Broke It to Him Gently Joke on Christopher’s Propinquity

Lulu McStubbins discovers after marriage that her husband Christopher is not teetotal, and her father, Papa McStubbins, learns the word propinquity means nearness and puns on close and tight. The piece ends with London Fun’s lighthearted take on a domestic misunderstanding.

Lulu McStubbins Papa McStubbins Christopher

Not Unnatural Conclusion

A London lady visiting New York attends a turkey trot at a sanctuary hosted by her hostess. Only one couple on the floor, but the dancers trotted in the approved style. The hostess points out the dance as the real turkey trot. The English guest replies she cannot object but jokes she will marry the lady.

London New York

Grandfather's disgust at baby named Hazel

A christening scene shows the grandfather puzzled by the father's answer Hazel as the baby's name. He laments naming a daughter after a nut with saints' calendar full of girl names. The priest asks for the name and the exchange ends with the grandfather's exasperation.

Hazel Saturday Evening Post

His Willing Tribute by a Reluctant Applicant

A donor asks a judge for a testimonial on life insurance with a company. The judge recalls an agent who harassed him for six weeks, pressing him to sign an application to end the pursuit.

Lfe

The Heiress Seeks Bribe From The Chap

The Chap refuses to marry the Heiress unless she pays a bribe of two hundred thousand. He says nothing will restore the loss but money, framing a cynical exchange as a mock proposal.

London Dinner Scene Hints at Jail Stay for Guest

In a London dining room a noblewoman orders the butler Dobson to ensure Mrs. Busby-Burnem receives ample portions, noting her extraordinary appetite. A whispered line suggests the guest is preparing for a lengthy jail stay.

London Cleveland Plain Dealer

Mother urges daughter to marry the druggist

A mother bluntly suggests her daughter marry the young druggist to become a good husband. The daughter resists choosing a duke or gentleman but finally agrees to look at the druggist with kinder eyes.

Raffles

Conversation Between Mrs Farmer And Weary Willie

A humorous exchange where Mrs. Farmer asks what would be done if she provides a meal and Weary Willie replies by offering to have the baby named after him. The aunt of the child is present in the rural setting.

Mrs. Farmer Willie

Tragedies Told In Headlines of a Nightly Page

A collection of comical misfortunes is shown in old headlines. A husband washes dishes and shatters china. A candidate for initiation disrupts a lodge ceremony. A nervous ballplayer loses a game with his sweetheart in the stands. A impulsive wedding unites a man with a widow and seven children. A man who vows to quit smoking wins a cigar prize.

Impressive Mrs Peckum Styled by Puck Quip

A quip from Puck notes Mrs Peckum as a strong minded woman who reportedly commands a large salary through her husband’s earnings, illustrating a sharp social circle remark about gender and wealth.

Retirement climber tests poets claim in suburban tree climb

A retired businessman in the suburbs climbs trees to test a poet’s claim that there are no birds in last year’s nests. He questions the trust placed in poetry while seeking firsthand proof of nature.

An 80-Year-Old Declares He Takes No Chances

In London Punch a humorous exchange features William aged eighty saying he is done with smoking and plans to avoid risk, while the Genial Squire remarks on age between eighty and ninety as a “tickling part of a man's life” and jokes about tobacco.

William London Bill Watson Arry Thompson Bacca

Endless Fight over a Barber and a Hair Tonic Offer

Dialogue sketches a long running city barber dispute with a punch line about a bottle of hair tonic. The speakers reveal regret over the barber’s departure and a decision to seek a new barber, ending the quarrel reframed as a battle.

Weary Willie’s Pie Sparks Friendly Bargain at Fair

A readers’ pie quarrel turns into a light village moment as Mrs Jones offers a dollar for a bite while a quip about the pie’s baker’s kin raises a humorous exchange.

Willie

A Second Edison In My Farms Hire Employed Man

Farmer claims a hired man is a great inventor calling him a second Edison. The city boarder asks what he invents and the farmer replies with a comical Petrified motion.

Edison

Value of the Lingo Delivers a Witty Language Exchange

In a light exchange the speaker notes learning French helps avoid high costs in Paris. A witty remark adds that language alone may not convince others one is French, but can hint at being Russian or Spaniard instead.

Paris

Bit at Sea Hats Spark Witty Exchange

Mrs Jokesmith jokes with her husband about boat shaped hats this season. He quips he will skip his operation as a pun.

Hubby

Occasional Visitors and the Notable Housekeeper

A short anecdote from Youth's Companion describes a housekeeper claiming she never has any flies. A timid visitor insists seeing flies in the dining-room, but the aunt dismisses them as neighbors' flies that drift in occasionally, while affirming they never have any of their own.

Augusta

Man’s Best Friend Guards Railways and Paris Police Dogs

A report on trained dogs guarding railways and aiding Paris police. Dogs deter sabotage and watch bridges and boats on the Seine. They accompany prisoners, defend their master, and resist bribes with training stressing honesty and loyalty. A London Bystander humor piece closes with a roadside dialogue about directions and local fare.

Nnes Larissa Europe Paris Seine

Stamp-Printing Machine to Save Government Millions

A new stamp printing apparatus designed by Benjamin R. Stickney will produce a mile of stamps every five minutes and 12,000 stamps per minute. It is expected to cut production costs by 57 percent and, with higher demand, enable the bureau of engraving and printing to manufacture many more millions daily, saving several million dollars over years.

Benjamin R. Stickney Bureau of Engraving and Printing

The Drummer's Tender Heart

A commercial traveler recounts sending the governor a telegram of sympathy after hearing of a disastrous fire. He defends the half crown telegram as a thoughtful act, noting he charged it to expenses, illustrating economy and kindness in a humorous tale.

Puck Quip on Courtesy in Cross Examination

A mocked exchange recalls a witness recalling a courteous cross examination by a lawyer. The Lawyer questions whether the testimony was material, prompting a wry comment from Puck about the trial.

Wise Law Refuted by Mrs Vastlee Rich

A satirical exchange mocks political influence and cash buying power. Vastlee Rich declares politics prove money can buy the oldest organization, Life, countered sentimentally by Longfellow’s quote on valued associations.

Vastlee Rich Longfellow

He Knew Better in a Boilin Alley Pin Pick-Up Tale

Kirst Urchin-Dey and Second Urchin-Nothin’ discuss luck from pin picking in a boilin' alley. The narrator says they picked up pins for three weeks, then fatigue and fear followed a fried outcome. The fragment hints at superstition and misfortune tied to a risky habit.

Castoria Ad Urges Careful Bottle Examination

An advertisement stresses mothers examine every Castoria bottle for the signature and notes the product has been in use for over 30 years. It states Castoria is a safe remedy for infants and children and invites children to cry for Fletcher's Castoria.

Fletcher

Not Always Palatable Truths From a Hooded Quote

A collation notes the proverb Truth is at the bottom of a well and laments widespread contamination of well water. The piece cites irony that hard truths and polluted wells coalesce, signaling skepticism toward public assurances.

Capucine Headache Remedy Ad Promises Fast Relief

An ad promotes Hicks Capucine a liquid headache remedy claiming immediate effect and prevention for nervous headaches. It offers a money back satisfaction guarantee and lists prices 10c 36c with a note to purchase at medicine stores.

Eclectic Doctor or Teetotaler A Light Exchange

A light exchange questions if the doctor is eclectic in practice and the reply confirms he is a teetotaler. The dialogue paints a humorous contrast between medical breadth and abstinence.

Experience of Motherhood Promoted by Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound

The article discusses the challenges of motherhood and the need for preparation. It extols Lydia E. Pinkham’s Vegetable Compound as a tonic for the female body and nerve health. It encourages women to seek personal advice from the Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine Co with confidential responses from a woman.

Lydia E. Pinkham Lydia E. Pinkham Medicine Co Lynn Mass

Also Mentioned on This Page

Daughter Bears Zumot Acumenr Zumota French Pattern Co Nicollet Minneapolis Nina Hartford M.U0 Co Martel Parkersburg W.V Moyer Distributing Co Summit Ben Adutts Morris Specialty Vo Norwalk Conn Demusion Trust Company Dominion Trust Company Canada Regeats Massachusetts Vermont Rhode Island Maine New Hampshire Drakox British Canadian Securities, Limited Dominion Trust Building Vancouver British Columbia
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