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Newspaper
New Harmony Register
Location
New Harmony, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Sep 22, 1882
Page
3
A collection of fruit ice and ice cream recipes including orange water ice peach ice cream raspberry juice ice cream currant raspberry mix lemon cream coffee cream cacao chocolate vanilla and strawberry vanilla blends with steps on cream, sugar, eggs, and freezing. Many recipes specify heating stirring straining and sieving before the freezer.
Dio Lewis argues hair loss stems from chronic head coverings. He claims hats heat the scalp, weaken hair glands, and cause baldness, while breathable hats with holes supposedly avert hair loss and headaches. He jokes about silk hats with holes and warns against improper nap direction.
The steel plow-share revolutionized farming by lightening labor and increasing wealth. Darwin showed worms quietly perform similar soil work on a smaller scale, breaking up the soil and aiding crops.
The passage argues that superficial mold, though despised, recurs in cycles and should be seen as a valuable ally by farmers. It contends that effects are constant and progressive, with the mold passing through soil and organisms like worms in cycles every few years.
A dated collection of humorous snippets and quips. The item parodies social chatter with muddled syntax, cartoonish exchanges, and wry cultural snapshots. It teases manners, fashion, and old-time slang through short, pointed lines.
A Times correspondent notes diet can ease dyspepsia with soft egg beefsteak and baked potatoes plus Dr. Guggott’s Yellow Dock and Sarsaparilla as a tonic. A Yorkie being sold in a box draws a bid scene, the handler demanding fifty dollars while a buyer offers ten, the seller jeering at the insult.
An early 1900s ad razzes remedies by Dr Pierce and World’s Dispensary items, touting Golden Medical Discovery and Little Liver Pills. It mocks cures, promotes Pellets, and features a quip about cat painting and fancy work while noting a Nebraska woman’s tale and a plea for medical books.
An advertisement extols PutnamM s painless corns extractor claiming no discomfort no caustic use and no blood. It also includes testimonials for Burdock Blood Bitters and a humorous exchange about rain and attending events implying idle chatter and common sayings.
An 1881 feature notes a year of kidney disease pain relieved by Safe Kidney and Liver. The muddled text references a teacher and a donkey joke, plus commentary on Hops and Malt Bitters and medical authorities criticizing certain remedies for constipation and general ailments.
A brief satirical snippet echoes an old man named Si praising Florida climate while joking about alligators. The dialogue contrasts weather friendly to New Year heat with gator danger, ending with a quip on honesty and danger in the alligator’s mouth.
The Cincinnati Commercial argues that the ideal boiled potato, hot and skinless, surpasses sliced, fried, or mashed forms and should be eaten plain with salt and butter. It criticizes alternate preparations as inferior and quips about a wedding description misprint involving shoes compared to ferry boats.
A jumble of old advertisements and quips sells various goods and remedies. Mentions Rough on Ears pest control, a mule and a dog, a beef tonic, a deodorized extract, teething syrup, harness oil, and other patent medicines. Contains many product names and sensational claims.
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