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This newspaper page contains 12 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
New Harmony Register
Location
New Harmony, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Nov 11, 1887
Page
3
A dialect piece argues some people are chronic fault finders and kickers. It cites examples from Arkansaw Traveler and Queen Victoria to claim quiet labor reduces grumbling. The prose praises self restraint and focus on one’s own deeds over judging others.
The American Analyst argues longevity hinges on blending old simple habits with modern knowledge. Regular sleep, daytime repose, open-air activity, and disciplined meals are essential. Avoid heavy dinners, excess alcohol, and overwork to prevent rusting out and false starts toward a hundred.
A humorous exchange compares a clerk who once kept six and a quarter cents from change to Abraham Lincoln. The clerk later walked four miles at night to repay the money and was arrested for breach of promise, as reported by the Bismarck Tribune.
A frantic family man bursts into a drug store asking for a prescription to be filled immediately. The clerk warns of ingredient shortages while the man reads a list his wife handed him including safety pins nutmegs butter vinegar flannel needles and Rough on Rats. Burdette notes Jane Nemesis, the avenger, watches the man closely.
In a paper presented to the Seismological Society of Japan Prof Milne described animal signs preceding quakes. Ponies pranced before a shock in January and pheasants screamed while frogs ceased croaking. Geese swine and dogs showed clear alerts though effects vary with volcanic gases.
Prof. F. E. Boynton notes in Popular Science Monthly that a twenty mile wide region where North Carolina South Carolina and Georgia meet contains more diverse and rare lands than any other same area in the United States.
In Elba Minnesota a man sold a farm for two thousand dollars and hid the money in his house. A few days later while his wife fetched water a thief stole the money and the house was set ablaze and burned to the ground.
A ministerial looking man questions a sailor on the dock about habits. The sailor admits occasional drinking, gambling after voyages, and yes he chews tobacco. The exchange ends with the sailor agreeing to take a chew, spoken in a rough nautical cadence.
Burdette notes doubt about literary claims by Mar Ryatt and Rider Haggard. He mocks the idea of a Pacha having tales and a lion with three tails, arguing such tales are improbable outside a dime museum.
An Austin gentleman and Gus De Smith discuss Austin heat versus Galveston chill with a humorous exchange about ninety degrees. The piece then touts Hostetter's Stomach Bitters as a cure for varied ailments linked to malarial or nervous debility, followed by a vignette about Governor Honest John Blank and his brother William, who jokes of shooting the horse during a wild ride.
A fragmented advertorial page promotes Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription for female complaints and Scott's Emulsion for weight gain and illness, alongside Brown's Bronchazan Trocites and Wisconsin Central Line rail service. It mentions a clergyman cured of catarrh and offers a free recipe from Prof. J A Lawrence for readers seeking relief.
An old advertisement snippet touts Dr Pierce's Pleasant Purgative Pellets for prompt effective relief without unpleasant after effects. It promotes Swayne's Ointment for itching moistures piles and skin ulcers and notes Swayne's Smogat available from druggists or by mail.
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