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This newspaper page contains 8 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Muscatine Journal
Location
Muscatine, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Dec 13, 1909
Page
18
A man worries his wife may be wooed away as he notices her affectionate clinging. Sherlock Holmes jokes that Christmas brings a diamond ring for every wife, and the pair realize the season prompts gifts. The story pivots on holiday humor and a hopeful note.
A man tells how a former cook’s demands for gifts intensified around Christmas, culminating in her death after a streetcar accident. He boasts of saving 87,500 and imagines a luxury auto, while an auditor reacts with shock at the exchange.
The poem contrasts a child's imagined gifts with a wink at Santa Claus and the cash economy. A boy longs for knives, engines, rifles, boots, skates, a dog or goat, a diamond pin, sweets, fruit, a flying machine, and more, then wakes to a doughnut in the sock. Joe Kerr notes Santa may be myth but cash is real.
Mrs Smith asks about Christmas shopping while Mrs Jones replies she continues her Christmas buying with no fuss. The exchange reflects a light holiday chat about preparation and pacing.
A festive public note urges restraint in crowded spaces during the Christmas season. It reminds readers others share the public space with license to be present and encourages calm, broad holiday spirit over temper.
A humorous verse exchanges lines from many voices about the Christmas turkey. Each speaker declares the bird essential for the holiday meal, with plans to catch or keep the turkey, culminating in a collective insistence that no Christmas is complete without it.
Mr Shortcash recalls a Christmas memory involving buying a plane for his wife on an installment plan and facing several years of payments, with Mr Smithson noting the detail.
A comic tale sees a young man seeking advice on affording Christmas for his love. The Sage suggests a laundry delivery mix up as the gift excuse, proposing the weekly laundry and a Chinaman’s sparkling gift as a safe ruse. The moral: clever, humorous problem solving.
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