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Newspaper
Mooresville Times
Location
Mooresville, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Oct 16, 1908
Page
6
A collection of humorous items and stray notes from across the country. Jests about hats, baby carriages as savings banks, bread lightness, and a New Jersey judge allowing swearing at home amid broader vignettes on marriage, suffragettes, and a Mexican ambassador bicycle mishap.
A French expert claims the aeroplane’s broken wing is like a punctured car tire, noting the key difference that a tire burst leaves the vehicle grounded while an airborne wing failure involves flight loss.
The passage notes Chicago is 75 years old and still looks youthful. It adds she will be equally fresh when she is twice her current age, implying lasting vitality beyond age.
West New York New Jersey struggles with funds to feed the fire department horses and still owes for the animals. The town may be placed under receivership due to the mounting debt and cash shortage.
The text notes a presidential election this fall alongside thirty three states choosing governors. It argues for concentrating elections to maximize voter participation and election excitement.
A physician notes that only a mono maniac can dwell on one subject for five minutes while many politicians have fixed on an office since reaching voting age. The remark contrasts clinical focus with political fixation across public life.
A growing impression suggests a Chicago professor is judged a success by his audience only if he speaks in ways that sound nonsensical to the average intellect, prompting discussion about communication and intellect standards.
A ninety year old man in Connecticut killed himself, citing fear of turning one hundred as the reason. The report notes some people fear personal habits like smoking or drinking, a topic appearing in Sunday papers.
Humane Officer Ware reports 16,425 Toledo women beaten by husbands over fifteen years. Leader cites Cleveland figures showing three times as many women given diamond rings and sealskin coats in the same period.
The flagpole ball on a proposed New York insurance building would rise about twice the height of the Washington Monument and 74 feet above the Eiffel Tower. The building itself would stand at 909 feet or more, over four times the height of the Bunker Hill monument.
A grand naval review is proposed to honor the returning battleship fleet, its officers and crew, a display seen as fitting for the American name. Only the chronic grouch may oppose the plan.
The London medical officer reported a Massachusetts pig carcass marked U S Inspected showed acute pleurisy and a fore quarter of frozen beef with the same mark was diseased. Scrap meat in boxes also marked contained diseased meat and boric acid. He notes inspection is better than before.
A fire Tuesday in Arlington caused eight thousand dollars in damage and is believed caused by an incendiary. Three year old La vonne Butts of Rushville died after playing with matches. The article notes additional cases of children dying in barn fires and a large demonstration in Peru marked by a courthouse cornerstone ceremony.
Ed Messman returns to Kokomo after a balloon ascent at North Manchester where he felled 1,000 feet. He declares he is finished with life as an aeronaut.
Mrs. Sylvester Weikart of Fort Wayne suffered fatal burns when a gasoline explosion ignited fire at her residence, leaving the home partially destroyed and investigators examining the scene.
Five year old John Norris of Alexandria was killed when a dispute over a twenty two caliber rifle led to an accidental discharge by an older brother during a rough play.
Roy Massena of Indianapolis was acquitted in Kosciusko Circuit Court on the embezzlement charge of 1500 dollars while serving as deputy county treasurer. He had stood trial for the alleged theft, and the court cleared him of the accusation.
William Favorite aged 28 was sentenced to life in prison at Huntington for assaulting an 11 year old girl. The jury was out ten minutes.
Mrs. Margaret E. Dodd of Evansville has filed for divorce claiming her husband set their home on fire several years ago.
Bloomington investigators report three fourths of officers over the last decade are short in accounts. The missing total exceeds $12,000 and authorities say the discrepancy is under review.
Republican presidential candidate W. H. Taft will tour Indiana by special train for three days in October. The trip is scheduled for October 22 23 and 24 with stops across the state to campaign.
During the current term at Paoli the Good Citizens' League of French Sick began twenty eight prosecutions against druggists and others for violations of liquor and gaming laws.
The fourth annual State corn show will be held by the Indiana Corn Growers Association at Purdue University January 11 to 16, 1909. Premiums to be offered are many and large.
Cass Circuit Court Judge John S. Larry dismissed claims that Jonathan Isler caused the death of George O. Huffman’s wife by malicious fright. Huffman, of Bunker Hill, had sued Isler of Peru for damages.
A fragment from a stump blasted during street work in West Lafayette struck Mrs Ephraim Coleman in her yard and killed her instantly. The accident occurred during excavation for street improvement work and left the area under investigation.
Evansville jury awards Mrs Mary Morris two thousand dollars after she accused Jeffersonville’s wealthy citizen Robert Kempf of stealing her chickens. The case centers on a slander claim arising from the dispute over poultry.
The party schedules two events with speeches by gubernatorial candidate Thomas R. Marshall and Ohio’s John J. Lentz. The first gathering arrives October 16 in Greenfield, followed by a Wanatah rally the next day.
A log cabin at the Eaton agricultural and stock fair recreates pioneer life with two Delaware County women dressed as their younger selves spinning and weaving on old fashioned wheels. Every detail of cabin life is carried out.
Charles Wolf, a gravel road construction worker near Decatur, beat his employer Jacob Mangold to death with a beam after anger over a reprimand. The fatal assault occurred on the work site in the western area near Decatur.
R. D. Fleming of Ft Wayne and Charles Jones of Connersville fought a duel when Fleming attempted to arrest Jones for violating state game laws. Both were shot, but injuries are not serious.
In Goshen editors from Cromwell, Wolf Lake, Milford, Pierceton and others gathered to organize against county seat papers allegedly taking all legal advertising. Attendees included L. M. Parrish R. B. Woods W. J. Grove and J. W. Harris.
The Hazleton Town Council approved an ordinance targeting careless drivers who endanger residents by street racing. Automobiles may not exceed eight miles per hour within corporate limits and must horn at least twenty times per minute.
Advices from Indiana sections indicate the state corn crop will be much better than expected due to a prolonged drought. Southern Indiana harvest is under way with yields from forty to eighty bushels per acre. Northern areas suffered frost damage but should still yield well with excellent quality.
Mrs. Sarah Kelley two miles northwest of Needham in Brown county found a door notice threatening violence and vowing to whip her. The same night unknown persons visited the house and nearly emptied it of furniture while she was away, consistent with past Whitecap decrees in the region.
W. W. Hatch of Hatch & Sons warns northern Indiana counties face a road crisis as heavy high speed cars damage old gravel highways. Crushed stone with binder seems best, but binders are too costly. interlocking irregular stones wear out brick and other materials quickly.
Indiana keeper Mary Stubbs Moore reports 288 Belgian draft horses worth 262 285 total. Harness horses show standard bred trotting animals valued at 661 720 overall with averages: under one year 120 75, over one and under four years 177, and over three years 256 12.
Listings describe multiple skirt models with seven-gored designs in round or ankle lengths. Fabrics include serge cheviot mohair tweed and broadcloth with features such as button front closures left side openings and inset sheath panels. Sizes range 22 to 36 waist 22 to 34 for most styles.
Fashion editor at 400 Century Building Indianapolis asks for ten cents and requests Paris Pattern No. Size Address Name for an 18x18 inch tulip centerpiece suitable for solid and outline embroidery.
A waiter on a German train serves a tin Eiffel tower lunch box with soup fish chicken dessert and Rhine wine hidden in stacked compartments. This portable meal costs three marks and becomes popular at mid journey stops, a curious indulgence described by a Leipzig correspondent of the New York World.
Comic exchange between Green and White about Brown's habit of laughing at his own jokes. Brown is described as laughing at listeners who enjoy them, highlighting contrasted reactions among characters. The piece uses witty banter to critique humor and self-amusement.
Plans reveal Judge Alton B. Parker of New York Governor Johnson of Minnesota and Hoke Smith of Georgia among others set to appear in Indiana as part of the Democratic campaign efforts.
An epidemic of distemper devastates Wayne County horses with more than half affected and many deaths reported, causing widespread concern among farmers and ranchers.
Low water boosts harvests along a 30 mile Indiana stretch of the Wabash River west of Owensville. Merchants claim up to $30,000 in pearls have been taken this season, marking the most profitable period in recent memory for the mussel-gathering industry.
Good corn prospects in Grant County outshine fields in counties south of the Grant line. Reports indicate a notably larger crop expected this season, boosting local farmers and markets amid regional comparisons.
In a sharp exchange, Mulligan dismisses Casey as harmless while Harrigan labels him a sneaky rival. A mock threat follows as the blackguard taunts the speaker, who vows not to tolerate him any longer in this contimporary scene.
A collection of quips, maxims, and humorous observations from the Atchison Globe. Topics include business prosperity, fashion, marriage, gossip, advice to women, frugality, and social propriety, with several quips about demeanor, sobriety, and respectability. The tone imitates a late 19th to early 20th century column of wit and counsel.
The item covers a range of curiosities from whale bone weights and Panama Hats to bank capitalization gaps between Pittsburg and Boston. It notes union efforts to train printers, thoughts on Asiatics in the Transvaal, National City Evangelization Union finances, falcon messenger tests, cattle vaccination, global securities figures, sleep causes, walnut water for worm fishing, a tame rattlesnake, Ponce de Leon’s remains dispute, and gypsy stereotypes.
A humorous Toledo Blade exchange shows a diplomat admonishing a boy about smoking while the boy explains he merely fears his father’s anger over missing an afternoon swim. The quip highlights family dynamics and light social commentary.
A Cleveland Leader excerpt shows a man asking a woman to marry him after their intimate conversation. The dialogue implies strain around commitment and fatigue with their relationship.
In a Chicago News item Timpkins recalls Windig partaking in a linguistic meal yesterday. Simpkins asks for clarification and Timpkins explains that Biffkins forced him to eat his words in a witty exchange.
An actress asks why the author did not write tragedy. He replies he did write one, though critics deemed it a farce. The exchange appears in the Boston Post.
A playful exchange from the Baltimore American uses fruit imagery to describe a couple. The dialogue weighs affection with light humor, noting she is a peach and he the apple of her eye, implying a harmonious pair.
One hundred dollars reward for catarrh cured by Hall's Catarrh Cure. F J Cheney & Co Toledo Ohio. Endorsed by Wormalding Kinnan & Marvin, wholesale druggists Toledo. Cure taken internally. price 75 cents per bottle. Sold by all druggists. Take Hall's Family Pills for constipation.
The line depicts a playful exchange where Leonidas is asked to mind the baby. He quips he minds everyone else at the house and need not treat the infant differently, reflecting a domestic humor tone from the Washington Star.
A brief humorous exchange quotes a Detroit Tribune cartoon line about a man offering a $10 loan for a couple of weeks. The vignette highlights a casual financial favor framed as a light social moment.
Advertises Red Cross Ball Blue as essential laundry aid for clean and fresh clothes and notes its use by grocers.
A light dialogue in a Baltimore American excerpt shows a playful exchange about hair dye as a trivial matter rather than a crucial issue, reflecting everyday humor in the newsroom.
An old advertisement touts Mrs Winslow's Soothing Syrup for children's teeth and wind colic relief claiming pain reduction and inflammation soothing effects. The copy notes a price of 262 cuts per bottle.
A reader quote collection presents Chesterfield aphorisms about brains and business, listing Watts and Dispatch as references to wit and commerce.
An advertisement extols Syrup of Figs and Elixir of Senna as a valued laxative for cleansing and relieving internal organs without debility. It notes the product is pleasant and natural, with components approved by physicians, and urges purchase of the genuine California Fig Syrup Co. offering through leading druggists.
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