Monticello Express Lighthearted Quotes and Snippets
A collection of wry observations from The Monticello Express on social trends and public manners. Jokes about dancing, travel, fashion on a budget, education, labor, automobiles, sports, and daily life peppered with quotable quips and pointed opinions.
London nerve expert links modern dress to female fatalities
A London nerve specialist argues that contemporary fashion endangers women's health and may prove deadly as they strive to stay in style. The remark highlights concerns about restrictive attire and its mental and physical toll on women.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Englishman’s stingy bee invention paves quirky fame
An Englishman introduces a stingless bee concept and jokes that only an itchless woolen undershirt remains to secure lasting fame. The light note highlights a playful innovation sequence and a cheeky wish for a practical improvement.
Cincinnati Woman Warns Of Faultless Man Marriage Risk
A Cincinnati woman says she married a man without a fault, but warns of the trouble awaiting him, hinting at unforeseen complications in their union.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Cincinnati
Canadian Lumberman Weds Woman After Interpreter Aid
A Canadian lumberman marries the girl he wooed through an interpreter, proving that love crosses language barriers. The tale underscores the idea that affection remains universal despite linguistic differences.
West Virginia Girl Stops Train Wreck With Apron
A West Virginia girl flagged a passing train using her apron and helped avert a wreck. The incident shows how practical clothing enabled quick action, implying a hobble skirt would have hindered her efforts.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
West Virginia
London pastor favors flirting in chapel crowds
A London pastor advocates allowing young people to flirt in chapel as attendance rises. The Toledo Blade notes that the worst never happens, implying consequences may still come.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
The
Toledo Blade
Court rules nagging wife beyond reach of law
New York court determines a nagging wife cannot be legally stopped by the courts, while a grouchy husband is similarly protected, highlighting a humorous legal quirk in domestic disputes.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York
Chicago Judge Rules Lem On Flavor Requires Lemon Presence
A Chicago judge held that lem on flavor is not lemon flavor unless it contains lemon. The ruling centers on how a product is described to the ultimate consumer.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Chicago
Man Plans Turkey Rearing on Grasshoppers Near Vandeville
A western man proposes to raise and fatten turkeys on a grasshopper diet. He hints at a turkey trotting stunt to be staged in Vandeville.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Vandeville
Mountain Dwellers More Belligerent Than Plains Folk
Questioning why mountain inhabitants seem more quarrelsome than plains dwellers. Suggests a link to environment and mobility, joking about elevators causing peevishness.
German savant links musicians' character to their instruments
A German savant claims musicians' personalities are shaped by the instruments they play aiming to influence audiences. He then advocates removing the bass drum, arguing orchestras already have enough percussion and knock.
Methead Patent Desired For Safe Railway Frog Release
A writer laments the slow progress of any inventor who can quickly free a man with a foot fastened in a railway frog. The piece critiques the delay in producing a proven release device and urges faster action.
New York Orders Stepless Street Cars for Hobble Skirts
The city issues an order for numbered stepless street cars intended for women in hobble skirts. The remark invites speculation if the ladies will respond by purchasing stepless trains for future ball gowns.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York
French reformer links falling births to car costs
A French reformer argues that high costs of raising a child equals maintaining an automobile. He claims France’s birth rate declined once families faced car and child expenses, implying that childrearing is as costly as owning a car.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Aca
France
Armistice Talks Rejected as Bulgaria Presses War
Paris and Constantinople report Bulgaria refuses armistice terms and demands include Adrianople Scutar Janina and Tchatalja lines. Nazim Pasha ordered to resume operations amid cholera and mounting Turkish casualties. French note holds Turkey responsible for violence against Christians.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
London
Nazim Pasha
Tchatalja
Constantinople
Porte
Kiami] Pasha
Turkey
Adrianople
Scutar
Janina
Red Cross
Stepanovitch
Kratova
Zivkovitch
Sienitza
Kumanova
Carnegie Foundation to pension ex presidents and widows
The Carnegie Foundation trustees announce pensions of 25000 annually for future ex presidents and their unmarried widows, no application required, to support their later years. Taft plans to receive the pension upon retirement next March. The second annual meeting was held with members including Andrew Carnegie Elihu Root Henry S Pritchett Woodward Taylor Frew Franks and Bertram.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York
Carnegie Foundation
Andrew Carnegie
United States
Taft
Carnegie Corporation
Congress
Corporation
Elihu Root
Henry S. Pritchett
Robert 8. Woodward
Charles L. Taylor
William N. Frew
Robert A. Franks
James Bertram
Mr. Carnegie
Tragic shooting follows quarrel in Hammond
In Hammond Indiana on Thursday nineteen year old Frank Cravens shot his stepmother Mrs Lincoln Cravens after a trivial quarrel and then shot himself. Both are reported to be fatally wounded by physicians.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Hammond
Ind
Frank Cravens
Lincoln
Cravena
French Aviator Andre Frey Killed In Flight Crash
Andre Frey the well known aviator was killed at Rheims France when his aeroplane collapsed during a flight around the aerodrome. He fell more than 150 feet to the ground Thursday.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Rheims
France
Andre Frey
Skyscraper Collapse Shocks Portland Business District
The Marquam building on Sixth street in Portland collapsed Thursday with bright floors on the Sixth street façade falling away. No injuries were reported.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Portland
Ore
Marquam Building
Idaho names new senator Kirtland J. Perky
Idaho Governor telegraphed the credentials of Kirtland J. Perky to the secretary of the senate on Tuesday to avoid delay. Perky fills the new Idaho seat as the term begins.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Washington
Idaho
Kirtland J. Perky
Senate
Schrank Found Insane by Psychiatric Commission
A five alienists panel declared John Schrank insane after examining his mental state following the Roosevelt assassination attempt. Judge Backus will review the finding and determine next steps for Schrank.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Schrank
Milwaukee
John Schrank
Theodore Roosevelt
Backus
Will dissolve trust in enameled ironware case
Supreme Court declares license agreements among sanitary enameled ironware manufacturers illegal under Sherman act. Government had charged 60 defendants including 16 corporations with restraining interstate trade and attempting monopoly in bathtub ware.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Washington
Supreme Court of the United States
United States District Court of Maryland
Train Hold Up Near Ottumwa Leaves Passengers Robbed
An Ottawa Illinois Sioux passenger train on the Chicago Milwaukee and St Paul line from Kansas City to Chicago was halted between Ottumwa and Mystic by two bandits. They boarded at Mystic robbed travelers and kept them prisoner until Ottumwa. Loot reported about 360 dollars.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Ottumwa
Chicago, Milwaukee & St. Paul Railway
Southwest Limited
Kansas City
Chicago
Mystic
Kingston
Jamaica
Montego Bay
Lucea
Green
Nationwide postal raids target illegal medical schemes
Raids by postal inspectors hit nearly every state on Wednesday as a nationwide crusade against doctors and druggists promoting dangerous remedies began. In Chicago ten were arrested. total arrests reached 173 across 72 towns and cities.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Chicago
United States
Hoy
Portland
Ore
Seattle
Oakland
Cal
Cincinnati
San Francisco
Pittsburg
Indianapolis
St. Paul
Denver
Spokane
Oklahoma City
Forth Worth
Omaha
St. Louis
Buffalo
Los Angeles
Mobile
Marietta
San Jose
New York
Albany
Washington
Memphis
Birmingham
Steubenville
Cleveland
Pine Bank
Cumberland
Kalamazoo
Mich
Iron River
Holden, Mo
Muskogee
Okla
Wichita, Kan
Council Bluffa
Bellingham
Wash
Crescent
Tacoma
Sacramento
Petaluma
Fresno
Glendale
Four gunmen convicted of Rosenthal murder in New York
In New York the gunmen Gyp the Blood Lefty Louie Whitey Lewis and Dago Frank Cirofici were found guilty of murder in the first degree for the Rosenthal killing. The verdict came after a short jury deliberation. Sentencing date to be fixed by Justice Goff.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
New York
Herman Rosenthal
Gyp the Blood
Lefty Louie
Goff
Jack Rose
Bridgey” Webber
Harry Wallon
William Shapiro
Sam Schepps
Jack Sullivan
Rosenthal
Charles H. Hyde
Three Plunge to Death in Hotel Fire
Fire at the St. George hotel on East 3rd street in Los Angeles killed three and injured twenty as flames trapped guests on upper floors. The dead are actress Mrs Charlotte Harrington jewelry clerk Joseph Martin and Mrs Elia Moran.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Los Angeles
Cal
St. George Hotel
East 3Rd Street
Main
Charlotte Harrington
Joseph Martin
Elia Moran
Rebels Beaten In Fight Near Madera Chihuahua
In a battle Thursday near Madera Chihuahua federals under Gen Jose Blanco defeated two bands of rebels led by Richardo Terrazas and Juan Ramos. Twelve rebels were killed.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
el Paso
Tex
Madera
Chihuahua
Jose Blanco
Richardo Terrazas
Juan Ramos
Red Cross Sends Aid to Balkan Troops
Washington reports the American Red Cross sent 8000 dollars to Balkan relief efforts on Thursday for Turkish Bulgarian and Serbian soldiers, bringing the total U S aid to 48000 dollars.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Red Crosse
Woashington
Red Cross
United States
Murder at Cairo grocery store ends in shooting
S Mallouf, a Syrian grocer in Cairo with his father M Mallouf, was shot and killed Wednesday by three Black robbers attempting a hold up. The incident occurred in the store in Cairo.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Negroca
Cairo
S. Mallouf
M. Mallouf
Two Allene Granted Respite in Virginia Murders
Governor Mann granted Floyd and Claude Allen a respite until December 13 after their death sentences on November 22 for involvement in the Hillaville Virginia courthouse murders.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Allene
Richmond
Mann
Floyd
Claude Allen
Hillaville
Indicted for Boy's Murder in Lackawanna Case
Buffalo, November 21. The supreme court grand jury returned an indictment charging murder in the first degree against J Frank Hickey for the death of seven year old Joseph Josephs of Lackawanna. The case follows the boy's fatal injury and related investigations.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Buffalo
N. Y
Supreme Court
Grand
J. Frank Hickey
Joseph Josephs
Lackawanna
Rockefeller Gives $5000 to Red Cross Relief
Washington November 22 John D Rockefeller contributed $5000 to the American Red Cross for Balkan relief. The donation increases the national total to $40000.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Washington
John OD. Rockefeller
American Red Cross
Balkan
Rockefeller
Oldest U. S. Ship Out of Commission in Navy Yard
Vallejo California November 22 The century old receiving ship Independence the oldest vessel in the navy was placed out of commission at Mare Island navy yard on Wednesday. The cruiser Cleveland takes her place.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
U. S
Vallejo
Cal
Independence
Mare Inland Navy Yard
Cleveland
Lewis Not Guilty in Mail Fraud Case
In St. Louis on November 21 the jury in the HF. G. Lewis mail fraud case reported to Judge Willard that Lewis was acquitted.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
E. G. Lewis
St. Louis
HF. G. Lewis
Willard
United States District Court
Lewis
Robbers Blow Kingston Bank Vault Break In
Robbers dynamited the Kingston Bank and Trust Company vault on Monday, seizing $1,500 in cash and escaping. The blast shattered the vault as the heist occurred in Kingston, Tennessee, on November 20.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Kingston, Tenn
Kingston Bank and Trust Company
Monkey-faced bomber captured after Central station scare
In Los Angeles on November 21 police at Central station were driven outside by a masked man wearing a monkey head, who carried a box with an infernal machine and threatened to detonate it if touched. He was captured by a ruse.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Los Angeles
Cal
Central Station
Man Dies After Living With Broken Neck In Hospital
Neenah Wisconsin November 23 Chester Robbie aged fifty five died in a hospital after living three days with a broken neck from a fall downstairs. His body was completely paralyzed.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Neenah
Wis
Chester Robbe
Pulitzer Estate Valued At 18 Million In New York
Joseph I. Berry the ap praiser filed a report with the deputy state controller showing the estate of the late Joseph Pulitzer valued at 18 525 116 22 dollars. The real and personal property are included in the filing made in New York.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Pulitzer
New York
Joseph I. Berry
Joseph Pulitzer
Head of Ohio Bank President Ends Own Life in Columbus
William Little aged sixty one president of the West Side Dime Savings Bank died by suicide in Columbus on Wednesday. He suffered a nervous breakdown and hanged himself with a rope fashioned from bedclothes. The tragedy occurred during a period of personal distress and financial strain.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Ohio Bank
Columbus
William Little
West Side Dime Savings Bank
Hetty Green Celebrates Seventy-Eighth Birthday
Mrs Hetty Green celebrated her seventy eighth birthday in New York on Thursday. She is described as possibly the world s richest woman and the world s greatest businesswoman.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Hetty Green
New York
Railroads End Holiday Excursion Rates Citing Policy Change
Des Moines reports railroads are withdrawing holiday rates and excursions this year. The two cent fare is cited as the main cause, with lawmakers seen as using excursion pricing as a model for broader fare cuts. Railroads argue other sectors raise prices with costs while they must keep earnings and invest in machinery, leading to no holiday excursions.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Des Moines
Farmer Pays Wife Large Alimony After Divorce
James Bauer a wealthy farmer from near Kingsley Iowa must pay his wife twelve thousand dollars in alimony plus a little more. He recently sold a 280 acre farm for forty thousand dollars to fund the settlement and custody of two of their three children after a conference of attorneys arranged the terms.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Sioux City
James Bauer
Kingsley
Bauer
Local Real Estate Dealer Fined for Contempt of Court
In Creston Judge Evans fined Matthew Ahern twenty dollars and costs after finding him guilty of contempt for attempting to bribe jurors in his damage suit against the city. Ahern had previously been awarded two hundred fifty five dollars for injuries from a sidewalk fall. bribe evidence emerged during the trial.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mexico City
Acanbay
Mexico
Gibraltar
United States
Montana
Tennessee
Washington
Charles D. Hilles
Republican National Committee
White House
Carmi Thompson
Rayner
Creston
Evans
Matthew Ahern
Ahern
Charge Fraud In Voting In Woodbury County
Woodbury county grand jury returned thirty nine indictments including five members of the election board for the Second precinct Fifth ward. They allegedly allowed nearly one hundred illegal votes during the special election on the proposed telephone merger.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Sioux City
Woodbury County
Grand Jury
Fifth Ward
Bloomfield Lodge No. 22 I O O F Celebrates 63rd Anniversary
Bloomfield lodge No. 22 I O O F marked its sixty third anniversary with a banquet for about 150 Odd Fellows and their wives and sweethearts.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Bloomfield
Bloomfield Lodge No
Odd Fellows
Marshal Kills Demented Man in Gowrie
Marshal Woods shot and killed M. 8. Moore, 65, after Moore fired on Oscar Berg Fred Gardner and the marshal. Moore, a non resident, was said to be demented. The incident occurred in Gowrie.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Gowrie
Moore
Marshal Woods
Oscar Berg
Fred Gardner
Convicted in Second Degree Murder Case
Fort Dodge resident B R McClosky was found guilty of second degree murder for stabbing Thomas Brown of Webster City on September 2. Sentencing date not yet set.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Fort Dodge
B. R. McClosky
Thomas Brown
Webster City
May Start Socialist Paper in Mason City
Socialists in Mason City plan a weekly newspaper to be named Cerro Gordo County Leader with John Spence as editor. The first issue is slated for November 30.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Mason City
Cerro Gordo County
John Spence
Candidates Draw Lots For County Clerk Seat
In Algona the tied race for Kossuth County clerk ends with each candidate risking 250 dollars. The winner Clerk Stephenson gains the office while the loser receives 500 dollars.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Algona
Kossuth County
Stephenson
Poison Mistaken Drug Saved Young Man's Life
In Dubuque an 18 year old, Paul Hoffman, ingested a large dose of what he believed was licorice powder but was actually poisonous insect destroyer. Prompt physician action saved him from fatal poisoning.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Dubuque
Paul Hoffman
Tile Association Meets In Mason City January 1913
The Interstate Tile Association and the Iowa Cement Users' Association will hold a joint meeting in Mason City during the first week of January 1913.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Tile Association
Mason City
Interstate Tile Association
Iowa Cement Users’ Association
Governor William Larrabee Dies in Clermont at 71
Des Moines reports former Iowa governor William Larrabee died at his Clermont home on November 16 1912 after a five month illness. He served 1886 to 1890 and championed measures from railroad rate reform to public utility ownership and woman suffrage, earning a legacy as a fearless defender of the plain people. He and Ann Appleman wed in Clermont in 1861 and left a modest estate that aided education and music in state institutions.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Des Moines
Iowa
William Larrabee
Clermont
Francis Marion Drake
United States
Board of Railroad Commissioners
Cuba
Philippines
Larrabee
Times
Pap
Senate
Sioux City
Ann M. Appleman
Ledyard
Connecticut
Burglars Break Safes at Mason City Offices
Safes in Woodford & Wheeler lumber offices and S. J. Clausen grain office Mason City were forced open and contents stolen in a recent burglary. A cafe served two large oysters to I. G. Williams of William Brothers Pleasantville, and he was injured operating a saw powered by a gas engine.
MENTIONED IN THIS ARTICLE
Woodford & Wheeler Company
S. J. Clausen Grain
Mason City
Webster City
I. G. Williams
William Brothers
Pleasantville
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J. W. Doxser
Owa
Pennsylvania
Cornell
Newark
New York City
Yale
Carnegie Corporation of New York Wih
Sofia
U. 8
Bathtub Combine
Bage
United Crusade Against
Marshal
Demented Man
Commonwealth