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Newspaper
Monticello Express
Location
Monticello, Iowa, United States of America
Date
May 10, 1900
Page
8
The advertisement touts Hood's Sarsaparilla as America's greatest medicine praising its cures for disease. It claims impure blood elimination, appetite improvement, and renewed vigor. A testimonial from Frank Nolen of Oakland, Iowa credits six bottles with relief from indigestion headaches and nervousness.
A long haired caller challenges an editor over a spring poem read aloud in the newsroom. The visitor insists the crocus is the rooster of the flowers, while the editor resists, saying the line is unpublishable. The argument ends with the editor declining to publish the exchange.
Washington Star recounts Representative Holly of Minnesota noting Mr Ed’s playful self-mockery. He recalls touring with a Civil War drummer who could stir crowds, and a 12 year old observer who advised him to keep the captain drumming.
An old advertisement touts Allen's Foot-Ease powder for foot comfort. It claims to ease corns bunions swelling and soreness, reduce sweating, and help fit new or tight shoes. Sold by druggists and shoe stores with a 25cc size and free sample mailed to Allen 8 Olmsted Le Roy N.Y.
In a Chicago Journal excerpt Sue Brett-Rather asks about long waits in a piece she is playing. Hamlett asks if there are delays, noting she has waited ten weeks for a chance to view her salary details.
An old advertisement touts Kemp's Balsam as stopping coughing immediately and offers a free sample bottle from the druggist. It promotes large bottles priced at 25 and 50 cents and urges readers to act without delay.
A collection of witty remarks from Baltimore American, Atchison Globe, Chicago Daily News. Includes lines about the telephone’s convenience, a Beamer’s restaurant roast, a town namesake’s fall into poverty, and observations on learning vs talking and marriage motives.
An old advertisement claims Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets cure a cold in one day with a refund if ineffective. It lists a 25 cent price and includes a promotional slogan from Ram's Horn urging smarter shoppers to value reality.
A Perak tugger elephant battled a goods train for an hour on the line, backing into the engine and forcing a stop. The locomotive pushed the beast off the rails, injuring the animal and killing it. Earlier incidents in India and Bengal-Nagpur saw elephants collide with trains, sometimes fatal, prompting memorial tusks and warnings that such collisions threaten both elephants and rolling stock.
Authentic works describe a Nerbudda banyan that once sheltered 7000 men under a canopy now reduced by floods to about 2000 feet in circumference with over 3000 trunks. Other trees span 13 acres near temples and funeral mounds. Leaves are five by four inches, bright green, used as plates, figs are insipid but plentiful, wood is porous and largely worthless, while various parts are used medicinally by natives.
An official report from the Russian Bureau of Statistics notes peasants in scarcity hibernate in place. They lie in bed or on a flat stove, replenish the stove, and subsist on a reduced ration of black bread dipped in water. The hut remains dark and silent all winter.
A Cincinnati Commercial Tribune item presents a visual riddle. The caption asks how many babies appear when counting hidden figures within arms and legs. It suggests seven baby boys exist, though the obvious three are seen first.
A horse purchased from ex Senator Dawes, used on a baggage wagon in Pittsfield Massachusetts, slips on ice twice in one spring day, is unhitched for a nooning meal, and disappears then reappears at the stable after being shod. She trots to the station next day with new corks and endears herself to stable workers.
A rat is crushed during a Minneapolis elevator incident as oil lubricates the pulley mechanism. Operator Lunden struggles with the runaway car while the rat clings to rigging. the car crashes the shaft top, rebounds, and settles on the first floor. A separate note, The Lesson Was a Failure, tells of a father proving watch theft by taking his own watch.
The piece notes that in the Campo Santo near San Juan on the island of Puerto Rico graves are leased for years and can be dug up if not renewed, a costly practice that forces the poor to forgo burial rights. It also mentions miners feeding pet rats in Colorado mines and cites 200 Indian schools with the first opened two decades ago.
Bartlett Sinclair state auditor testified on the Wardner disturbances in 1899, detailing threats to miners, calls for state protection, and the decision to declare martial law. He described arrests of miners, troop protection, and improved prison meals while emphasizing lawful action to restore order.
The growth of U S exports to Japan China Hong Kong Australasia Asiatic Russia Hawaii and the Philippines surges from 1893 levels to 1899 and an estimated 1900 total Asia Oceania exports rise from about 27.4 million to roughly 78.2 million with an expected 160 million for the current year reflecting tariff protection effects.
The piece notes very low college death rates and high attention to physical fitness. It endorses Hos teter's Stomach Bitters as preventive and curative for general weakness, blood, nerve, and stomach disorders, including constipation and indigestion.
A dressmaker seeks to verify a former maid's honesty after repeated failure to pay bills when sent with the employer. The quip cites a Chicago Evening News joke about trust and payment between employer and maid.
Mrs Gee of Westfield Massachusetts writes Genesee Pure Food Co praising Grain-O saying three months of use has boosted her weight from 103 to 120 pounds. She reports increased appetite and strength and urges others to try Grain-O as best she ever took. Rain’s Horn quotation ends note.
An advertisement asserts deafness cannot be cured by local applications and must be treated constitutionally. It explains blockage of the Eustachian tube from inflammation causes hearing loss and offers to pay one hundred dollars for any catarrh deafness not cured by Hall a Catarrh Cure from Cheney & Co. Toledo Ohio, with Hall's Family Pills promoted as best.
A mother prompts her son Georgie through a childhood prayer as he tires, sleepily reaching the line about blessing the whole schooling match. The boy nods off before completing the final blessing, leaving a flutter of sleepy lids and a folded list of relatives in the moment.
Ad claims Grain-O does not stimulate and nourishes while resembling coffee. It appeals to nervous people, youths and children as a perfect grain drink, urging purchase from grocers and suggesting use in place of coffee.
A Persian courtier, now rich, pretends amnesia to test a friend who comes to congratulate him. The friend reveals his identity as the old confidant and offers condolence, claiming to have heard of the courtier’s recent loss of sight. The tale comments on how wealth can erase former ties.
The Detroit Journal notes a provocative question for young women in a restless era asking if devotion means practical help like doing washing for a man rather than dying for love. It frames love as a test of modern female duty and resilience.
A Colorado Special departs Chicago daily at 10:00 AM and arrives in Denver at 1:20 PM the next day, with Colorado Springs and Manitou reached the same evening. No car changes and dining car service offered. Also a fast train at 10:30 PM and a new book Colorado mailed for four cents postage. Tickets from Chicago and North Western offices at 103 Clark Street and Wells Street Station.
A fragmented 19th century advertisement touts Piso's Cure for coughs and general wellbeing. The note claims bowel movement aid and liver kidney relief, with testimonials from Mrs Bunt and Mr Bunt about noisy neighbors and a piano. The reference dates to June 6, 1000, and lists J W O'Brien of Minneapolis as a contact.
An advertisement touts Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound as a cure for female disorders and related troubles. It cites uterine and ovarian derangements, kidney issues, ulcers, tumors, unusual discharges, and back pain, claiming thirty years of success and numerous women’s testimonials.
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