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Monticello Express in Monticello, Iowa

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Articles on This Page

This newspaper page contains 19 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.

Newspaper

Monticello Express

Location

Monticello, Iowa, United States of America

Date

Mar 17, 1910

Page

4

Watch Repair by a Knife and a Bold Bystander

A Washington Post anecdote describes a bystander named swillkwillby who saved a broken watch. After a two dollar watch fell seven feet onto a sidewalk, he picked up an intact crystal, bent hands back with a pocketknife, reassembled the rim, and placed the piece in his pocket before continuing on.

Mr. Grillkitton Bwillkwill Swillkwillby Ile Washington Post

Busting the Boaster A Lightning Calculator Feat Fails

A showman proclaims his rapid math system and offers a booklet promising mastery in a week. He boasts he can multiply vast numbers on stage, but this tall tale collapses as spectators question the impossibility and practical proof is lacking.

Child age riddle sparks sharp exchange in London Answers

A London Answers quip mocks a question about a child born in September 1909 who would be 1 year old in September 1910 the sharp retort calls the calculation absurd noting the supposed age would be 17 101 years.

London

The Villain's Teeth

A New York Press report describes the challenge of fitting false teeth for a melodrama villain. Dentists compare two similar sets costing ten dollars apart, noting the need for precise shaping to produce convincing sibilant sounds and bloodsucking expressions.

New York Press

What Is a Gentleman Real definition from the New York Sun

A quotation frames a real gentleman as someone clean inside and out. He neither looks up to the rich nor down on the year, can lose without squealing and win without bragging, respects women children and old people, is brave enough to live and honest enough to cheat none.

New York Sun

It Seems Queer She Favored Him in Her Fancy

The Chicago Record-Herald notes that she admired him despite him not fitting her expected type. He always noticed when she wore a new bat or a dress just from the dressmaker, revealing his quiet attentiveness.

Chicago Record-Herald

Two Tales of Turmoil and a Clever Real Estate Woman

A serialized fragment mixes a romance with social satire as Edith confronts a suitor, while the Maxwell family escapes a Kansas cyclone that rescues them from a dangerous neighbor. In Highland Bluffs a widow auctioneers a vast suburban sale, profiting greatly before reinventing herself with a store. Whitman recalls assisting George Childs by delivering overcoats to needy streetcar drivers.

Highland Bluffs Improvement Company Bluffs Carson Highland Bluffs Whitman Childs Walt Whitman Camden Walt George Childs

A Foolish Notion and a Sage Saying Quote

A Chicago Record-Herald quote notes that most men who feel the world is against them are insignificant and unseen. A Jane Porter line adds that happiness is not perfected until it is slated. The remarks reflect ironic contrasts on self-importance and fulfillment.

Chicago Record-Herald Jane Porter

I Would Not Trust My Judgment in Marriage

A narrator travels to Florida to propose to Edith and seeks opinions from other women. He learns Edith is disliked by hotel peers, labeled vain selfish and untruthful, and discovers a mutual admiration society among them. He ends by deciding to return north and end the engagement.

Iaa Edith Florida Idith Ufe

Western Widow Suspects Suitor's Motives in Neighboring Farm

Maxwell family moves west to Kansas to raise crops and restore health. Neighbor Stuntz, from Kentucky, pressures Caroline Maxwell after proposing marriage. He disrupts the farm by trespassing, damaging crops, and harassing the Maxwell household as tensions escalate.

Widow Carson Invests in Island Farm After Carpenter’s Death

After carpenter Mr. Carson dies leaving $3,000 life insurance, his widow Mrs. Carson plans to invest the funds in a long‑sought Long Island 200 acre farm described as old and decayed. Neighbors urge hogs or quick profits but she keeps counsel, weighing a bold future.

Highlinds Carson Ile Squire Henderson Tlighlands Long Island

Lipton’s early American voyage and lodging plan

Sir Thomas Lipton recalls leaving home at sixteen for the United States after believing quick prosperity was possible there. He describes arriving in New York with little money and securing board by promising a hotel proprietor forty patrons for a month, then guiding fellow passengers to join.

Sir Thomas Lipton London Strand Magazine America United States New York

Long lived olive trees in Syria and near Beirut

Ancient olive trees in Syria near Tripoli and a large grove near Beirut show remarkable ages and productivity. Syrians adopt European cultivation methods to increase yields while traditional thrashing harmed trees. Olive grinding and picking are done by unpaid workers paid on a percentage basis.

Syria Tripoli Beirut

Miss Beale and Larned Meet in Lucerne Scheme

In Lucerne Switzerland Miss Annetta Beale from Chicago plans a marriage match with Edward Larned’s son George. Beale and her friend pose as Miss Bergen to gauge suitability, with Larned and his companion Pierson observing. The ruse unfolds during an opera intermission at the Kursaal.

Annetta Beale Chicago Lucerne Switzerland Lowenstrasse Miss Seale Thram Beale Edward Larned Tarned Berle Miss Beale Laura Bergen George Larned Miss Bergen Mr. Larned George Pierson Pierson Ikursaal James Larned Mr. Pierson Music Hall

Dangerous Insects In A Trolley Car Misadventure

A trolley car stalls on a country road and both crewmen cannot diagnose the fault. A passenger asks what is wrong and a fellow passenger jokes that microscopic insects called olims cause resistance by blocking wires, a fanciful, humorous confusion about electricity in this Youth's Companion piece.

The Joy That Killed and a Grim Punchline

A senator praises a congressman’s humor while recalling a mutual acquaintance who died. The joke turns grim as he notes the man’s wife died two days after him, and the congressman quips she was tickled to death.

The Man of the Hour and a Dinner Invitation

Little Charles was sent to Miss J s to return a basket and was warmly received. He was invited to come again and stay for dinner. He replied solemnly that he would stay today.

Charles

Methods Under Scrutiny Mentioned by Jones

A Cleveland Leader clipping notes TI met with Jones today and reports Jones stating TI’s methods require honing. The brief interchange implies ongoing evaluation of TI’s approach.

Jones Cleveland

Double Wedding Stems from Quartet Deception

Sdémed and rivals vie for Miss Beale as weeks of mountain trips and gaming fade. Miss Beale reunites with her lovers after a fatherly counterplot, revealing a plan of two couples marrying in a double wedding to celebrate the happy outcome.

Also Mentioned on This Page

Aeiyt Tommy Maxwells Stuntz Maxwell Kentucky Kansas Stunts Alma Swartz American Press Association Edmond B. Lincoln Gerald) Maxwell Maansas Ife Caroline Maxwell Miss Maxwell Mr. Maxwell Caroline Tie Tommy Maxwell M. Quad Associated Literary Press Newton Caldwell Sdémed Pilatus Rigt Tlucerne Ioursaal Cable Larned Mr. Beale Tom Tawra Bergen
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