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Newspaper
Monticello Express
Location
Monticello, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jul 13, 1905
Page
8
Daisy and Billy Teller celebrate being fired from the firm amid a playful row over pay cuts and harsh bosses. They dine at a cheap table d hote while Cartaret unexpectedly joins, sparking a mock society proposal and plans to reinstate them.
Billy urges Cartaret to assign Mr Teller to Miss Denning's old employer. The plan to celebrate job loss and regain leads to an invite for supper after a theater visit. Cartaret hints the favor is his, offering a steady married man for the job and Billy vows to arrange it. Daisy and Billy discuss the whispered hint and the pending supper.
The article traces the slang term lobster from seventeenth century origins to its use in Buckstone's The Green Bushes and Eden Phillpotts The Farm of the Dagger. It cites Tom Brown’s 17th century phrase lobsters and tatterdemalions as the earliest derisive pairing, with references to Irish rebellion era redcoat imagery and Shakespearean links.
A country life note explains ruffed grouse drumming is not produced by wing flaps. The cock drums while perched, with no need to flap, and flapping simply fills lungs and throat.
In a Stepney school an East London teacher quizzed pupils on Scriptural topics. A girl answered Samson killed a thousand Philistines with the ax of the apostles. Another pupil misinterpreted Moses ark details, saying the slime and pitch were to make the baby stick inside.
Parrots are keen observers and mimics often repeating phrases from prayers and creeds in clergy homes. While some birds sing hymns like There Is a Happy Land without harm, others can offend by interjecting lines such as Let us pray at improper times.
A preacher cites the Bible on sowing and reaping while a skeptic jokes that it does not prove infallibility. The exchange humorously contrasts divine justice with everyday garden politics as quoted by the Philadelphia Press.
A New York pawnbroker argues that lending, even in small items, is acts of generosity. He insists loans go only to trustworthy customers and notes repeated patrons, including a woman who borrows opera glasses for the theater, while denying misconduct behind the practice.
Bronze ornaments require no preparations or heavy cleaning. Gentle dusting suffices and may remove a purple tinge with a light rubbing of sweet oil on the discolored area.
A mixed page item reports an estray mare taken up by Arthur B. Steyne in Scotch Grove township Jones county Iowa on June 16 1905. It notes the mare is chestnut sorrel with two white hind feet a white facial strip branded 21 and weight about 900 pounds. Also mentions W J Mills auditor Anamosa Iowa June 28 1905. The Iowa Manufacturers Association starts an insurance company with HQ in Waterloo. A Poggen klaus place for rent near Monticello offers a good house barn six acres inside town with pasture for a cow. Includes ads for Kodol Dyspepsia Cure DeWitt's Witch Hazel Salve and Diamond Creamery pricing. A Los Angeles Times snippet reports a New York man whose wife refuses to spend his money because it is tainted. Also endorses DeWitt's Little Early Risers as a safe remedy for various ailments.
G A R special train to Denver departs August 31 from Arboul t Austin Mason City Decorah West Union Dubuque Cedar Rapids and September 1 from Perry Spencer. Free reclining chair cars August 8 from Emmetsburg and Calmer. Low rates to Colorado. inquire at ticket offices for rates and itineraries.
Oaklan don Indiana resident FF. G. Huntley touts Dr King s New Discovery for Consumption Coughs and Colds claiming his wife regained health after doctors gave up The ad also promotes Hallister s Rocky Mountain Tea and lists trial bottles and prices The Chicago News notes Engineer Wallace s abrupt resignation timing and action.
An old Kansas City Star note touts One Minute Cough Cure with three claims: it is harmless, tastes good to children, and cures coughs, croup, and whooping cough when other remedies fail. It also warns against riding fast trains, comparing them to slow trains in safety terms.
A St Joseph Gazette ad proclaims Kodox Dyspepsia Cure will add to the physical by aiding digestion and nutrient appropriation. It claims to digest food fully, making all health benefits usable, while noting the product is pleasant to taste. The note ends with a playful jab at societal power and a remark about Romanoff.
An advertised beauty tea claims to beautify the complexion at low cost. The old catalog style promotes a creamlike look with rosy cheeks and laughing eyes for 35 cents.
An advertisement touts Electric Bitters as a cure for malaria and related illnesses with testimonials from E. S. Munday of Henrietta Texas. It contrasts favorably with quinine and notes a 50 cent price at O H Soetje's drug store. The Toledo Blade mocks mosquito fashion statements while promoting Hollister's Rocky Mountain Tea priced at 35 cents.
In Jones County Iowa Miles Cook sues Hamilton Freeman Martha Ringer Casander Brown Carline Miller Jane Tedford Eliza Lamb Eliza Hitchcock Mary Lovink and others unknown heirs to establish his title to the south half of the southwest quarter and north half of the northwest quarter of section 31 township 83 north range 1 west. The petition traces tax deeds and executor deeds from 1861 to 1864 and the plaintiff's possession since 1893, seeks to quiet title and bar all claims, with notice to unknown heirs and claimants. The case sets September 25 1905 as the next term and warns defaults will lead to judgment.
Ad copy touts Dr King s New Life Pills as a modern blood and system cleanser. Claims cure for stomach and liver troubles with a 25c guarantee at Soetje s drug store in Atlanta Journal note mentions Kentucky mocking presidential mint official hires.
Harriet Howard of 209 West 84th Street New York writes of long skin trouble spoiled her beauty until Bucklin's Arnica Salve cured it. A quick healer for cuts burns and sores 50 cents at O H Soetje's drug store.
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