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Newspaper
Monticello Express
Location
Monticello, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jan 26, 1905
Page
7
Charlemagne Tower recalls a Berlin diplomat's tale about a young American girl and a mad dog bite. He notes Americans adore Paris but European credos differ. The anecdote contrasts rabies treatment availability, implying Paris as the hopeful destination amid danger and travel lore.
John Burroughs recalls a visit to I Orr in a town where six of his children play on the lawn. The naturalist asks about a collection and the Orrs respond with their orchids, presenting them as fine, healthy specimens forming a home collection.
A buyer challenges the agent over a boast of “a stone's throw from the station” as a side show promoter declares readiness to hire the man who hurled that stone. The exchange highlights sales hype and local speculation.
A fragment from Tit-Bits plays with a mock dialogue about a man named Dobson a “great composer” who “manufactures soothing syrup” in a humorous exchange between Penelope and Ethel-Who.
A collection of quirky quotes and mock dialogue from periodical humor pages. Snippets reference oil painting, Standard Company, Uncle Hiram, and cork vests, followed by satirical remarks on literacy rates and romantic missives in newspaper voice.
Estherville Iowa resident George J Barber narrates a fifteen year kidney illness progression to Bright's Disease. After using Dodd's Kidney Pills, he reports a complete cure after two boxes and endorses the product for kidney ailments. He credits doctors in Chicago and local physicians.
An advertisement promotes Cuticura Soap and Cuticura Ointment for night soaking and drying, claiming relief from sore hands and feet. It advises wearing old kid gloves and notes widespread effectiveness for dry fissured nails and itching, touting a quick, economical cure.
Tickets on sale via Queen and Crescent and Southern Railway to Florida New Orleans and other southern points at greatly reduced rates. Travel via Atlanta to Florida and Cuba with return routes through Asheville. Addresses given for rate information include W A Beckler Chicago D P Brown Detroit and others. Also notes about a birth anniversary and a medical ad reference Pisos Cure.
At the Neva Chapel during Epiphany rites Emperor Nicholas and the Romanoff family narrowly escaped when a grape shot from a guard battery detonated near the palace. Official reports blame an accidental charge misfire, but investigators probe for a possible plot amid secrecy and public skepticism.
Brodie L. Duke, half brother of the American Tobacco president, was brought into Brooklyn Supreme Court and discharged from custody after habeas corpus proceedings. Justice Gaynor ruled Duke not demented and ordered his liberty restored following a hearing.
Three boys from Altoona died or were badly hurt while coasting near Tyrone. William Elder aged 12 and George Thomas aged 12 were killed when struck by a moving locomotive. George Leiper, 10, survived initially but remained critically injured.
Chicago January 20 The Illinois State Association for the Prevention of Tuberculosis has been formed and an active practical campaign is to be carried out throughout the state. The legislature will likely be asked for 3 250 000 for a state sanitarium.
Berlin reports the Vorwaerts estimate 240000 workers are on strike in the coal mining district. Dispatches from the strike area show no change in the situation as of today.
In Monroe county at the Draper lease Lewisville a boiler explosion instantly killed pumper Hopkins and farmer Sherman Barker. The men were in the boiler house when low water prompted Hopkins to release water and the blast hurled them 75 feet.
Ex-Congressman B F Rice who served several terms as Arkansas representative died in Tulsa on Thursday. He had been a longtime political figure and his death marks the end of a notable public career in the state.
Late reports confirm that four Americans and one Mexican were ambushed and killed by Yaqui Indians on January 19 four miles east of Cobachi, Sonora. Victims include Dr. R. C. Coy of Chicago and John K. Mackenzie of Chicago. others named. The attack occurred as the party returned from Camp Toledo and looting followed with two vehicles shot and burned. Mexican troops were dispatched from Hermosillo to pursue the Yaquis under Gen. Torres.
Charles Tuxhorn of a farm 14 miles southwest of McPherson Kansas murdered his sons aged six and ten smothering them then burned his house and barn before shooting himself. He had been jailed on a mistreatment charge and was to appear in court today. The 40 year old man removed bodies to a neighbor's orchard and covered them with blankets before the fatal fire.
Speaker Cannon announced seven managers to present the Swayne impeachment to the Senate. Palmer of Pennsylvania Powers of Massachusetts Olmsted of Pennsylvania Perkins of New York Clayton of Alabama De Armond of Missouri and Smith of Kentucky. Most are judiciary committee members.
Iron River Wisconsin January 23 Four persons perish in a rural house fire at the George Barnes residence Jennie May Barnes seven Virginia Barnes four and Elsie Miestner a Washburn teacher are listed among the dead. A separate dispatch reports Circassian revolt reports from the Caucasus with Russian guards killed and frontier crossings. Paris notes indicate Louisa Michel funeral anarchist guard deployments and M Rouvier likely forming a cabinet and premiership acceptance.
Denver January 23 Gov Adams responds to Peabody charge and accuses Republicans of plotting ballot stuffing after the election to trigger fraud cries.
Three distinct earthquakes struck Santiago Cuba within 24 hours starting January 23 causing considerable excitement. No serious damage reported but residents fear further shocks may follow in the region.
A humorous exchange unfolds as Jostle teases Mixer about his two wives sisters and their satire. Ally Sloper protests being ignored on a crowded street car claiming visibility and wit, while a lighthearted quarrel ends with a playful line about forgiveness.
Mrs Peck recalls a moment with Henry about the one word that would make him happy for life. Henry sighs that she chose the wrong word, a reminiscence aired in the Chicago News.
A Chicago Chronicle verse muses that efforts to resolve conflict may yield no harm and still justify trying, noting the heavy sighs that accompany breaking resolutions and the possibility of compensation when the mind recalls the effort.
A child asks why he cannot stay up late as his mother suggests Daddy goes to bed late. The dialogue explores family routines and parental limits in a light humorous tone from a Chicago Tribune cartoon caption.
A clipped exchange mocks social rivals as Ally Sloper notes Mrs Caistor seen in a sweet stole and cape. The speakers debate womanly gossip and the idea of theft amid humorous retorts.
An exchange questions coal usage as an unidentified victim accuses the coal trust of greed in winter hardship. The visitor asks about burning 15 tons of anthracite, while the victim replies the large quantity was to reduce the visible supply.
A brief Town Topics item notes Dolly Semi quaver about to make her debut. A gentle message offers flowers when she sings, adding a playful remark that only hat flowers matter.
A brief note from the St Louis Republic describes meat so small it requires little chewing, claiming the steak is tender and easy to swallow for diners at a boarding house.
In a brisk exchange the Artist labels a work a pot boiler while the Friend counters with sharp disbelief saying the dinner scene feels cold and uninviting. The humor centers on clashing creative ambitions.
Washington Star notes persistent snow covering the ground for weeks followed by gradual thaw as crews arrive to clear the streets in harsh damp conditions. The snippet emphasizes the dirty, moist cold and ongoing effort to restore passage.
In a Tit-Bits amusement note a hotel porter scolds Buggins for fuss over a dusty mirror. The porter complains guests should be thankful and hints at tipping issues as the exchange grows tense.
Mrs Sleeth recalls a clever line her husband once used as a midnight excuse. The Chicago Journal notes the exchange as a wry example of inventive alibis.
A fragment contrasts a father and son discussing a Pharisee figure. The Pharisee is described as a shaven, lip-pressed gentleman opposed to anything of doubtful propriety and unable to be concealed.
In Yonkers Statesman style quip a dialogue questions the origin of a hill named 203-Meter, joking it marks the location of Port Arthur gas works while sparking local curiosity.
A seedy man asks a passerby for coins. When asked his occupation he lifts a tattered sleeve and grins, saying he has been collecting rents for some time past in a grim but humorous exchange from Tit-Bits.
A Yonkers Statesman excerpt shows a couple in a playful exchange about a millinery bill. The woman teases her partner by noting he will whistle when he sees the bill, highlighting domestic humor over shopping. The dialogue emphasizes lighthearted affection and household finance.
Ebenezer Strick and Si Hampley joke about a wife’s rheumatism and desire for a new hat, noting the old headgear has lasted seven and a half years as they speak to a judge.
A dramatic exchange shows a suitor pleading for acceptance while an elder warns of consequences. The dialogue centers on love, loyalty, and potential heartbreak within a social romance narrative from the New York Weekly.
A brief squib notes that using ditto marks would save time in annual resolutions, reflecting opinion from the Washington Star and noting handwriting efficiency. It critiques repetitive phrasing and advocates concise drafting in official documents.
A short note in the Chicago News shows Edith urging Percy to be more engaging in conversation. The playful remark calls him out as overly light headed while urging sharper wit.
In a brisk exchange from Ally Sloper, Skinner notes Bluffin has begun his own business. Winkin asks for proof, and Skinner adds Bluffin now comes to town on the early train and spends only ten minutes for lunch each day.
In a skit style line, a teller asks for ID while a woman and her friend negotiate recognition. Tracy offers to introduce the friend, sparking light humor about identity in a bank setting.
An expert in dietetics in the Washington Star panel forecasts that chemists will continue providing toracic acid in foods rather than changing food composition. The remark reflects debates over food science and chemistry's role in daily diets.
A humorous vignette from Ally Sloper noting Sarah Ann Stebbins and her dog nicknamed a Sarah Bernhardt dog. The piece wryly describes the canine being so refined it carries a pocket flask for those snowbound, amid playful commentary on eccentric pets.
The widow of the commuter killed in the railroad wreck receives $60,000 in damages. The remark about moving to the suburbs is noted in the dialogue from Puck.
Mr. Comrox weighs whether hosting relatives for the winter will be a joyful gathering or a source of boredom as Mother and the girls expect a full house. The exchange hints at family dynamics and social pressure in domestic life.
A colloquial exchange from the Yonkers Statesman recounts a dispute in which Itinerant Ike boasts of striking a janitor in a last house, while weary Williams questions the clash and the reply emphasizes the janitor as the target.
A Brooklyn Life excerpt shows two tramps in a hospital scene. One fears a fatal outcome while the other wonders about a cure for the drink habit.
A hospital scene shows many women awaiting or recovering from operations for ovarian and womb disorders. The article urges early self care, warning signs, and promotes Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound as a safe remedy, citing letters from women helped by the treatment.
A deranged dialogue mocks dentists and their patients in comic exchanges. Rivalry turns into boastful claims about patients posing for photographs during work. The piece skewers language quirks and noisy dialogues from a Chicago Daily News snippet.
A fragment notes a notable deal at John A Salzereed Co of La Crowe Wisconsin, mentioning a hundred00 pinate and maces in relation to a sat remarkable offer.
A transcription notes a warm advocate for cremation arguing that premotion to a living subject is possible and certain, while a statement from the Youlkers Stateman is cited as the source.
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