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Newspaper
Monticello Express
Location
Monticello, Iowa, United States of America
Date
Jan 22, 1903
Page
8
A promotional advert endorses Boschee's German Syrup as a universal cure for severe lung troubles in all civilized countries. It claims the medicine heals, reduces inflammation, aids expectoration, and improves sleep and recovery. Available at druggists for 25 and 75 cents. The Milwaukee Wisconsin quips a coal dealer pun about cold weather.
The advertisement asserts Kodol relieves stomach strain by providing natural digestive juices and resting inflamed muscles to transform food into blood. The St. Louis Globe-Democrat notes a trust forming to control parrot growth and sales, speculating it may merge with the cracker trust later.
The ad touts Electric Bitters as the key to long life by keeping the body's main organs in healthy action and destroying disease germs. It claims stomach liver and kidney regulation purifying blood and improving appetite while curing kidney troubles female complaints nervous disorders constipation dyspepsia malaria and more with vigor and guaranteed by O H Soetje.
A local notice advertises Buy Cream flour with a pledge that once used it remains in use. Every sack sold at the Model store comes guaranteed.
A portrait of private detectives as a curious career. It notes the contrast with police detectives, the need for humility, and the practical realities of finding and hiring a private investigator when crime or suspicion arises.
A historical account discusses nitroglycerin as a remedy for heart trouble and neuralgia, noting its explosive nature and tiny doses. It also describes collodion as gun cotton dissolved in alcohol, and mentions picric acid, prepared from carbolic acid, used in small doses for fever and headache, while warning these substances are dangerous when misused.
A satirical note on fake Italian titles and the cost of maintaining status in Palermo. It contrasts genuine wealth with living on little, describing how heiresses endure frugal meals and faded rooms to fund carriage, driver, and dress for a ceremonial visit to La Favorita and the Giardino Inglese.
Two men argued and fought in the street. hats flew. One bald man grabbed the other by hair and dragged him. A bystander cried to stop him as another quipped the assailant was practicing the Golden Rule by wishing to do unto the other as he wished the other to do unto him.
Fruits are praised as remedies for invalids with apples aiding digestion and reducing acidity when juiced without sugar. The piece cites a reputedly old Michigan pear tree near Lake Erie planted by early French settlers, about thirteen feet around and sixty five feet tall, said to bear abundantly with no special care given to its longevity.
A widow in mourning explains at a matinee she spent the morning at the cemetery tending plants and ivy. She has an iron vase to fix and wants it green all winter, saying it's hard to make a cemetery look homelike.
President Ingalls handwriting an unreadable note leads a farmer near Springfield, Ohio to use it as a road pass. Big Four agent misreads it, suggesting passes issued by Ingalls. The farmer admits using the illegible scrawl as a protest pass until conductors realize the truth.
The Grand Duke and Duchess of Hesse wedding prompted guests to contribute $9 000 in tips for numerous servants and attendants, in addition to $6 500 in gifts distributed among staff.
A Spanish-American War veteran unable to walk visited Admiral Dewey at his Washington home. The admiral, witnessing the veteran hesitate at the steps, lifted him from the carriage and carried him inside to a chair, demonstrating impressive physical strength.
The New York rapid transit contractor says electrical development allows generation in three years. The claim prompts questions about replacing old machinery, who funds new plants, and how long tech will last before equipment must be removed, with concerns over continual scrapping and losses.
On the eve of Minister Wu’s departure a young acquaintance asks why China men take multiple wives. Wu answers with a grave bow that many wives exist so each may embody the beauties and accomplishments of one such young lady.
After three years of effort Antoine, a famed Antwerp lapidary, achieved the remarkable feat of cutting a ring from a single diamond. The ring measures about three quarters of an inch in diameter. Meanwhile the town endured nearly a week of darkness due to boiler flue leaks, with repairs sent to Dubuque.
Advertises Bucklen arnica salve as a universal healer for burns scalds cuts bruises ulcers fever sores eruptions salt rheum boils felons corns and warts. Claims best pile cure and selling at O H Soetje’s drug store for 25 cents.
A mixed list of real estate transfers and ownership changes includes SW Halsey to Mary C Sturtevant in Wyoming, various deeds in sec 17 18 and 10, a Kiburz transfer in Cronkhites add Olin, and several other quitclaim and parcel updates across Oxford Junction Onslow and nearby townships. Also referenced is an advertisement for DeWitt's Little Early Risers with a 1903 newspaper quote.
Paris leads in urban tree culture with a systematic nursery network. Trees are grown, pruned, staked, and transplanted to ensure straight growth, and roots are hardened to survive transport. Planting a single tree can cost about $50, with nurseries supplying replacements after storms.
Mrs. Timmins confronts John Timmins on narrow thinking and refusal to admit others may be right. The quarrel centers on differences in opinion and domestic disagreement about conduct and judgment within the family.
An English physician notes in the Lancet that a mixture of carminatives like spirit of peppermint and spirit of chloroform in hot water often induces sound natural sleep in insomnia where stronger drugs would be avoided.
The Buffalo Express notes that Marconi could circle the earth with a wireless girdle but requires finance from J Pierpont Morgan. The remark frames Morgan as the key obstacle or support in advancing global communication ventures.
Editor O H Downey of Churubusco Ind proclaims Dr King s New Discovery for consumption as the most infallible remedy for coughs colds and grip promising instant relief and cure with guarantees on bottles and free trial bottles offered The Syracuse Post Standard notes Emma Calve s marriage to a French newspaper man and remarks on the song stress possibly leading to something after all.
H A Tisdale of Summerton South Carolina says he suffered piles for 20 years and tried many doctors and medicines before DeWitts Witch Hazel Salve cured him. The ad extols the salve as a cure for piles sores cuts and skin diseases. The Baltimore American praises wireless telegraph but notes it needs poleless streets.
Mrs N A Webster of Winnie Virginia reports Dr King’s New Life Pills cured her two year long sick headaches. Cure headaches constipation biliousness 25c at C H Soetje’s drug store.
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