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This newspaper page contains 21 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Miniota Herald
Location
Miniota, Manitoba, Canada
Date
May 16, 1912
Page
3
Samy, an elder and pious man, marries Tina hoping for a good wife. A Glasgow acquaintance questions Tina’s looks, prompting Samy to gently defend his bride as the Lord’s handiwork rather than a masterpiece.
Mrs Alfred Savard of St Simeon Quebec says years of kidney trouble vanished after trial of Dodd's Kidney Pills. She claims six boxes cured her completely and cites widespread Canadian cures touted by daily papers.
A city editor sends a novice reporter to cover forthcoming Oriental dances by society women. The reporter struggles with questions and blushes at the assignment. Meanwhile analysts estimate world output at 446 million dollars for the last year, up 14 million from 1910 and over 200 million higher than ten years ago.
A New York Globe quip notes the riot began when Hamlet held the skull and spoke Alas, poor Yorick you are not the only deadhead in the house. The item mocks the scene and advertises Holloway's Corn Cure as a remedy for corns.
A sketch portrays the chairman anxious in the first chair as loyal toasts are drunk and the king and queen appear intoxicated. The satire includes a line about smoking after the toasts and notes a separate detail on using pulverized mica to imitate granite.
Good salaries earned by telegraphers and station agents promoted. Grand Trunk and Canadian Northern wires and station books used in school. Day and night mail courses. Free book explains. Railways offer reduced rates to attend here. Dominion School Telegraphy Toronto.
A father praises his son for learning to spell yet notices a small flaw in spelling coffee with KK. The exchange reveals the father's practical focus on cash and character. The son’s over-nice traits are acknowledged while the father quietly notes observant, businesslike behavior.
An advertisement urges a one day cure for a cold using laxatives Brumo Quinine tablets with a money back guarantee and Druggist signed boxes. A Missouri man is jailed for assaulting his wife with a pound of butter prompting commentary on millionaire activity.
An old advertisement touts Dr Thomas' Eclectic Oil as a speedy and permanent relief for ailments. It claims remarkable healing from a six ingredient composition and invites trials to convince skeptics.
An old doctor is approached by a young man with a mixed group and plans to impress a potential rich patient by parading them in his reception room. The anecdote, from Judge's Library, highlights ambition and perception in medical practice.
An odd exchange shows a clever salesman touting hats and liniment to various customers, claiming effects on appearance. The hats are identical, yet sold to many shoppers described as stew lady thin lady elderly lady short lady pale lady, illustrating a light satirical scene.
A fragmentary joke exchanges a burglar question and a retort about dust and silence. Gladys dismisses harm by noting the burglar promised not to reveal how dusty he got unless arrested. The source text is highly garbled and unclear.
A dining room quip has a guest claiming a hair in soup while the waiter jokes that the crack in the plate is mobile and alive. The exchange ends with the guest noting the crack wiggles, highlighting a humorous miscommunication.
The Annuities System has not been abolished. The branch transfer to the Post Office Department under the Postmaster General broadens publicity and access. Early payments yield greater benefits through 4 percent compound interest, reducing risk of late investments. Full information is available at the Post Office or by writing Ottawa.
Mothers fear for their children's safety as illnesses like coughs and colds spread. Parents seek remedies and precautions to protect kids from common contagious diseases this season.
An 1890s style promotion touts Dr Chase's Syrup of Linseed and Turpentine as a safe, prompt remedy for coughs and lung ailments. It targets mothers and children, stresses ease of use, and cites Canada distribution by Edmanson Bates & Co Limited in Toronto with prices 2c and 60c per bottle.
A Louisville Courier Journal excerpt mocks etiquette advice and misleading ads. A reader recalls paying a half crown for printed instructions and receiving a one word slip. It notes Dr J D Kellogg's Dysentery Cordial promises quick relief and warns against dishonest sellers.
Mrs Brannigan asks if Dinny has a steady job. Mrs Mulcahey confirms. Dinny has been sent to the penitentiary for twenty years.
A woman tells her suitor she plans to marry the man who sits across in the kirk on Sundays. When asked his name she blurts Tadimaa ken, prompting disbelief that she would wed someone she does not know. The exchange ends with anticipation rather than certainty.
A young wife asks a grocer for three of ten hams hanging in the shop claiming they are from the same pig as a prior batch. The exchange ends with her resolve not to worry, noting that worry drains happiness.
An advertisement extols Dr Pierce’s Golden Medical Discovery as an alcohol free tonic to restore blood, nerves, and liver function by mimicking Nature. It claims to relieve constipation fatigue and coughing by enriching blood and supporting digestion and vitality, with a testimonial of recovery after illness.
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