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This newspaper page contains 14 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Marshall Republican
Location
Marshall, Illinois, United States of America
Date
May 06, 1910
Page
2
A collection of humorous quips and brief curiosities from a newspaper page. The items range from jokes about meat shortages and hens laying eggs to comments on fashion hats for men and the word hangar versus shed. Snippets cover experiments in farming, aviation terms, and a Niagara whirlpool attempt, rounded by light social and cultural observations.
Theodore Roosevelt addressed the Sorbonne in Paris on citizenship in a republic. He praised American and French values, urged personal virtue and self restraint, and warned that true liberty rests on character and the treatment of minorities, with a call for courage, education, and duty.
A fragmentary line recounts a diva denouncing a paid critic likened to a siren. The oddly phrased text references a whistle and a steamboat as odd images in the clash between performance and criticism.
Washington insiders crowd the hearing as Richard Ballinger testifies on charges by L. R. Glavis and Gifford Pinchot. He asserts he will not follow others who “throw calumny on government officials” and says he did not back down from threats to “kill some snakes.” Ballinger outlines his reform record as Seattle mayor and his path to the land office and interior secretary posts.
Mrs. Aileen Christopher, wife of former city brick tester, conceived the paying brick trust to fix prices for public works in Chicago. Credit goes to William F. Brennan and her husband as collaborators. Over five years the arrangement sold 18 million bricks at a minimum price of 20.50 per thousand, inflating costs by at least 2.60 above free competition.
London report states King Edward presented Lord Kitchener with the baton of field marshal at Buckingham Palace. Secretary of State for War Richard Burdon Haldane announced plans for Kitchener to take air duties as field marshal and commander in chief of the Mediterranean with headquarters in Malta.
Chicago Representative Fees introduced a bill in the House creating April 27 as a legal holiday celebrating Gen. Grant. The measure moved to the judiciary committee for consideration.
Judge Wells fines William Rung one dollar after he smeared cheese on Edward Snider’s face during a luncheon dispute. The court condemns the act as cruel and unusual punishment and scolds the defendant for a crime of scent and humor.
The piece argues that modern government and trade require the moral input of Christianity embodied by foreign missionaries. It asserts civilization depends on liberty, education, and equal justice, with Christianity uniquely meeting these needs. It notes a remarkable shift in sentiment toward foreign missions in a single generation.
An outfitter's shop displayed a warning note about removed articles in the window. A priggish customer entered to view a vivid tie, commented on its loudness, and left after the salesman produced the item. The visitor deemed it offensive and departed without purchasing.
Evidently Net recalls meeting two years earlier at Bluepoint Long Island over a dinner. He recounts a romantic swim where he saved her from a watery grave and their friendship began. The tale ends with a quip about starting their acquaintance in water and keeping it watery.
An English traveler in Peking recalls Sing Loo the great cat doctor who once saved his life. The servant tells of a prior illness treated poorly by another physician, then Sing Loo returns and cures him, prompting praise for his life saving care.
Emerson jokes about sin gle blessedness and fear of a doctor’s word twins during a humorous dialogue with Waters in The Circle. The exchange plays on marriage and potential offspring as a light theatrical moment.
A customer testimonial praises Postum as nourishing for mothers and aiding milk supply. The speaker endorses prolonged boiling for best flavor, notes improved health in a delicate child, and urges proper preparation to ensure a tasty beverage. Read The Road to Wellville.
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