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Newspaper
Marble Hill Press
Location
Marble Hill, Missouri, United States of America
Date
Jun 21, 1894
Page
7
A mosaic of witty exchanges and light humor features quips about bigamy penalties, antique brass, charming gifts, piano jabs, love and matrimony, Venus with a telescope, and a string of domestic gibes. The entries mix dialogue, teasing lines, and amused observations from family and neighbors.
The ad touts irrigated Idaho lands along the Union Pacific line as capable of producing fruit shown at the World's Fair Idaho exhibit. It urges travelers to stop in Idaho to save on fare and freight enough for a farm’s first payment. Advertising matter sent on application. Address E L Lomax Omaha Neb.
An urchin style ad rides a moral quip about eloquence, then hawks Hansons Magic Corn Salve with a money back warranty. It promises cure or refund and urges asking a druggist, priced at 16 vents. A closing joke about offensive alliances with a sister’s brother appears as a snappy aside.
Knowledge brings comfort and improvement and tends to personal enjoyment when rightly applied. Many people who live better and enjoy life more with less expense attest the value of this pure liquid laxative. Syrup of i ts excellence lies in its palatable form delivering cleansing effects, soothing the head and dispelling indolence. It has gained the confidence of the medical profession and millions of users.
A philanthropic visitor learns a convict's tale of craving tobacco aboard a ship bound for San Francisco. The supposed cure by enforced abstinence collides with the ship's cargo of Virginia tobacco, ending in arrest and a twist reveal that the convict is a novelist jailed for murder rather than a tobacco crime.
An American statistician's estimate shows seventy U S citizens share £540 million in wealth, averaging about £7.59 million each, with one estate at £30 million and several individuals at £20 million, £14 million, and lower seven-figure sums, far surpassing British fortunes of the era.
A collage of quips and conversations on love ink debt and mischief. Lines touch on kiss anxieties stag parties sister writers and mistaken identities. The excerpt ends with a moral jab about the noisy minority versus the silent majority.
A compiled fragment of maxims and quips on virtue, self-control, and personal conduct. Warnings against hatred, worry, and condemning others. Includes brief jokes and a testimonial for Hull's Catarrh Cure.
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