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This newspaper page contains 17 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Long Branch Daily Record
Location
Long Branch, New Jersey, United States of America
Date
Jul 07, 1913
Page
8
The Kicker lampoons local officials and rivals with bold exaggerations and threats, recounting lawsuits totaling four million dollars that never went to trial. It boasts a growing circulation, recounts feuds with the Lone Jack Recorder and Sand Hill Blazer, and notes a fatalistic climax as a private graveyard grows from editorials and vendettas.
Jane recalls her father finding four fine cigars on the parlor table this morning. Henry had taken them from his vest pocket to avoid breaking them last night and forgotten about them afterward. A light laugh follows as the moment reveals Henrys forgetfulness and the play of tact in the family room.
A Chicago Record Herald item quotes a woman admitting past squabbles with her husband before his baldness. She jokes that since he dries his hair with a towel and uses a brush, he avoids complaints from finding long hairs, implying baldness steadies temper.
A Fargo Courier News quip features a clever fish warning a hungry youngster about danger. The young fish admits a craving for glory, hoping to be described as the big fish that got away by that man’s friends.
A hotel clerk asks for a name, the guest protests, insisting the signature on the registration proves it. The clerk coolly replies that the signature arouses curiosity, turning a simple name check into a comic exchange and a puzzle of identity.
A playful back and forth about engagements and excuses as a comic exchange contrasts social obligations with dental visits. The dialogue touches on avoiding social bore by citing a dentist appointment as a plausible excuse.
A fragment from the Ohio State Journal describes a tense moment where Rose threatens to kiss in an attempt, while Marie questions it and Rose defends a lack of life insurance for a man whose mother is pitied.
Fragmentary note mentions Mrs Newlywed and hens with very small eggs in the morning. Dialogue references Palmer Indy and Tudor with playful, domestic tone. No clear event or location emerges from the readable text.
A dramatic tale of Cono a Musquakie youth who swaps execution for forgiveness after a deadly quarrel with an Iowa. Black Hawk recalls the moving scene as his people insist on sparing Cono and sending him home, stressing a powerful lesson on mercy despite tribal demands for vengeance.
Mary and Mrs. Morris Parke discuss ordering as Mary struggles to decide. Mr. Morris Parke urged a suggestion while Mary volunteers to try. The scene hints at a light domestic clash over menu choices in a social setting.
In the Winter Palace on the Neva the czar Nicholas I died in a small upper northeast room off a narrow passage. The room, about eighteen by twelve feet with two tiny windows, holds an iron bed, a few chairs and cheap pictures, and a worn pair of slippers.
Lord Whitworth, a diplomat of varied honor, was a gracious wit and worldly man. He once faced Napoleon at the Tuileries, ready with a cane as tension rose over Egypt and Malta. At court he quipped about M Adair’s status, earning praise for a sharp pun.
The London Telegraph contrasts true discovery with mere conjecture. It cites Curie and radium and Laveran with the malaria parasite as examples where the existence and relation were shown for public examination, distinguishing verified findings from unproven guesses.
A humorous sketch extols wooden klompen for Frieslander tasks from boat hailing to water duties. The piece quips about their cheap price, practical uses, and flexible function despite being clumsy and Cinderella-like to some. It blends playful commentary with stray fragments from other columns.
A detailed historical account describes General Washingtons plan to lay a massive iron chain across the Hudson from Fort Montgomery to Anthony s Nose to stop British ships. The chain weighed 185 tons, links 300 pounds each, and required Welsh miners and Connecticut ox teams to haul. Arnold briefly removed a link, but the chain largely stood, influencing the Burgoyne campaign. parts remain in historical collections, with thirteen links at West Point and a commemorative plate. Also cited is a light anecdote about suffrage primaries from Horace Greeley era humor.
A garbled excerpt presents a bemused Benedict reflecting on money and marriage. The text hints at tensions between love and financial prudence, while a narrator or speaker comments on health and morality in a fragmented, cryptic style.
The piece argues ideals guide actions and shape history from Saratoga to modern life. It contrasts noble aims with greed and glory seeking, citing Philip Schuyler and Benedict Arnold, urging individuals, groups, businesses, schools, and nations to pursue lofty, service oriented ideals over wealth or fame.
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