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This newspaper page contains 27 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Lamar Register
Location
Lamar, Colorado, United States of America
Date
May 02, 1900
Page
2
A brief item notes varied topics including a budgeting theme, a retriever reference, and a lottery and minister plan. The piece presents multiple short items in a column format with brief mentions of objects and roles. The tone resembles a light, quirky domestic page.
In a sharp exchange a man accuses the pawnbroker of stealing his watch. The broker retorts that he runs the shop with moral authority, invoking Moses to justify his conduct. The exchange mirrors a clash of trust and ethics in a small business setting.
A miner woos a minister with a young woman at his house after a wedding. The minister quotes a fee range of two to five dollars. The groom offers to gamble, promising to pay $19 in a year if the union works out, or else nothing.
A joke exchange recounts a man who bought a bulldog puppy for ten dollars and later paid a boy a dollar to drown it. The punchline centers on claiming to have lost more than one hundred percent of the money. The humor hinges on arithmetic hyperbole.
An exchange recalls large crowds on stage with figures of 200 in one instance and 500 in another. The Chicago remark notes they would have reached 1,000 if some mob hadn't rushed outside to confront them.
A grocer questions a new delivery driver about a morning call. The driver recalls the hired girl answering and saying to Mrs Brown that a tramp had arrived. The anecdote, reported by the Indianapolis Sun, captures a sharp social moment in a doorfront exchange.
A brief clashing note from Chicago News and Syracuse Herald on letter warmth. Dobbs advocates genuine warmth in correspondence while Robbs opposes warmth in business letters. a light aside about Jingo and a horseshoe from the Syracuse Herald ends the snippet.
A playful exchange from the Philadelphia Press attributes Sap Hedde’s monocle to limiting what he can comprehend. The dialogue hints at a humorous take on perception and curiosity in a city newspaper tone.
A quirky exchange from Chicago Sambo features joking jabs about injuries, gym rules, and a manager named Jobson. The remarks reveal tension over participation and gender norms in a playful newsroom tone.
Eminent handwriting expert testifies a note writer shows bunco steering instinct by the dash after every J. An eminent attorney asks how the conclusion is reached, and the expert explains the reasoning on the witness stand as reported by the Baltimore American.
A man asks if a fire insurance office sells a policy to cover $20 a week if he loses his job. A spruce young clerk confirms the policy, prompting the quoted exchange.
Plodding Pete questions Meandering Mike about a new alarm clock. Mike says he must use it due to a dream he had last night about working, planning to set it every two or three hours to avoid any chances.
A fragment from New York Weekly depicts a scene where John avoids a Christian invitation to Sunday school while another figure, Wah Lee, derides Christianity and claims the hoodlums have smashed heads. The wording reflects sensational, informal urban dialogue of the era.
Comic strip line from Ally Sloper features Squire and Jorkins discussing a prized retriever. Squire quips the dog would fetch the money he paid if it could, reflecting humor and working-class banter of the era.
A Chicago News quip mocks a playwright's realism by suggesting the wife should creep to the husband’s vest to read pockets. Another joke features a clergyman’s son and a bishop’s retort about a foundation stone laid weekly.
A Philadelphia Press item notes a college professor observing class order as students file in alphabetically led by name. Mr Adams comments on a letter from his son announcing he leads his class. The humor contrasts parental pride with campus routine.
Dialogue from Life showcases Mrs Bingo warning about speaking to the cook. Bingo questions if he was harsh, and Mrs Bingo remarks that anyone would think he was addressing her rather than the cook.
The Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph quotes Mr Goswell saying the season in South Africa is far advanced while his family awaits his explanation in encouraging silence and noting Bloemfontein has had an early fall.
In a rhe toric class a teacher asks how to define a crying need and a solemn young man with a wicked eye answers with a witty handkerchief.
A Detroit Free Press item quotes a playful remark about a Bilinkersdorf girl noted for promptness. The line attributes her quick wit to her father described as a card starter, framing a light society moment.
A terse exchange appears to mockingly discuss Indian reservations. Johnny asks if a reservation is where Indians live until whites want it, provoking debate over policy and language in a quoted dialogue.
Director Merriam stated the government was first to institute a periodic census and today remains the only government to collect and publish general statistics of manufactures.
An ad extols Hostetters Stomach Bitters as a cure for indigestion constipation and dyspepsia. It links degenerate aristocratic trends to unhealthy living and claims the tonic purifies the blood strengthens the stomach and boosts vigor.
Isabel and Blanche are involved in a tense domestic dispute sparked by a secret being revealed. Eleanor blames Isabel for instigating the disclosure while Isabel counters that Eleanor’s instruction not to tell influenced the outcome.
An assortment of old ad copy and snatches mentions a free coupon worth 8 cents with a dollar purchase and a mail order catalog. Also references to Admiral Dewey, Mrs. Dewey, and a Chicago address for agents selling household articles. The text includes stray dialogue about Davie de Courtney and Dabney Dobbs with remarks on love and relatives.
The Pathfider up to Date notes the Union Pacific Overland Limited leaving Denver at 5 pm daily, claiming seven and a half hours quicker service than competing lines between Denver and San Francisco, with Northwest equipment. An enumerated ad and miscellaneous fragments follow, including travel details and unrelated quotes.
Letters from women in Michigan Nebraska and Wisconsin describe relief from female troubles using Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. They report improved menses pain back and abdominal discomfort and return to health after treatment.
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