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This newspaper page contains 16 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Lamar Register
Location
Lamar, Colorado, United States of America
Date
Jun 24, 1903
Page
4
In a candid East Coast setting Eleanor Baldwin debates leaving her comfortable home to pursue teaching in literature or history. Uncle Phin, a guiding mentor, weighs the risks of social disapproval, while Eleanor vows to seek truth and independence with his support and a possible vacancy he may secure.
Col Flaherty, to be manager of the Majestic in New York, recalls barnstorming days. In a Western town, actors doubled in, paraded under a hot sun while dust filled their lungs. An elder resident, idle since 1845, watched and quipped Anything to keep from working.
In a Philadelphia club a group of physicians share humorous tales from their field including a doctor’s tale about a missed medicine order and a joke about a death certificate. A Reading man attempts skating at Crystal Lake but falls, prompted by a boy who mocks him and offers a blunt fix for his skates.
In a crowded theater a man feels two airy feet on his patent leather. He comments politely that she is standing on his feet. The woman replies with surprise then realizes her mistake. She jokes that she thought she was stepping on a block of wood, then excuses herself.
A young woman explains she lowered the gas to save money and jokes with her mother. The mother notes that turning gas off lowers pressure, while the daughter quips that it reduces the waist. The exchange ends with the mother unable to respond.
A wealthy Montreal brewer financed a church and had an inscription claiming it was built at his sole expense and noting his brewing, which college students altered to read a cheeky ambiguity about “This son at his soul's expense. He brews xx,” shifting the meaning to a pun about his brewing.
Judge A A Freeman recalls his post as U S consul to Prague amid loneliness in the ancient Bohemian capital. He laments language barriers and distant customs, noting Prague’s age and landmarks while recounting a visit to a synagogue and worn tombstone inscriptions before resigning his consulship.
Burton Holmes was honored at a hotel reception in an eastern city. A prominent salon hostess mistook the head waiter for the famed lion hunter and invited him to a Sunday afternoon gathering. The waiter's embarrassment and the hostess’s misidentification provide a humorous anecdote of mistaken identity during a lecturer’s visit. The piece blends travelogue wit with a lyrical aside from Youth's Companion.
Frank Les sies Popular Mont Publishing company president F L Colver hosted friends at his Tenafly home when a new mechanical piano attachment misfired. A guest remarked on how humanlike the device seemed, prompting Colver to joke that it needed coaxing to play.
Schwab and Carnegie network to mentor young men, naming 32 year old Benner a president of a corporation at $25,000 salary. Benner, a bachelor, resides in upscale Pierpont apartments in New York as part of Schwab Carnegie & Co. efforts to groom protégés.
Rear Admiral Francis R. Bowles a navy chief constructor and authority on launching introduces a device that lets the ship swing upright to the bow when the christener releases the bottle. The invention aims to ensure a clean break and proper positioning during christening.
A collection of short pieces for youth including a moral on kind words and clean lips, a physics puzzle using a glass jar and sugar, notes on reptiles walking erect, a Newfoundland dog mail carrier tale, an adjective word game, conundrums, a classic necklace trick, and Japan’s Festival of the Dolls with cherry blossoms and dolls display.
Instructions describe building a square style kite from split bamboo with Scotch cambric. The frame is bent backward at top and bottom to bulge outward, kept by twine from upper and lower corners. The breast band is attached as usual and the kite uses two tails, one at each lower corner.
A curious pair of tricks described to light a candle without touching the wick. First, burn so the wick forms a long snuff then puff to extinguish. the rising white smoke can be ignited from a short distance to re-light the wick. Second, dissolve salt in water to create a brine, then fill a tall glass with this solution and plain water, poured gently to avoid disturbance.
A Munich professor demonstrates that passing high voltage through moist air can form nitric acid which yields saltpeter. The process could produce saltpeter at less than a quarter of its current cost. Also a note on pronouncing backache as a simple word.
This piece outlines the butterfly's life stages from caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly. It describes coloring: black body brown antennae reddish orange wings with black veining and white wing margins, and notes the monarch’s milkweed host, nectar color, brush like front legs, and northward migration in fall gathering. It mentions the green milkweed caterpillar, green chrysalis with yellow spots, and the monarch’s bright appearance.
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