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Newspaper
Lamar Register
Location
Lamar, Colorado, United States of America
Date
Jul 25, 1900
Page
3
A fragmented satire of editor style and local scenes, featuring a debate over floral decor language in church, a wary rabies warning from a pitman to a dog owner, roaches frightening a wife, a house-hunting query, and a farmer reflecting on foolish modern trends.
A fragment from the Chicago Record hints at a boastful remark about a well known local man named Gayboy. The speaker claims familiarity with a town figure who is sought for favors and writes with the Ladies. The text is garbled, offering limited clear facts.
In Somerville Journal excerpt a employer congratulates Higgins on his new baby, then warns he must wake early to reach the office on time each day. Higgins thanks the employer, who expresses belief in improved punctuality going forward.
In a Somerville Journal snippet a captious mother questions why her daughter would marry the young man who “doesn't know enough to set the world on fire.” The sensible daughter retorts that he knows enough to kindle the kitchen range, signaling practical optimism over romantic fuss.
A church door notice in Hertfordshire warns that only parish residents may be buried in the churchyard. Those wishing burial must apply to the parish clerk. The notice reflects local church practice and parish authority.
A city officer questions a citizen about residence in a terse exchange. Councilman Bigboddy identifies the citizen as Mary Ann O Brady, who is asked for a cook's name and given directions four streets down and two doors to the right.
A mother scolds her daughter for playing with her brother's toy soldiers and warns she is too old for such play. The daughter retorts she is not playing with common soldiers but with the officers, asserting a distinction between playing with soldiers and officers.
A little girl quotes Colonel Stilwell reacting to brandied cherries sent to cheer him during convalescence. He feared he was not strong enough to eat fruit yet expressed appreciation for the spirit behind the gift.
In a brief exchange, Bingo laments losing the Chippendale chair to a dealer who says a similar piece will take at least a week to become available. Mrs. Bingo expresses disappointment as Mr. Bingo notes the seller must wait for a replacement.
Farmer Greene reports a bunko steerer has run off with Josh Medder’s wife causing community uproar. Judge notes Josh believed bunko steerers were good at heart. Local residents await details and potential legal action.
A playful exchange where a mother notes three cake slices and finds only two. Jack explains the darkness hid the missing pieces, prompting a lighthearted blame on the unseen slices. The dialogue centers on a humorous misunderstanding at home.
A witty exchange from the New York Telegram features a perceptive boarder asking for eggs with the ham and a cross eyed boarder replying that this breakfast is ham and eggless, highlighting a humorous breakfast miscommunication.
Telegraph items report Alaska outbreak of smallpox, large U S Scandinavian population, Japan's war funding, Philippine calls for more troops, Iowa corn prospects, and the President's Washington return amid China tensions. Also fires in Prescott, a large Christian Endeavor gathering in London, and a key NA E A president election.
New York July 19 The appellate division reverses a lower court ruling in the National Protective Association of Steam Fitters and Helpers v Enterprise Association and others. The decision upholds workers' right to choose employers and colleagues, while recognizing employers' right to hire and unions to organize.
The State Department received via the Chinese minister a cable from Minister Conger in Pekin. It states that British legation forces face continued shelling and that quick relief could prevent a general massacre. The message, dated July 18, was sent from Pekin and deemed genuine amid concerns of forgeries.
Omaha dispatch July 20 reports Governor Poynter urging quick Supreme Court action to decide if the Nebraska State Board of Transportation exists and if its order to cut livestock rates can be enforced. Federal Judge Munger earlier issued a temporary injunction against the board, saying the title of the 1859 bill did not authorize the action. The board seeks a ruling to determine constitutionality and potential dissolution or enforcement of rate reductions.
Washington reports a Cabinet agreed policy on China. The United States will not join any partition, will use influence to prevent dismemberment, seeks a voice in settlement, will not declare war now, and will cooperate with other powers to restore order and punish crimes against life while supporting a stable government.
George Shi moon, a Persian student at an Illinois college, received a cablegram from Oroomiah Persia reporting his brother murdered by Mohammedans and a planned massacre of about 3,000 Christians. The message notes rising Mohammedan hostility and fatal hand to hand clashes. Shi moon’s father is a native missionary, fueling local wrath.
Informal decision by the trades association and American Federation of Labor warns of a general walkout, boycott, and suspension of business in Dallas if street railway strike troubles on Consolidated lines are not settled by next Sunday.
Senator Wolcott returns to Colorado as showers fall across the state. Peach Day planned for Grand Junction on September 12. Congressman Champ Clark to lecture at Boulder Chautauqua on the 27th with exMissouri residents expected in Colorado. Fires from long dry spell rise near Book Cliffs. Pueblo severes ties with Western Labor Union amid labor leadership speculation. Governor to appoint a seven member revenue law revision commission, with several named hopefuls. Road plans for a Colorado & Southern branch along the Purgatoire River. Stonewall and Ponil Creek areas targeted. Army of the Philippines reunion set for August 13 in Denver with Eighth Army Corps events. Kinetoscope fire in Glenwood injures operator and damages hotel room but exits are safe. Colorado selects delegates for Pan American congress in Buffalo 1901 and Farmers Congress in Colorado Springs. Sugar beet outlook in Rocky Ford region optimistic. company funds farmers, offers seed money, and reports oversized beets for the Arkansas Valley crop. Rocky Ford factory construction advances with steel and machinery installation underway.
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