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Newspaper
La Crosse Tribune
Location
La Crosse, Wisconsin, United States of America
Date
Dec 01, 1911
Page
3
In a tense October morning Mahaffy hunts Price sparking a deadly confrontation with Fentress and Ware. The planned duel between Mahaffy and Fentress ends abruptly as Mahaffy collapses from a fatal wound, leaving the scene in stunned silence.
A New York Rialto tale describes John Drew at a New England luncheon. Drew, seated beside a boastful tragedian angry at not securing a lead, quips that the critic should join the conspiracy of silence. The bore complains about press neglect as Drew twitches his moustache.
The fragment asks about dockside egg pricing and compares it to President Taft's $50,000 annual pay, querying cabinet salaries. It implies a contrast between commodity prices and high government remuneration without presenting a clear news event.
Rexall 93 Hair Tonic claims to prevent baldness and stimulate hair growth with a 93 percent success rate in tested cases. The ad asserts a full money back guarantee if customers are not entirely satisfied, noting the product is non greasy and pleasant to use, sold at The Rexall Store by O. T. Erhart.
A three year research effort costing over fifty thousand dollars produced Pape's Cell Compound. It claims to end grippe and severe colds within a few doses, without quinine, offering rapid relief from headache fever sneezing stuffed nose and rheumatic pains. A 25 cent package is available from any druggist.
Poem notes a proud Turk who boasted of prowess yet is roasted and served, with mockery of feathers, gravy, and stuffing. The verse frames satire on vanity through playful imagery of being plucked and cooked.
A Chicago lawyer in a eulogy of the late Supreme Court justice recounted John M Harlans habit of sharp observations through stories. He cited a Pittsburg born millionaire pressed by a New York reporter who learned his people moved to Philadelphia after nine years.
Robert Herrick spoke in Chicago on the value of figures in literature. He recounted a building site joke where a foreman asks what they are doing and a worker replies bricks are being laid, prompting the foreman to quip about laying eggs from silence.
Provost Harrison recalls a humorous cash account remark about a millionaire's wife. He cites a $599 charity entry for a Paquin gown embroidered with autumn leaves and fruit to be worn at the next Hallowe'en charity ball, prompting a sharp exchange with her husband.
A noted simple prescription claims remarkable kidney and bladder cures. It instructs mixing six ounces of gin with Murax Compound and Buchu extract, then taking one to two teaspoonfuls after meals and at bedtime to relieve backache and rheumatic joint pain.
Miss Alice G Dexter of Pawtucket Rhode Island is named head designer in a large New England mill It marks her as the youngest woman in the region to hold such a post Her rise comes from self made study at night school after long hours at the same mill where she now works She remains in her twenties and is touted for a bright future
A Montclair party while razing George Innes home found a plaster cast figure by his art. They later learned Innes was a painter, not a sculptor. In New York a chef unearthed a watch from a turkey carcass that remained in good working order.
A police officer intervenes when Prof Branefog, absent minded, carries a joint of beef. He reports mixing up dinner tasks with his wife, leading to the shocking sight of his baby and dog in the oven, with the wife's Sunday hat inside.
A New York clergyman recounts Carrie Nation’s belief in women’s uplifting power. He recalls a clubman who sought a sea voyage to cure his ills, but his physician advised quitting smoking and drinking, prompting the clubman to quip that the doctor sounds like his wife.
Packey McFarland fights Har Lem Tommy Murphy in San Francisco, earning a decision after twenty rounds but failing to KO. McFarland cites a possible right hand fracture, swelling developing after round twelve, while Murphy gains respect for his late rally and resilience. McFarland then heads to New York to face Matt Wells.
A columnist argues that a persistent suitor who refuses to take no for an answer deserves marriage, framing the comment as a pointed social remark. The piece uses sharp tone to critique courting persistence.
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