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This newspaper page contains 25 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Kansas Agitator
Location
Garnett, Kansas, United States of America
Date
Apr 15, 1904
Page
2
A collage of jokes and quips with global and local references. Items mention earthquakes, beet prices, world fairs, Bob Fitzsimmons, Dickens, beer in Chicago, trolley accidents, and a mix of humorous notices about politicians, professors, and newspapers.
A man at a New York roulette wheel faced a murder threat and narrowly escaped. The incident reflects the era’s blunt dangers. authorities report the suspect’s motive remains unclear while the victim survives unharmed.
Lawrence professor B Haworth of Kansas University describes the Iola Humboldt Chanute and Erie oil and gas regions. He notes productive zones around Kansas City and Paola, depths to gas sands, uneven sand distribution, and current lower lease prices amid a market oversupply.
The article describes rapid oil and gas development in eastern Kansas, noting 1,000 wells within the Topeka region and ongoing drilling at over fifty new wells monthly. It highlights Cherokee shale gas sources, Mississippian limestone layers, and the Humboldt and Chanute districts as major hubs with substantial field activity and associated refinery operations.
A London cabman known for sharp repartee silenced a rival with a punning retort. He quipped that the other man was unfit to drive a keb and not fit to command a Russian battleship, highlighting the era’s clipped slang and humor.
No meat appears at breakfast in Austria and Germany where por is seldom used and prepared certals are popular in America. Wheat rolls and rye bread form the staple breakfast foods.
A Cork street scene features a respectable man walking with a tame goose that follows him through busy avenues. The bird is noted to drink porter with evident relish.
A quirky note compares walnut kernel folds to brain convolutions, joking that when a man’s brain is off center one might be “nutty.” The piece playfully blends humor with literary flourishes from New York prose.
A money lender's clerk testifying in a London court described his job as a financial surveyor. The mispronunciation or misspelling cited suggests the witness intended the term financial surveyor, indicating confusion about the occupation during testimony.
An albatross has trailed a vessel for two months with no sight of its keeper, Lover, alighting or appearing. The bird's prolonged vigil showcases remarkable endurance and loyalty to the ship, drawing attention from maritime observers.
Pitchblende supplies dwindle as Austrian mines yielding radium face shortages. Experts warn impact on industry and medical research amid limited ore access and rising prices.
A manufacturer unveils a new piano described as about twice as tall as a standard piano yet only half as thick. The inventor says the Cory Plat Piano meets a longfelt demand and fits snugly in small spaces.
A garbled quotation recalls a dentist extraction where Margie describes the tug with large pliers and the tooth finally coming out just as she feared. The exchange captures a child's dramatic memory of a routine dental procedure.
A brief, humorous exchange between Bobby and Willie Woodby after Sunday school about visiting Mrs Woodby. Willie jokes his mother was unavailable, implying she mistook him for the installment man. The dialogue reflects small town banter and child wit.
In a terse exchange Merchant notes his nervous partner fears Burroughs will appear to repay debt or borrow more. The conversation reveals a failing trust and a missed payment while Ependera confesses an attempted raise lacked a stamp to mail it, leaving obligations unsettled.
An informal exchange reveals a camouflaged acquaintance questions the deadbeat about lodging. He admits to stopping at a hotel but insists he did not actually put up there, implying stealth or avoidance of claim. The terse dialogue hints at evasive behavior during a town visit.
A terse rustic scene unfolds as Dusty proclaims self sufficiency and hostility erupts with a glass eater and a proprietor. The Wild Man questions the manager s salary while a stranger learns of local poverty and a census revealing half a shoat per man in the county.
A narrator laments in playful terms that the Garden of Eden could be seen as the original resort. The remark blends satire with a theatrical mood, suggesting paradise as a grand retreat.
A historic notice warns that deafness cannot be cured except by restoring the eustachian tube function. It describes risks of irreversible hearing loss if the tube remains inflamed and blocked, with a medical process claimed to rehabilitate the hearing mechanism.
A Berlin newspaper reports that out of 120 wars in 1700 to 1870, 110 began without a formal declaration. The piece highlights informal approaches to war and contrasts official and unofficial practice.
A 1904 contest rewards 25 round trip tickets to the St Louis Exposition. In Iowa Nebraska Kansas Missouri, five winners from each state will be selected for sending 4 ten cent 16 oz Defiance cold water starch trade marks. Mail by Sept 1904 to Omaha Nebraska. Tickets sent by registered mail September. Defiance starch promotes 16 oz per package and no sticking to iron. Available from all dealers.
The Southern railway proposes annual passes for engineers and conductors. Staff with ten years receive division-wide passes, while fifteen years earns passes for their wives. The plan covers personnel in service and those with long service credit.
The Philippine bishop and former Japan missionary declares that Japan is a nation without religion. He says Shintoism is a historic relic, once central to tradition, now a venerable ruin. He also calls Buddhism defunct as a living religion or guiding philosophy.
W Jennings of Hampton Wick England recently collected prize money awarded for service as a second class boy on HMS Archer during the 1854 action against Russian warships. The old general dealer had forgotten the funds until the admiralty payment arrived, surprising the recipient.
An Ohio soldier recalls a stomach and bowels disease that doctors called incurable. After hospital care and years of medicine, Grape Nuts cereal cured him, enabling weight gain and daily work. He credits Postum Co. and the cereal for his recovery and hints medical men might have prescribed it earlier.
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