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Newspaper
Greeley Tribune
Location
Greeley, Colorado, United States of America
Date
Jan 06, 1886
Page
7
A humorous scene shows a suitor asking a woman to marry him while debating the fate of a poodle and a cat. The pair joke about giving up pets as fate dictates they wait. Burdette offers a playful poem about the early bird and the worm.
A lively Nebraska woman recounts learning manners in Boston east of the prairies. She laughs at side saddles and corsage rigging while insisting she will ride her way or not at all, preserving her blunt frontier spirit.
A playful verse from Texas Siftings notes a milkman enjoying his work as pails are filled at dawn. It comments on a small rise in milk prices and wanders through 19th century literary figures in a humorous tone.
Connecticut man visits a southern town soon after Johnston's surrender. He endures insults and a forced challenge ending in a duel at twenty paces. He shoots a man’s shoulder, survives, and remains, later becoming postmaster for five years as locals grow to like him.
An incident at the Lime Kiln Club features Brother Gardner narrowly avoiding danger and recounting an assassination attempt. The club passes new rules for winter conduct, including fines for loud talking and handling relics, with a cautious mood after a member’s death in a later toast.
AHarper s Weekly excerpt notes a Austrian paper apologizing to readers for a delay in the next issue while promising a Saturday release. The piece contrasts this with American editors who delay announcements after press trouble and brag of rapid efforts to publish.
At a San Francisco and North Pacific line stop an elderly man objected to a station assistant smashing a trunk. The worker insisted he owned the railroad, asserting authority as he confronted the passenger. The elderly man stepped back as Dona nue moved the train on.
The druggists Flower and Petrikin claim dominance in trade by offering Bosanko's Cough and Lung Syrup priced at 50 cents and 1.00. They tout it as the best medicine for coughs colds croup and primary consumption with free samples.
Berrao reports Andrew J. Morrison of the city patents a captive balloon, stationed at intervals, with a passenger or freight car gliding along a cable incline between stations. The plan foresees rising and lowering balloons to move cars, with brakes to stop. Time will tell if the scheme proves practical or visionary.
Judge David Key recalls a mountain candidate famed for no fixed opinions who faced a school tax question. A shouted prompt during his sheriff bid forced a blunt reply: if good, for it. if bad, against it.
A New York Sun transcript shows counsel pressing a witness who refuses to swear the witness was breathing like a porpoise, citing repeated confusion and a humorous exchange about hearing a “porpoise breave.”
A well known local wag begins a prank near Nicollet avenue by startling a sleepy coachman in a dry goods store front yard. He opens the carriage and the driver musters a surprised salute before the prank ends with the wag bidding “Home.” The rest of the details remain a mystery to onlookers and the carriage mistress.
In a New England village a clerical club hosts a tale about Rav Dr Clarke who preached total abstinence. The hostess admits brandied peaches at supper and debates change. The essayist sitting near her takes a second helping and she offers more peaches while he replies he will only have a little more of the gravy.
Prof Williams former Delaware State Chemist tested Red Star Cough Cure and found no morphia or opium. He endorses its efficacy and recommends giving it to children. Available for 25 cents.
A small shop operation is located in the rear of Clark and Randolphs Grocery Store in Greeley Colorado. The listing notes available goods and directions for shoppers seeking the rear entrance.
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