Packing Index Lesson From an Old Grocer Joke
Explorer Peary struggles with learning in life and trade as he recalls an old grocer in Cresson. A joke about barrels marked A and Z illustrates differing customer needs for opening at the top or bottom.
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Newspaper
Glenwood Opinion
Location
Glenwood, Iowa, United States of America
Date
May 07, 1908
Page
6
Explorer Peary struggles with learning in life and trade as he recalls an old grocer in Cresson. A joke about barrels marked A and Z illustrates differing customer needs for opening at the top or bottom.
State Senator John S Fisher of Pennsylvania recounts a tale of a stubborn Indiana county farmer who after bringing a stack of Supreme Court decisions to a tax office encounter, is told that even if the high court has not yet reversed itself, judgment will be against his client, illustrating legal skepticism of bold precedents.
A veteran colonel hardened by Civil War and Indian campaigns, the Arctic, the Spanish War, and the Philippine insurrection, resents promotions of younger officers. In the Philippines, an officer parades a monkey who learns the manual of arms, and a cautious remark hints the War Department might promote the animal to brigadier general.
A foreign correspondent recalls interviewing Alfred Vanderbilt in Paris. He discusses Vanderbilt’s coaching run to be made this summer from London to Brighton, and the cautionary tale about seating for a heavier traveler on a Brighton coach.
A Northbound journey humor ensues as Lord Rosebery, wrapped in a fur rug and cap, sits in a first class smoking carriage. A passenger prompts if he objects to smoking. the “lady” signals no, and Rosebery soon reveals the cigar himself, surprising the wary traveler.
Senator Allison proposes ordering two battleships annually until the Navy reaches strength, a policy praised by colleagues after his Senate address on April 27. He met with President Roosevelt in the Kite House, and the plan, debated amid party lines, was adopted with broad support. Public congratulations followed, including from Senator Beveridge.
Carrell state auditor and gubernatorial candidate opened his Cambridge campaign warning of an empty treasury if last assembly appropriations are spent in the biennium. He cited 1901–present receipts and disbursements, reported a five year deficit of 816,632.30 and cash of 35,599 with warrants of 139,801 outstanding.
The piece argues Governor Cummins did not lead rate legislation but joined a long developing movement. It recalls 1902 efforts by Senator Trewin to empower the Interstate Commerce Commission, and contends Cummins only spoke when sentiment was clear, while earlier he backed railroad interests and opposed the two-cent fare.
Prouty and Bryan discuss a great crisis facing the American republic in a decisive year. They critique the Republican party, accusing it of government control by privileged interests. Each man expresses confidence in victory for his view as the nation faces the internal struggle.
Hon G S Gilbertson, leading Cummins campaign, urges Scandinavian voters to oppose Senator Allison over his stance on the Aldrich bill amendment by Senator Winute Nelson of Minnesota. Critics condemn the appeal as prejudiced while praising Allison as a prudent and influential U S senator and a guide in the chamber.
In a Senate Interstate Commerce session, Cummins questions low rail rates for butter and eggs to eastern markets. The chairman presses for fair adjustments while Cummins argues producers do not gain from the cheap rates as consumer prices fall. The exchange centers on whether markets can supply eastern demand at favorable terms.
Governor Cummins addresses Mt Ayr in Ringgold County Iowa denying outlandish claims about his stance on rail rates and interstate commerce reform. He criticizes rumors linking Iowa to higher cretes and misstates travel routes, urging clarity on state and national policy.
An illustrated guide to four Easter egg ideas each named and described. No. 1 uses a cabbage rose surface with green tissue accents for a pretty breakfast table display. No. 2 depicts an Aunt Nan with white lawn cap and potato shoulder block, painted features. No. 3 creates a jolly chappin with sewed straw and paper collar, bright facial colors. No. 4 renders a fat baby face from a small end up egg with hood and flaxen hair, detailed eye and lip work.
Mrs. M. J. Gabbett recalls Easter in Rome with the lighting of St. Peter's fire, the holy oil washing, trumpet signals, and bells from 408 churches. The organ swells as the crowd hears Ring out the darkness of the land and Ring in the Christ that is to be. She calls the experience a breathtaking relief after Passion week.
In Florence on July Saturday a chariot drawn into the square before the cathedral holds bundles of powder linked by a fuse. A wire runs from the chariot to the high altar and a toy dove is released by the archbishop. The dove travels the wire and, if it reaches the chariot, signals a propitious year. if it stalls, misfortune is foretold.
A new novelty for Easter weddings features the bride’s bouquet replaced by a prayer book. Three ribbon markers lie between the leaves, their ends draping to the gown’s hem, tied with double bowknots to create a shower effect like traditional bouquets.
New York's Easter collection totals about 250000 across over 400 churches in the metro area. Last Easter twenty of the larger churches gathered 2000 each, seventy five averaged about 50, and the rest yielded far less than 50 per church.
A fragment notes a Lincol nsure saying catkins must bloom by the fifth Sunday of Lent or expect a poor season. Willow branches with catkins are used where palmetto palms cannot be procured, reflecting rural folk belief.
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