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Newspaper
Fremont Eagle
Location
Fremont, Indiana, United States of America
Date
Apr 19, 1917
Page
8
A humorous exchange describes a farm cow advertised as perfectly sound and able to supply milk, yet priced low because the cow allegedly speaks like a dinner horn and lures workers away with its clattering voice. The piece characteristically blends rural wit with mock skepticism.
A Cincinnati authority touts freezone as a safe quick cure for corns and calluses. A few drops applied directly to the tender area supposedly removes the corn root and soreness, drying and shriveling the corn with minimal irritation to surrounding skin. A small bottle from any drug store is claimed to cost little and work reliably.
A quip notes a patient’s doctor ordered diet shift to stop potatoes, prompting a joke about saving for a car. The exchange pivots on frugality and a humorous twist about dietary limits enabling purchase plans.
An ad promises removal of freckles using ethine double strength bought from a druggist with nightly and morning applications. It claims rapid fading of freckles and a nearly clear complexion, with a one ounce supply enough for most. Includes a money back guarantee if it fails. Also mentions Red Cross Ball Blue laundry aid and Canadian and U S export figures.
Indianapolis Governor James P. Goodrich names a 24 member military staff for his administration. Eight hold honorary colonel ranks, eight lieutenant colonel, eight major. Appointees span Indianapolis New York City Evansville Terre Haute and other communities. A staff organization and a chief of staff are anticipated.
Indianapolis reports G. I. Christie of Purdue University was appointed state food director by Governor Goodrich to mobilize Indiana food resources and ensure all plantable ground is used. The governor spoke at a conference of Indiana city mayors about preventing severe food shortages.
Miami County farmers form a two district organization led by president L. V. Dowd with Irvin Ficher as vice president and Vernon B. Overman as secretary. The group aims to boost county food output and is directed by Omer Holman of the Peru Chamber of Commerce.
HOOSIER NOTES reports in South Bend that restaurants removed the word German from menus, labeling the dish Yankee fried potatoes. Jeffersonville notes Sunday work at the quartermasters depot with Colonel W. B. Wood leading an officers reserve corps examining board. The Jeffersonville Ministers Association secured a vacant storeroom for a soldiers rest and recreation home. Indianapolis reports women organizing to assist federal employment agencies if needed. Shelbyville marks a twenty one gun salute as a new American flag rises at a plant. Greensburg names R. C. Willoughby assistant to Frederick E. Shortemler, secretary to Senator Harry S. New. Evansville covers the eighteenth annual state convention of the Master Horse Shoers Association with about 200 delegates. Bourbon closes public schools due to scarlet fever. Terre Haute reports Fred McClood, seventeen, accidentally killed his fourteen year old sister while handling a .32 caliber rifle.
Article urges to prevent premature old age by reducing kidney strain. It explains that kidney degeneration causes auto intoxication leading to early death. Advises drinking plenty of pure water and taking Anuric before meals to dissolve uric acid and support long life.
Paddy laughs in a corner by the pot house fire as he boasts of a deal. He says he traded Murphy the old mare for a cartload of hay. The neighbor questions the value of hay if the mare is gone, while Paddy gleefully explains Murphy will lend back the mare to eat.
A pamphlet style ad cites thousands learning weekly that Petersons Ointment cures eczema and piles. Letters claim dramatic relief after one box with testimonials from Mrs Mary Hill and B Ruger. Also ends with a moral vignette about Gertrude and her mother over a garden ants scene.
A family bickering exchange features a mother and child debating sweet treats for dinner. The dialogue highlights simple dessert cravings with lingering humor about candy and cake options.
Naval surgeon Dr. R G Holcomb warns that crowded ship quarters and variable hours raise health risks. He notes higher exposure to storms and accidents may increase respiratory diseases and other injuries among sailors. Spain and possessions last year sold to the United States goods valued at 85,458,877 dollars.
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