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Newspaper
Freeport Journal
Location
Freeport, Illinois, United States of America
Date
Apr 13, 1881
Page
8
A collage of brief anecdotes, jokes, medical ads, travel notes, and offhand observations. It references Brigham Young, Carlyle etchings, patent remedies, Wood preservation, and historical quips, with dated notices and local humor.
A non stimulating vegetable diet plus outdoor exercise is proposed to restore health. The diet lists hygienic menus from milk and fruit to fish and porridge and details general rules to avoid stimulants, eat unspiced foods, and finish meals three hours before bed.
A Buffalo Courant cartoonish reminiscence recalls a Fifth Avenue scene with a “rosebud” and her austere aunt. The aunt gasps at a skirt’s length and hooped era style, exclaiming that such dress shows way too much. The girl quips she is dressed for it, while the aunt protests with scandalized disbelief.
The piece urges energetic work ethic praising immediate initiative and loyalty to employers. It cites George Washington and a Russian emperor as examples, then reports a Norwich based suit alleging infringement of a cartridge making process worth about £500,000. It notes A H Almy and the Norwich Arms company helped develop cartridge methods and that 70 million cartridges have been produced.
A Paris butcher in Que Daguerre notices first cuts of meat vanish until a large watchful dog prompts him to investigate. The dog’s mistress is found cutting meat at home and confesses the animal had supplied her for a year, with the butcher having her arrested.
A Parisian diner leaves a poor restaurant after a poor meal and tells the owner I hope we never meet again with the line embrace me. The owner reacts with surprise and humor as the guest claims a final farewell.
A humorous, lengthy sequence of satirical calculations from various papers mocks competing guesses on how many apples Adam and Eve shared. The pieces riff on biblical figures and use numeric wordplay to lampoon theories and pundits, ending with a political aside about Hoadley and party principles.
Jacob N Bloomer of Virgile New York reports heavy swelling relief from Dr Thomas Eclectic Oil in forty eight hours for his son. He adds one application eased a very sore toe and twenty four hours cured his wife's inflamed foot enabling walking.
Echoes of a fading era touts Spring Blossom as a remedy for biliousness indigestion and stomach ache. The ad promises a 60 cent bottle with trial bottles at 10 cents, highlighting limited medicine availability and persuasive language of the time.
A reader cites six years of bed ridden illness costing 1200 dollars, halted by three Hop Bitters bottles used by his wife. He praises her work since, while other odd anecdotes follow about an engine god offering and a potter in Limb, plus a strange wind reversal from ashes.
Advertises prices for The Journal and Weekly New York Tribune and invites local correspondence from responsible parties to share county happenings.
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