Painter and Carpenter Exchange Two Foot Rule
A painter and a carpenter trade a quip about a two foot rule in a Chicago News brief. The painter offers the rule and the carpenter demands it, with a playful jab about footwear.
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Newspaper
Farmington Enterprise
Location
Farmington, New Mexico, United States of America
Date
Jan 31, 1908
Page
6
A painter and a carpenter trade a quip about a two foot rule in a Chicago News brief. The painter offers the rule and the carpenter demands it, with a playful jab about footwear.
A minister says God gave Helen-Ma to her parent, but the mother counters with a claim she heard that the court gave custody to the other parent, sparking tension in a family dispute.
The father questions the girl about drinking smoking gambling and swearing. She replies she never drinks smokes never gambles and has never uttered an oath. The exchange centers on her noted abstinence.
Thomas F. Ryan discusses music in a Deutschland smoke room noting native forms like bagpipes. He jokes on how a piper moves constantly while playing and a visitor recalls a street performer whose purpose is to keep away cobblestones.
A struggling writer faces critics from the Chicago Tribune who praised his latest novel Naggus-Whys as uplifting. He complains that despite the acclaim he has not sold a single copy.
A college professor confronts a front row student who always ignores lectures. The student calmly replies that he already has his father's notes, explaining his lack of personal note taking.
The hot mineral water and vapor caves at Glenwood Springs cure rheumatism blood poisoning eczema and all diseases of the blood. Special reduced winter rates for railroad hotel accommodations and baths can be arranged for those desiring a course of treatment. For particulars apply to Inquiry Department The Glenwood Hot Springs Company Henwood Springs Colorado.
An advertisement claims a distinct advance in dental science including saved loose teeth cured pyorrhea and gum diseases and replacement of missing teeth with plates or bridgework. Free booklet from Rex Dental Company at 728 Sixteenth Street Denver.
A dialogue mocks social pretenses as a wife jokes about a disinfection obsessed mother and a husband named Fitz Jones. A Defiance Starch ad touts strong, thinly applied starch for laundry. The National Syndicate of Railway Men in France pushes a ten year old measure with 400000 petition post cards to the president of the senate.
An assorted newspaper fragment touts Hall's Catarrh Cure as a constitutional remedy with a $100 payout offer and lists Defiance Starch praised for fabric care and laundering. The piece cites endorsements, a joke exchange, and other health and household product pitches.
A Rural New Yorker reader describes using compressed air powered spray rigs tied to a high water pressure system. An airtight pressure tank fills with water to compress air, then air pressure drives spray through nozzles. Large charging tanks and multiple field tanks improve strength and consistency. slow water pressure may be aided by a force pump or gas tube.
Southern Illinois correspondent notes white clay and gray silt loam soils best suit orchards though drainage and location matter. Stable manure and cowpeas improve worn land. clay and elevated sites favor peaches with manure, pruning, and careful wood control. Bottom lands overflow hinder, but fertilization and drainage can salvage cold wet soils.
C G Winn of Pike County argues in Prairie Farmer that ridge line orchards outperform valley locations. He notes temperature differentials between ridges and ravines during spring freezes and late cold winds as the key to bloom survival and better results over the past 15 years.
Readers learns about underutilized crops like cardoon chervil root onions and callard greens. guidance covers growing blanched hearts in celery fashion and the need for variety, plus notes on kohlrabi as a German favorite and sowing schedules for season-long harvests.
A lively collection of short items includes a neighborly chicken scheme, a Cuban Itch remedy success story, lace industry notes in Nottingham, starch laundering tips, a Nottingham anecdote about crime and doom, a nerve tonic advertisement, a moral quip on wisdom, and a closing witticism about coaxing a girl to sing.
A three sided standard of 2x14 is driven into the ground to lift a large tree. The tree is wrapped at its base with carpet, ropes tie the cross piece to the trunk, and a horse pulls the standard to slide the tree onto a sled for relocation.
Farmers should grade apples for sale to improve prices with high quality fruit. Remove dead limbs and burn diseased trees to prevent pest spread. New trees require mulch during drought and thorough soaking at dusk to avoid harm from watering.
The text notes plants alter traits with growing conditions, with artificial varieties like wheat and cabbage showing pronounced shifts. It cites a Tennessee experiment where protein rich wheat shifted to starch as leaves expanded in a wet year, highlighting the difficulty of controlling such changes in artificially bred crops.
Edmonton firefighters report mischief from the new fire alarm boxes as a youth fondles a letter then tries to push it into a box. A bystander warns that the proper box is at the next corner while humor about exasperated citizens appears in the anecdote.
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