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Newspaper
Farmington Enterprise
Location
Farmington, New Mexico, United States of America
Date
Jan 08, 1909
Page
2
The Farmington Enterprise column mocks trends and public issues, mentioning Alfred Austin, Uranium ore research by the Vienna Academy of Sciences, Zeppelin wealth for airship experiments, Africa expeditions, armoured cruisers, and a late curfew ordinance. It reads as a satirical, rambling mix of global topics and local quips.
An American man sues his wife for divorce claiming cruel treatment from a meal joke at a club. In England a Cambridge senior wranglership honors a young Russian Jew, with Selig Brodetsky bracketed for the math blue riband alongside Ibbotson of Pembroke.
The Postal Progress League secretary envisions a time when rural delivery brings electric power for tools, freight and passenger transport, and provides telegraph and telephone service to the source communities. Stranger dreams have materialized in this vision of expanded services.
Pennsylvania Railroad mechanics have equipped 17 locomotives in the Pittsburgh yards with hose and pumping gear to operate as fire engines. A signaling system exists to summon the engines when needed.
Richard Croker notes that two thirds of visitors he met in Egypt hailed from America. He claims they sustain locals both in hotels and on the streets, and that Egyptians beg for money constantly from birth, with every child seeming to ask for back sheesh.
The word vaudeville stems from Val de Vire ballads in Normandy where Oliver Bas séUn flourished. These sprightly tunes formed the vaudeville entertainment, long evolving into dance, acrobatics, sketches, and theatrical acts as shown by references to Johnny Hayes and marathon lore.
The text notes that a majority of voters chose violet as Illinois state flower in a school or legislative process. It suggests thirty three states have official flowers, chosen by children or law, contrasting with the rose as New York’s flower and implying differing purposes.
The Lycee women’s club in Paris grows from a fragile start to a thriving institution with 700 members. Duchess d Uzes leads as president. Miss Alice Williams helped establish it in Paris after London support. Sections on sociology and humanitarian work foster women from abroad seeking a home and community.
Mrs. Montgomery Spranglin loses her engagement ring in a hall after a social evening. Jonas Beverly hunts the missing diamond while a poor boy relies on Beverly and Spranglin to aid his sick mother. The diamond is found in the mud and linked to a family history, ending with the ring reset for charity.
Nat Anderson of Greenwood describes five years of dull backache progressing to severe kidney trouble with disordered secretions and urinary issues. He credits Dean's Kidney Pills with relief and a full recovery, noting improved strength and no remaining kidney symptoms after use. Sold by all dealers for 56 cents a box from Foster Milburn Co Buffalo NY.
Adoniram Corntop laments how times have changed since courtin days. He recalls costs for dates, ice cream, and mint treats, noting his son spent a dollar and more on a band outing. He warns of 75 cents spent on a gal in a single day.
Local remarks hint at plans to uplift farmers with new measures. Wry questions arise about what tools will be used and how they affect agricultural communities.
In Scot land Sir Alexander Ramsay builds a grand estate and new machinery for threshing, windowing, circular sawing, hay pressing and oat rolling in a barnyard. An old worker Robby watches and muses on Solomon.
A girl misremembers a church sermon about sowing and reaping, then, after watching a seamstress transform old fashion garments, she loudly misstates the saying as What you sew in the winter you shall rip in the summer.
The passage asserts that nothing innocent or good truly dies and is forgotten. An infant’s memory endures in the loved and acts again through them in the world’s redemption.
A distressed reader describes a lifelong heavy coffee habit and its link to nervous spells. The ill stock man, now 56, notes he began suffering about three years ago as coffee reportedly hurt his health.
A fragment describes babies and onlookers as someone notes they arrived during the event. The speaker remarks I stopped praying or there’s of them, capturing a tense, unresolved moment in a crowded setting.
A Yonkers Stateman item quotes a man asking a girl if she cares for children and a sharp exchange follows with the girl asserting she runs her own business as a nurse. The piece comments on relationships and deception in a brief, wry tone.
A story features Jol teasing his grandfather about his Civil War experiences. Jol asks if he endured battles and shellfire, and the grandfather confirms with brief, matter of fact replies, prompting Jol to humorously label him a fine dodger.
Jamie begs for more preserves and recalls his grandfather’s rule. The father reflects on his own childhood and then Jamie asks if he is glad they live together now.
In a comic exchange from Harper's Weekly, Bobby worries his mother plans to rub him out as she scrubs him in the suds. She reassures him with patient maternal care, downplaying the concern as a child's misunderstanding.
A humorous exchange contrasts traditional marriage with modern search methods. A man suggests a married woman seeking her own husband may venture to a club, while the woman questions the premise, highlighting social norms around romance and matchmaking.
A visitor staying with a family promised to send a candy bar to Margaret seven. She asked him to write name and address on a card but then suggested sending it to her father instead. She quipped that her father would not dare eat it because papa is a dentist.
In a blunt exchange, Badger admits paying $25 to a doctor for a diagnosis and prescription. The friend teases that he could have avoided the expense with stronger will. The Chicago Tribune quotes the dialogue.
A sharp exchange between a young physician and an older doctor pivots on medical ethics and wealth. The dialogue contrasts money with medical principle, asserting that purity and duty shape a legacy for future generations.
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