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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Jun 12, 1903
Page
4
A compilation of witty quips and short notes from the Emmons County Record. The piece cites jokes about libel laws in Philadelphia, Russia and New Chwang troop drills, telephone bosses, Chicago laundry strikes, President Diaz’s age, Mayor Ames’ sentence, and state liquor status, ending with a remark on paying Colombia for the canal strip.
A satirical collage cites an eastern capitalist's million dollar bluff, Russo-Japanese war prep, Armour heirs tax, and a Paris Zola statue while mocking rapid modern life and a divorce suit claiming a science healer broke up the home. The piece ends with a quip on the home matter.
A collage of brief notes: William E. Watt mocks Shakespeare as a cheap punster, an Omaha injunction on a talker prompts reflection on punishment in homes, Russian counts delay Macedonia pressure, Philadelphia cartoonist seeks satisfaction with Gov Pennybacker, Venice begins St Mark campanile reconstruction, a Baltimore housewife finds a $50 bill in tomatoes, more families buy canned tomatoes, Illinois glass bottle makers’ bluff over child labor law requires compliance.
In the death of Biff Hall, observers note the tragedy exposes the absence of a brighter example in plain common court justice, prompting discussions on public accountability and legal fairness.
Consul Bellows reports plague in Yokohama while Goodnow notes Shanghai delays affecting Chinese exhibits for St Louis world’s fair. Mindoro expedition seeks white colony. Minna Williams alias May Parker awaits surrender in London. Ex senator Hechelin warned from Finland by governor Bobwkff. Mrs Keppel traps burglars in London with $5,000 jewelry. Standard Oil accused of inching toward Baku. Pall Mall Gazette man Fournier inherits £1.5 million. Heine to be prosecuted over cartoonmatic praise of Stars and Stripes.
Capt C Webster Wilson a retired naval officer died in Baltimore. He commanded a vessel in Admiral Farragut's Mobile Bay fleet during the Civil War. Col Charles G Burr a prominent attorney died in Columbus Ohio age fifty five from blood poisoning caused by an insect bite. James L Evans died in Noblesville Indiana aged seventy eight. elected to Congress in 1874 and served three terms. Maj E B Kirk retired army officer died at his Toledo home after several weeks illness. He served throughout the Civil War with a brilliant regular army record.
Two Icelandic fishermen Johnson and Thorkenson drowned in Lake Manitoba near Winnipeg. A storm toppled part of an elm tree at the old Lincoln homestead. Frank Jenner & Co. and eight other Brooklyn buildings burned, loss $100,000. Mrs Countess of Meridianville and a servant killed by lightning. two daughters survived. Central Iron and Steel boiler plate mills at Harrisburg destroyed by fire, loss $200,000, many job losses. Seaboard Air Line shops at Norfolk burned, loss $1,000,000. one man nearly cremated. Mon tana board of sheep commissioners reports 900,000 sheep lost in blizzards, total since December 1.5 million, value about $3,750,000 at $2.50 each.
Prince Henry of Prussia visits King Alfonso while conflicts ease after Bolivian battles on April 24. A Bristol crowd tragedy injures many as a motorcycle crashes. Pedro Diaz faces execution in San Juan for a 1902 riot murder. Princess Louise of Tuscany may seek seclusion in Austria. Berlin doctor touts tea as rheumatism cure after 500 trials. Bowen meets Castro in La Guaira, declines reception. British stage actors oppose child labor ban. Montreal strike clash injures two motormen. Belgium’s M Capazza builds an Atlantic-crossing airship with Elisee Reclus. Theodor Rickman dies in Marbach after U.S. tour. Froham acquires rights to Der Hochtourist for London and New York. Euclid Park National Bank formed from Euclid Avenue and Park National of Cleveland.
A sprawling list of crime trials suicides and deaths spans cities from Colorado Springs to St. Louis. Accusations touch officials C J St John in Colorado and Amos Leedy in Oklahoma while others report burglaries post office robberies and family duels. A mix of arrests missing persons and notable deaths including Col Bob Ammon in New York and General Thomas F. Dewar in Cincinnati anchor the roundup.
Ohio Republicans closed their state convention naming Myron T. Herrick for governor Warren G. Harding for lieutenant governor Marcus A. Hanna for another Senate term Harmony and Hands off were the campaign cries. Hanna supported Herrick, while the party endorsed Roosevelt's nomination and Foraker praised the results.
Washington June 6 The Machen bribery case against August W Machen former head of free delivery post office department was presented to the federal grand jury. Witnesses named include Andrew M McBath inspector Mayer and Eckloff cashier of the Second National Bank with secrecy surrounding witnesses still maintained.
St John N B June 4 reports reach city that Masquash on the seacoast has been swept by forest fires leaving only three or four buildings. About 200 people are homeless and destitute with losses exceeding 100000 dollars. Fires threaten other villages. at Piccaddilly two men perished attempting to save cattle.
London dispatches say Turks conduct searches for arms in Adriapole villages and punish refugees. Bulgarian bands attack Turks in several clashes with fatalities. A Greek notable near Sarakina was crucified after a ransom was not paid.
Flood notices from St Louis and Kansas City report the Mississippi and Missouri rivers receding and a better outlook. In St Louis the Mississippi rose to 8.7 feet with driftwood and submerged buildings, while Venice Illinois faces imminent inundation. Kansas City indicates rapid river falls, guarded districts, and a shift to rehabilitation planning in Topeka.
In Wilkesbarre Pennsylvania on June 6 reports say the strike mood is easing as miners prepare to meet in Pottsville within ten days. Coal company officials indicate if the miners re elect the three district presidents to the conciliation board by majority vote no further objections to their eligibility would remain.
The Russian press argues Russia should be seen as sympathetic to the United States and proposes publishing in English a sketch of relations to explain Russia's aims. They aim to influence American readers and foster a sympathetic movement for Russia in the United States.
Gainesville Georgia mayor Parker issued a grim citywide briefing after the storm. He predicted 125 deaths within the next day, about 300 wounded with some to die, 400 houses destroyed, and about 1500 homeless. Financial losses could reach $600000 with continued need for funds and physicians.
From Belgrade on June 6 meets a single verified fact a palace scullion died by suicide a week earlier over a love affair. No confirmation that King Alexander's French cook killed himself for attempting queen Draga poisoning.
Cable from Canton reports Gov Wong says over six million natives in Kwang-s are starving and seek relief through American and British missionaries. Secretary Hay received the message via Consul MecWade in Canton.
Washington reports that Fenner B. Baker of Oxford Mississippi was fined 50 dollars and costs and sentenced to six months in jail for offering Assistant Postmaster General Bristow 50 dollars for a postmaster appointment.
In St Joseph Michigan on June 6 Captain John D Bean of the schooner H M Avery died attempting to rescue his wife who had been thrown into the water after the steamer Puritan collided with and wrecked the Avery.
Knoxville dispatch reports James Green killed James Harris at Dossett Tennessee in a dispute over one cent. Green used a shotgun and is jailed at Clinton.
San Francisco June 4 The cruiser Tacoma was launched last evening in the Union Iron Works ship yards in front of several thousand spectators including a delegation from Washington State.
President Roosevelt wrapped up his Danville stop after a brief 20 minute visit despite rain. He then departed by train at 6 40 to Indianapolis and on to Washington. In Sioux City a drowning accident left six year old Emmett Livermore dead and his father gravely ill after a boat capsize near home.
In Menomonie Wisconsin on June 6 David Adams of Downsville was raising heavy timbers for a house when one fell and struck him from behind. He died two hours later.
In Monroe Wisconsin on June 4 Mrs Anna M Noggie of ( unreadable ) and Mrs Hiram Johnson of Omaha celebrated their eighty eighth birthday anniversary yesterday here. The two women, claimed as the oldest twins in the United States, marked a long life together with family and friends in attendance.
The lieutenant governor of the Transvaal Sir Arthur Lawley remits the remaining sentences of the majority of former burghers convicted of military offenses during the late war.
Fire of unknown origin destroyed the Atlantic Window Glass company plant at Magnolia New Jersey, causing about $60,000 in losses. It was described as the second largest glass works in the United States.
President Roosevelt completed a busy day on his Illinois trip delivering nine speeches from Freeport to Bloomington Ul yesterday. Eight talks were outdoors and several were in rain, marking the most active speechmaking day of the tour.
Winona Minnesota June 6 The rafting works at West Newton have closed due to high water but will reopen when the river subsides Sixty million feet of logs have been rafted this season A separate note from Stewartville Minnesota June 6 announces a special election on June 12 to bond two thousand dollars for replacing the dam on Root River to improve the public park
Sensible advice to women at life change period promotes Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound. Letter testimonials claim relief from dizziness, headaches, flashes, and back pains after six bottles. Includes a $5000 reward claim for genuineness with references to names and locations.
In an era of high pressure the article argues for recreation to preserve mental energy for original thought. Working brains fatigue after daily labor and attempting evening literary work leads to diminishing demand and waning reputation, making rest essential for sustained creativity.
Adrian Minn June 11 Phili Doyle of this place says he found a medicine that cures kidney trouble. He was long sick but is now well after using Dodd's Kidney Pills. He calls them wonderful and the best medicine he has taken and reports being completely cured after about ten boxes. He recommends them to others with kidney trouble.
A brief Philadelphia Press snippet notes a traveler saying New York is costly to stay in yet easy to be brief. The exchange captures a witty contrast about city life and travel.
Your feet ache and burn. Shake into your shoes with Allen's Foot Base powder. It cools and dries, easing swollen hot and sweating feet bunions. Sold at druggists and shoe stores 25c. Free sample by mail from Allen S. Olmsted, LeRoy, N. Y.
A California fruit grower describes a novel plowing technique using downward dynamite charges to break soil. The process, claimed to be cheaper and faster, involves firing charges to fracture ground rather than traditional tillage methods. No further verifiable details are provided.
A fragmentary report describes a boy Willie allegedly riding a goat through a house as his mother returns from shopping. The piece references a Bunker boss dare, a stair adventure, and a chaotic scene ending with a mention of a dentist diagnosing or addressing injuries.
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