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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Jul 27, 1900
Page
3
Theodore Tibbs is noted for wearing vivid shirts with awning stripe patterns in a witty remark from the Indianapolis Journal. The item highlights color and style in a playful social note.
An old advertisement extols Hood's Sarsaparilla as the great blood maker that cures tiredness pimples sores scrofula and catarrh. It urges readers to take the medicine daily and see blood health improve quickly claiming it as America’s greatest blood medicine.
An actor touring Ireland frames the push for home rule through a Dublin hotel waiter who jokes the only path to autonomy is a combined continental alliance to “give those black gairds of English a rare good hiding.” He smiles slyly, then credits Britain’s grand navy for keeping order.
Mrs Yourdeal teases Mr Yourdeal at breakfast about a dream in which he praised tapiom pudding. The pair exchange light humor as he recalls being a natural-born liar, exposing a playful scene at home.
T M Roberts Supply of Minneapolis announces a low price on binding twine that undercuts the state prison sale, claiming a new maker’s price allows a small savings. They urge immediate orders, promising to pass savings to customers and noting the twine is new and bright.
A Somerville man hunting gray squirrels in New Hampshire last fall was told by a local companion that squirrels are not his size and he should go hunt elephants instead. The remark, recorded by the Somerville Journal, frames a humorous regional quip about overreaching ambitions.
An old ad promotes Allen's Foot-Ease powder to shake into shoes for swollen, smarting feet and bunions. It notes 25c at druggists and shoe stores with a free sample offer. A cartoonish aside references canaries and a stray joke about a man turning from evil companions.
An old style notice touts Mrs Pinkham’s advice for women’s health with claims of curing sick women coast to coast and inviting letters for guidance. It gives an address in Lyans, Massachusetts, urging readers to write for help.
No 23 team Fiso Cure FC faced an unexpected setback in a late season match as 2G Git 7 delivered a tight defensive display. The contest highlighted discipline from Fiso Cure FC and strategic pressure from Git 7, shaping a crucial point in the standings.
Washington June 3 The first session of the Fifty sixth congress is practically closed with a busy six months. The work includes Porto Rico and Hawaii governance, the gold standard act, canal and anti trust debates, New Cuba and Philippine measures, and numerous appropriations. Treaties with Great Britain and Germany ratified, Samoa tripartite government ended, and tariff and civil service changes enacted. The session advances Nicaragua canal, Pacific cable, and Alaska code while expanding pensions and homestead laws.
A Philadelphia North American item quotes a man saying he lacks the price to buy a horse and the owner interrupts. The industrial commission plans hearings this month with witnesses on agriculture horticulture general labor conditions in the South and compulsory arbitration.
A dialogue features Tommy and his father discussing why the Dead Sea is not buried, with Mr Treadway limiting questions to one more today. The exchange hints at a riddle tone and curious, playful curiosity in a family setting.
A Chicago News feature quotes Cholly and Daisy trading terse lines about internal thoughts and perceptions. Daisy frames Cholly as a freak while asserting common disbelief in others’ private musings.
Mr. Pitt asks Mr. Penn about waking time on Fifth Avenue. Penn replies he didn't get up because he slept in an upper berth after traveling from Philadelphia. The quip captures a humorous exchange reported by the Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph.
East Orange New Jersey records the death of Rev. John C. Lowrie D D a leading Presbyterian church worker who had been confined to his bed only a few days.
Indiana newspaper notes that she-people rarely marry their fae loves, perhaps only once, suggesting a rule about unions with magical beings and limited unions among such couples.
A remark from Harper's Bazar notes Shrinkeby as very reserved and discreet. The quote suggests he could endure a toothache unseen, highlighting a skeptical view of his openness.
On the first and third Tuesdays of June July and August the Chicago and Eastern Illinois Railroad offers Homeseekers Excursion tickets to Alabama Arkansas Florida Georgia Indian Territory Kentucky Louisiana Mississippi Missouri North Carolina South Carolina Tennessee Texas One fare plus 2.00 for the round trip Tickets good up to fifteen days outbound with stopover in Homeseekers territory and twenty one days return A new wide vestibule train runs daily from Chicago to Waco and Fort Worth Texas with through Pullman sleeping cars and free reclining chair cars For details contact any C E I agent or C L Stone G P and T A Chicago
Last year the City of New Mexico reported a death rate near 44 per 1000, similar to Bombay. Authorities expect a new drainage system opening to reduce the rate by about half.
A gentleman pleads for help finding legitimate work and reveals he is a calamity howler. The judge, in a terse exchange, questions the man's business and the woman offers a cautious possibility of assistance.
List of patents issued to Northwestern inventors includes Charles Gristadore of St. Paul for a 90x pressing machine Jacob Daunz Sr of St Paul for a pail Albert J Keck of St Paul for a magazine pencil flenry Keller of Sauk Center for a thresher Darius Payne of Minneapolis for a salter Joseph Perrin of Lordsburg NC for a cultivator Millard F Potter and H J Minar of Austin for a wheelbarrow Ed Skaar of Kenyon for an automatic wagon brake Merwin Leth Johnson patent attorneys 011 012 Pioneer Press Bidg St Paul
A Cleveland Plain Dealer quip notes a boy who reads about the Senator Clark bribery case and proclaims he will grow up to be a state legislator. The remark underscores curiosity about political corruption and future public service.
A sensational cure claim states SYTS reemenenty cured with Dr Kaine's Great Nerve Restorer. No fits or nervousness after the first day’s use. Offers a free trial bottle and treatise for $2.00 from B A Kane at 431 Arch Street Philadelphia. A stray joke about insurance follows.
A column mocks an old question of heredity versus environment with quips about wealth and provincial chickens. The piece includes a blackface joke and a line about a goat taking life easy, ending with a sharp, ironic tone.
A Norfolk poulterer tells a schoolmaster of fresh turkeys at all prices. The master selects four of the toughest birds, then declares he will take the remaining eight for his boys, aiming for a less tender treat.
Sears Rornick & Co offers cut out notice for binder twine in Sisal Standard or Manila. Mail quantity and desired delivery to Binder Twine Department Chicago to receive a quoted price aiming to secure the order or force lower prices from suppliers.
A Washington Star excerpt features Meandering Mike asking a lady permission to chop wood in her yard for exercise. He claims pride prevents him from using her yard for free, arguing the woodchopping would be good for him and that he should pay something for the use of the space.
Do Your Feet Ache and Eueral Shake into your shoes Allen's Foot-Ease a powder for the feet. It makes tight or New Shoes feel Easy. Cures Corns Bunions Swollen Hot and Sweating Feet. At all Druggists and Shoe Stores 25c Sample sent FREE Address Allen 8 Olmsted LeRoy N.
Miss Swelltop explains Miss Swelltop cannot attend the opera due to a nervous throat condition. Miss Bluegore queries illness. Swelltop confirms she is not truly ill but cannot speak above a whisper.
A Chicago Tribune snippet jokes about a teary wife greeting her parrot complaining of trouble the bird won t disclose and swears. A Boston Globe item warns Bennie to avoid measles at Harry Gilpin s but Bennie brushes off the risk with a quip about never spreading illness.
A brief reader notice mentions sending for Choice Recipes from Walter Baker and Co of Massachusetts mailed free. The accompanying excerpt cites a political figure denying contact with his wife for information and claiming it was someone else. The Chicago Tribune quote underscores a deflection about a wife’s remarks.
Marie Corelli appears settled in Stratford-on-Avon conducting most correspondence via secretary and typewriter. She has a new novel and several shorts, gives public talks, and plans to popularize Shakespeare for children. She becomes president of the Walsall Therapy Institute, a post once held by Sir Arthur Sullivan and Sir Henry Irving.
A May Ladies' Home Journal excerpt by Margaret Be. Sangster warns against retiring too early and praises young women for energy and pluck. It argues mature judgment is still vital in teaching, art, housekeeping, and leadership, urging women to serve actively rather than rust out.
A physician warns that pantry placement and conditions in homes create food poisoning risks. Poor light ventilation damp walls and improper water tap drainage foster filth and soil contamination, with defective yard pavement enabling microbial growth and increased virulence. Cincinnati Enquirer reports.
Johnny Noon recalled a trip to Charleston West Virginia noting the state seal bears the motto Mountaineers are always free. He compared this to the penitentary entrance while describing the irony of seeing many mountain men in stripes inside the facility.
Ball's Catarrh Cure is advertised as a constitutional remedy. The brief notice notes price and terms but offers no further details on ingredients or efficacy.
A dialogue notes that a girl cannot imagine anything worse than a kiss against her will while a man counters that it would be worse if a woman refused a kiss when the man is willing. The exchange mirrors a moral debate from the Catholic Standard and Times.
A playful piece discusses rising in America and the middle class’s duties with wealth. It urges readers to study advertisements for bargains and mentions a caricatured exchange about a piano recital with humorous dialogue.
U. S. Senator from Mississippi V Sullivan writes from Oxford praising Peruna for catarrh relief. He says the remedy improved his health and served as a tonic. He recommends Peruna as the best catarrh cure, urging readers to obtain the free book from The Peruna Medicine Co. Columbus, Ohio.
Dr J H Mindlaure of Fargo announces he is preparing an impromptu speech for Senator Clarion to deliver at the banquet tomorrow night. He remains at his desk late as he works on the remarks.
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