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This newspaper page contains 33 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Jan 12, 1900
Page
3
An elderly blind beggar on a town porch cries as a compassionate woman asks about his troubles. He explains a tenant reports water pipes in his best apartment have burst, revealing a life of pursuit and hardship. The Detroit Free Press source is cited.
A colored citizen writes to the president asking that his son in the Philippines be granted furlough to return for Christmas. He pleads that his mammy is pining for his return and asks for the order to be sent quickly so the family can have a Christmas dinner. He promises to vote for the president next time.
A young Irishman applying for a conductor role in Scotland told the manager not to worry about his pay but to hire him, promising he would have his own car in two weeks. The anecdote illustrates his confident boast.
A testimonial from Mrs A Edwards of San Francisco dated February 9 1899 reports long use of Ayer's Hair Vigor with complete satisfaction and widespread encouragement of friends who also found it effective.
Talk about it that's always the way with our Hair Vigor. Users praise its effects and tell friends. It claims to satisfy when hair is short thin split or falling out and even restores dark color to aging or white hair.
A humorously phrased letter to a former employer from a brother, asking for a Christmas overcoat. The text imitates dialect, noting the speaker would preach from sundown if he had such a coat and urging Marie Tom to send the gift.
Readers are told Hall's Catarrh Cure can cure catarrh at all stages, a constitutional disease. The ad claims internal action on blood and mucous surfaces, offers 100 dollars for any uncured case, and asks readers to send for testimonials. Also promotes Hall's Family Pills.
London Tropical Times reports a street encounter where a beggar admits whisky fuels his decay while a gentleman reluctantly offers sixpence. The piece ties a moral note to poverty and drink, reflecting harsh urban life.
A compact selection of jokes and witty sayings gathered from the tide of humor. The piece blends original lines and chosen quips on gossip and rumor, with a tongue in cheek stance toward interviews and unnamed sources, reflecting a society wary of secondhand stories.
In a fragment from Unsere Gesellschaft a mother comforts Fritz as he worries about a photograph being taken. She reassures him nothing will hurt and it will only take a minute, while Fritz recalls past promises at the dentist.
In a Chicago Times Herald fragment a boy B obbie quips about his aunt, 36 and rich, noting her similarity to Dewey and that she has never run from a man. The aunt has returned home to save her will changed.
The hap py maiden Dora asks Alfred how he chose her as his future wife. He answers with a confident gush, crediting “man” for prompting the proposal as she rests her head on his shoulder and confides.
A Washington Star quip contrasts Beethoven with ragtime through a dialogue. A young man asks admiration for Beethoven while noting his era, and a young woman replies that Beethoven was fine for his day since rag time did not exist then.
An art critic scolds a portrait of multimillionaire Snag gins for not resembling him while a fashionable painter defends the $2,500 price, quipping about the value of likeness versus demand in Boston.
A witty Chicago Record note chronicles Mies Gig lamps planning winter outings. He jokes about choosing plays and concerts requiring someone to escort him, hinting at social plans and cultural events during the season.
In a humorous exchange from Heitere Welt a man laments the longing for a caring partner and proposes buying a dog as a solution. The woman counters with a witty suggestion about dog ownership.
A light exchange from Chicago humor notes Sandy Pikes explaining why his mouth is called the “fire” devouring element. The lady asks how he crams food in, and the reply highlights quick wit and playful banter.
A financier exults that a recent deal will be a feather in his cap while a Washington Star quote envisions “a whole bunch of feathers in my wife’s hat” marking the witty exchange on the property located deal.
Yabsley asks why a woman hates housework Wickwire replies many do not know how Indianapolis Journal quotes a playful domestic exchange.
Chicago section notes the new C C C line offering health benefits through Cascarets Candy Cathartic. Claims of quick relief from lazy liver and constipation, with advertising urging readers to buy 10c 26c or 50c boxes and to request a free booklet and sample.
Returning Twentieth Kansas veterans say pie rations would boost army life. Arthur Philips, Mulvane, Kansas, a former private in Company H, Tenth Pennsylvania, and W and J football standout, was greeted with a four by six foot pie baked at a reception in Washington Pennsylvania's opera house. The pie was laid out for the hero and he consumed it through the night, inspiring a humorous note from Leslie's Weekly.
Northwestern inventors received patents last week for a bag fastener, car coupling, curling tongs heater, horse collar, draft equalizer, runner for vehicles, steel ore bin, and feed board for roller mills. Listed filers include Peter M. Bang Dawson Minnesota and others. patent attorneys Merwin Loth & Johnson of St Paul. An Appreciative Comment from the Washington Star praises Blinx's bright boy.
A short dialogue snippet featuring Mr Hall and Mrs Skinner with light banter about reading the paper at table and taking mind off eating. The line notes the humorous tension between reading and dining and includes a playful exchange on hats.
John M. Smyth heads The John M. Smyth Co. built a world leading institution through years of hard work. His name is a Chicago household word and the firm's catalogue offers items to eat wear or use. An angler notes truth about others’ catches.
Mantua M Kine of Norra Attleboro Mass credits Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetable Compound with curing a year long illness. She reports relief from backache side pain stomach and bowels now well and urges other women to try the medicine.
Ensign Joe Powell who followed Hobson in the Merrimac voyage married Miss Bertha Allen Osterhout in Oswego New York. Both were raised there and the romance was widely discussed though denied by many friends. Powell, from the construction corps, plans a six month honeymoon in Glasgow before returning to Clyde duties.
Yale students create a legal bureau to challenge the Connecticut blue laws, amid stories of the era’s harsh rules. The 1656 code criminalized mince pies and Christmas celebration, limited music, restricted dress, and punished Sunday activity, with draconian fines and penalties. It notes officials like Gov Eaton and Rev Davenport as influential in enforcing the laws.
In Send Surrey the teetotal and moderate drinker sections of a sick benefit society report stark contrasts in finances. Abstainers earned no sick pay in twelve months while returning subscriptions of 1 pound 4 shillings 9 pence each. Moderate drinkers had 15 pounds 1 shilling 8 pence in sick pay with only 18 shillings per member available for benefits. The first death prompted a levy dispute with teetotalers losing a vote to avoid subsidies, risking the eventual dissolution of the abatamera section.
Perfumed butter draws shopper interest as a new fad with aroma enhancing spreads. Vendors tout novelty and potential culinary use amid growing curiosity and speculation about its appeal and price.
A Chicago Tribune quip recounts two speakers admiring a lounge and joking about a birthday present valued by the husband’s payment equal to the wife’s age. They compare it to their own home lounge bought for 38 dollars, noting the contrast in cost.
Billy paraphrases Wilde Wyman boasting that his father resembles Dewey and his grandfather resembles Dom Paul in a Chicago News item about local pride and family likeness among strong men.
A Detroit Free Press quip notes a local summer resorter’s remark about Michigan’s weather, joking that there are four seasons as a swing between summer and winter. The exchange highlights regional climate quirks and seasonal expectations.
Dramatic quips from a late night panel hint at a mistaken inebriation claim involving Mrs. Bludsoe and Col. Corkright. Maj. Bludsoe denies intoxication, stating not by a jugful, as reported by Puck.
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