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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Feb 10, 1899
Page
2
A collection of satirical gibes and observations from publisher D. R. Streeter at Williamsport North Dakota touching on vanity, truth, diplomacy, and medical microbes. It cites Dr Herz dental inoculant and critiques England's stance on tariffs the Philippines and China.
Four convicts walked out from the county jail in Eureka Springs Arkansas to attend a dance and returned the next morning demanding admission and breakfast. Authorities restored the inmates to their cells deeming a mild punishment fair while noting constitutional rights to food and shelter.
The Supreme Court sustains New York law requiring a license tax on foreign corporations doing business in the state. Judge Shiras states states may condition permits on taxes and that such licensing is not a discrimination against other states. The article also reflects on post election civic sentiment and political engagement.
A dense discourse on whether animals help others, noting humans’ benevolence and cruelty, with examples of wild species like rhinoceros birds and elephants, and domestic cases where pigs and cats aid or fail to aid peers, concluding that true cross species sympathy is rare and mainly limited to domesticated contexts.
The Ladies' Home Journal argues manual training teaches underlying principles rather than specific trades. It trains youths in carpentry, patternmaking, wood carving, blacksmithing, machine construction, and more, using practice models to develop broad skills and virtuous vocation.
Professor Benjamin the Wheeler argues that Alexander of Macedon created the Mediterranean civilization central to Europe’s past, with Rome later building on it. He notes Alexander halted his eastward push at Sutlej, leaving India and China to develop separately, while modern commercial greed threatens to erase ancient world divisions.
Coleridge shines in dialogue and wins listeners though an old lady doubted his patience with a self centered talk. Ben Jonson learned by listening and absorbing others humors. Shakespeare mirrored nature yet sometimes looked to his own reflection. Southey was austere and Lamb joked he seemed made for a monk but the cowl did not fit. Addison impressed intimates but fell silent with strangers.
A German biologist reports that human faces are not perfectly symmetric. In about two of every five people the eyes appear misaligned, and in several cases one eye is noticeably stronger than the other.
An archaic satirical exchange questions a wife’s right to expect much from her husband. A meek man replies that while a wife may expect loyalty, it becomes problematic if she demands more than a common man can give, hinted with ironic tones.
A fragment surveys unusual human traits and social flaws, listing examples such as a jealous-free lover, a disinterested man, and critical unanimous opinions from doctors, while contrasting with freethinking mothers and flawed authority figures. The text hints at hidden impulses and social judgments without full context.
A Vienna correspondent notes shifting Austro-Hungarian opinion after the Spanish American War. Americans move from “greedy money seekers” to a feared great power as Manila victory and Cervera’s destruction challenge prior doubts. The Neue Freie Presse essay mocks American poetry and praises German critics while linking Emerson and Goethe to American culture.
The London Shipping World reports 7 459 lives saved from wrecks of British and foreign vessels during 1896 97. Of these 2 799 were saved on UK coasts, 2 015 abroad, 1 618 from British vessels near foreign coasts, and 1 037 at sea. Rescue by rocket apparatus and shore forces accounted for 1 099 saves on the UK coast, while lifeboats and coastguard crafts saved hundreds. Abroad, most survivors relied on shipboard boats and passing ships.
The opera hood, stylish and practical, suits theater and concertgoers without carriages. Made of satin and fur, it covers the head and can be worn on the knee. Dames can craft their own hood with satin, fur, and chiffon scarfs in pale green or turquoise blue.
Massachusetts Governor Wolcott praised Colonel Roosevelt's Lowell Institute lectures saying the speaker both makes and writes history, noting there are men to do one but few who do both. He cited the lectures as noteworthy for their dual role.
A Sonora map trick leads a Phoenix syndicate to hunt a fabulously wealthy mine. They drill near Magdalena and instead uncover a graveyard of bones, forcing a rethink of the site while keeping faith a mine lies nearby. The tale ends with a quip about Willie as an impressionist.
The Ordnance and Fortification Board in Washington appropriated $25,000 for experiments on airships for reconnaissance and striking at the enemy. Professor Langley, whose flying machine work has drawn wide notice, advised the project and will assist General Greely in its conduct.
Each anchor weighs eight and a half tons and was tested to bear a strain of 120 tons. The combined weight of cables and anchors for the Campania was 105 tons. These anchors are claimed as the heaviest ever made.
A Philadelphia Times column humorously critiques shoppers and manners as Christmas buying begins. It notes shoplifters target new capes, domestic service terms jar, and women pose with gifts while purses attract grab attempts.
The article notes Porto Rico's bravery abolished in 1873 and scarce wildlife. It states stock raising prospers, the island as a European sanatorium, a east–west mountain range averaging 1500 feet, Porto Rico as cooler and fertile. Railways few now, with expected Cuban war end spark. The island is about 100 miles long and 40 miles wide with roughly 660,000 to 690,000 people of African descent.
A wartime-era notice warns that soldiers in Hawaii could contract leprosy and bring it home while promoting Hostetter's Stomach Bitters as a cure for stomach disorders malaria fever and ague. Sold at all drug stores.
The group jokes about whether fishes have brains. The presiding genius asks, a doctor Johnson figure ponders, and a scoffer quips that fish do not know enough to avoid nets, ending the inquiry in amused resignation.
In a Chicago department store a man was startled when a young clerk called him a cuss. A second clerk explained Sadie’s habit of abbreviating to mean customer, revealing the misheard insult was not malicious.
An anecdote in Modern Society tells of a Russian peasant who bought boots and drank spirits before sleeping by the roadside. A light fingered tramp steals the boots, and a passing wagoner shouts to move. The sleeper quips that his legs are not his as his boots are gone.
A letter to the editor appearing in Palermo papers is signed by Candino, a feared Sicilian brigand, announcing the expulsion of a robber named Globo for discourteous conduct. The letter closes with "kindest greetings of friendship." Paris Daily Messenger reports.
A Cleveland Plain Dealer note quotes an actor admitting that railway journeying causes him pain because the ties are too far apart. The exchange reveals a witty critique of rail travel and a humorous self disclosure.
An opposition manager sought material against a Mormon candidate by interviewing one of his wives. Asked if her husband treats all wives well, she replied a firm yes, adding that if he mistreats them relatives would not vote for him. Washington Star report.
A quip questions if football is played in the District of Columbia while Congress is in session. A reply notes it stops until session ends with a line about catching the speaker's eye. The Pittsburgh Chronicle Telegraph quotes the exchange in a wry mood.
A brief quip from the Cincinnati Enquirer about a back and forth on early mornings. The joke centers on an alarm clock waking the baby, the baby waking the wife, and the wife not hearing the baby, then waking the husband.
Gibbons instructs his aide to wait for the tailor, a terse exchange reflecting a bustling moment in Philadelphia. The terse dialogue captures a snapshot of daily life in the North American.
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