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Newspaper
Emmons County Record
Location
Linton, North Dakota, United States of America
Date
Dec 14, 1900
Page
3
A Washington-born woman living three years in a small Indiana town observes neighborly humor in a backyard egg episode. A twelve year old girl, perched on a fence, offers an egg for free and then asks to borrow a tack hammer, highlighting local tact and diplomacy.
Frank J. Zeller, chief of No. 143, Meadville, credits seven boxes of Dodd's Kidney Pills for a full recovery from four years of kidney trouble that kept him awake at night and unable to work. A fellow Brotherhood member, who had been cured, urged the treatment and provided the pills. Zeller praises the remedy and notes its availability from all dealers at 50 cents a box.
A traveling man confesses to Miss Florry in a village shop that thoughts of her kept him hopeful during dreary rounds and train waits. He compliments Miss Baxter and explains prices as Old Hanks returns to the back room, per London Tid-Bits.
A Chicago Times Herald excerpt features Mrs Parvenue arguing with a teacher over spelling for her daughter Janet. She claims spelling is below her daughter’s future wealth and social standing and argues she will hire a secretary to write letters rather than learn spelling.
Bakers and confectioners at Agricultural Hall plan a betrothal cake akin to wedding and christening cakes. The Bakers' Times warns vendors to guarantee the cake stays fresh for only a month and to test it as evidence against a truant lover.
A timid suitor finally speaks his case as the girl's father sternly questions his ability to support a family. The young man exclaims in shock at the idea of losing his job, reflecting a tense moment from the Standard and Times.
A quirky quotation discusses self-esteem as a universal bane when shown by others but a virtue when owned by oneself. The fragment hints at a playful reflection on ego and perception with an archaic sign-off.
Frank E. Everitt, a Chicago street faker, supports ten street boys in a three room flat on Thirty-fifth Street near State. The boys live as a self governed co operative community with school work, meals, and labor sharing, aiming for self sufficiency while Everitt acts as protector and guiding mentor. Two oldest members are ready to enter high school.
Dr. Harry Campbell argues the slum born and bred in London do not pass beyond the third generation and predicts racial extinction for the true Cockney. He blames crowded ill lit rooms and indoor work for degeneration while chorus of critics question the context and accuracy of the claim.
A dialogue panel shows Tom called lazy, he denies the label and insists he simply dislikes work, reflecting a lighthearted exchange from a Chicago Record page. The caption spotlights daily workplace humor and character.
A scientist suggests milk can extinguish kerosene fires by forming an emulsion that speeds extinguishing. The text promotes Hostetter's Stomach Bitters as a cure for constipation indigestion dyspepsia biliousness flatulence and also malaria fever and ague.
The exchange recalls a baby’s powerful cry that none of the grandparents ever heard matched, with a playful note about how the child’s howl outdid even their own recollections.
An old style health ad touts CAS CARETS as a cure for a range of ailments by restoring bowel health. It promises easy natural movements and costs 10 cents to start, warning against imitations and noting the metal box packaging and stamped C. C. C. on each tablet.
An 19th century advertisement claims deafness cannot be cured by local applications, arising from an inflamed Eustachian tube. It asserts catarrh as the cause and offers one hundred dollars for any deafness due to catarrh that Hall's Catarrh Cure cannot cure, directing readers to send for a circular from J. Cheney & Co. in Toledo.
A cartoon debate highlights differing canvassing methods with a caption about the next legislature. The dialogue notes that first citizens guess the outcome while second insists it will not blush. A separate tidbit compares a book agent and an awning man in neighborhood canvassing. Only children play ball while men run business.
The Bureau of Ethnology plans a forthcoming book on the Seri of Tiburon Island in the Gulf of California. Reports describe their remarkable height, stamina, and primitive Stone Age lifestyle with no use of cutting tools, tearing captured animals apart with hands and teeth for sustenance.
New tenement buildings in New York will offer private halls for each suite. Each unit features one living room that combines kitchen dining and sitting areas, with access to street or court. Tenants receive gas range and refrigerator, basement laundries with showers. Rent per room about $1 weekly.
The fragment notes that he was a member of the Parliament of 1289 90 and held roles within the period. The text indicates participation in governance during the late 13th century and situates him among the parliamentary body of that era.
A fragment notes Sir Herbert Maxwell of Carlavero ck traces line to a Parliament member dating to 1288 84 in Scone. It claims his ancestor sat in Parliament and pledged allegiance to Margaret of Norway if Alexander died, making a unique parliamentary lineage.
In Germany thirty nine waiter host associations were asked if fees lower wages. fourteen said yes while twenty five said no. The piece notes silver exports from the country to England rose 4,733,659 in eight months ending August and cites shipping to Hong Kong and rest of China with increases in shipments and value.
The average depth of Russian petroleum wells is a little over 900 feet. The chief obstacle encountered is salt water, similar to the water of the Caspian.
A writer visiting Anthony Hope at his rooms near Embankment Gardens exclaimed that Providence must have sent him. Hope replied with a twinkle that he hoped Providence would not acquire the habit of doing so.
In Central California fruit grows with ample water and a favorable climate. Five acres can sustain a family, ten acres can build a bank account. This year's harvest saw six acres of peaches yield 3000 dollars on the trees. Special excursion rates offered by Romer Agency at 460 Drake Block St. Paul Minnesota.
A fragment from the Indianapolis Journal notes Clara returns worse after a trip. The doctor cites self exhaustion from buying presents for the family as the cause.
Monroe Drug Co of Unionville Missouri offers a ten cent refund for every package of PUTNAM FACELESS DUES that fails to satisfy. The notice states the policy plainly and invites customers to request refunds.
A nurse explains to a doctor that the patient found the gas leak as he lies bandaged in bed, illustrating the danger and response pictured in the Chicago Tribune report.
Dr J H Rindlaub is listed as a specialist in eye ear nose and throat care based in Fargo North Dakota offering comprehensive ENT services.
A doctor informs Archie Pacer he has a tobacco heart. Pacer questions the claim, noting he never gave anyone a cigar in his life. The Chicago Tribune frames the remark as a light exchange in a broader medical tale.
A rural editor notes a clash between simple rural wisdom and the poet’s ambitions as youth hesitates to take a role. The piece contrasts straightforward local wit with artistic pretension in a light, observational tone.
The piece urges mothers to monitor their daughters during puberty and promotes Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound as aid. It cites Miss Good's 1899 letter from Seattle seeking guidance on irregular monthly periods, prolonged stoppage, and poor health.
A Philadelphia Record item notes Gibbsboro New Jersey resident Big John Gross, famed for extreme obesity, using a paddle and chasing flies to burn fat. His wife endorses the odd method, claiming steady weight loss as he leaps across rooms to kill flies, improving his condition one notch at a time.
Northwestern inventors receive patents including George Anderson of St Paul for rotary engine John Barber of St Paul for car truck Nathan Barnes of Minneapolis for bicycle Elias Cronstedt of St Paul for hydrant John Derus of Minneapolis for fire escape Emil Wagner of Aberdeen for rope pulley James Purcell of Winnipeg for bridle bit Edgar Bisbee of St Paul for old cake forming apparatus Lothrop and Johnson patent attorneys handle filings at 613 Pioneer Press Building St Paul Minn.
Perugia, the queen city of the Umbrian hills, holds a long feudal and artistic heritage. The mountain town, 1,800 feet above sea level, sits on a rocky acropolis with sections predating Rome. Foundations of walls date back over 3,000 years to the Etruscan race whose art preserves their memory.
The speaker asks Johnny-Paw to define the phrase and is told a man who "takes things easy" may be a philosopher a ko dak fiend or a kleptomaniac. The remarks appear in a Balti more American style exchange.
A comic exchange shows Uncle Jabez lamenting that Reuben is mocked for buying green goods while his wife approves, with Uncle Hiram asking how and Uncle Jabez replying that his wife does not.
Mrs Taos of Norwich writes that Tam sure Piso’s Cure for Consumption saved her life three years ago. A reader questions a death cause with a quip about heart failure, reflecting a Chicago Record exchange on medical cures.
A compact snippet mentions Ashington and a conversation about a friend. The line includes Teller exposing a brother-in-law and a satirical tone from Harper's Bazar. The text also advertises Mrs. Winstow's soothing Syrup for teething and colic in children.
In a sharp exchange, Wunn explains leaving the gas on full blast to deter a burglary. Tuther questions success, and Wunn concedes the plan backfired when the bill arrived, illustrating unintended consequences of extreme security measures.
A jumble of brief quotations and ad like lines from old newspapers. Includes a teacher student exchange about chemistry a maple syrup factory vow and a toyish cold cure joke. Also references to water intake laxative tablets ink and an organ grinder remark.
A humorous meditation on clocks and time keeping questions the need to cuff a timepiece for striking the hour. The piece blends whimsy with observations on rhythm and punishment.
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