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This newspaper page contains 12 articles. Subscribers can read the full text of each article.
Newspaper
Eagle Lake Headlight
Location
Eagle Lake, Texas, United States of America
Date
Jan 21, 1938
Page
2
A collage of jokes and quips with witty exchanges and misheard lines. Bits include classroom gags, social faux pas, silly questions, and humorous theft of dialogue. The humor ranges from domestic to public life, featuring punny setups and light social satire.
A humorous collection of fragmented jokes about death, chickens, schoolchildren named after zodiac signs, a misheard doctor patient exchange, and a crooked prescription. The pieces read like stray punchlines from a bygone newspaper comedy page with cartoony logic and wordplay.
A Yoakum Herald item warns drivers that drinking impairs operation of vehicles on highways. It states law enforcement aims to curb drunk driving and highlights the danger to all on the road, urging readers to avoid driving after drinking.
In this reminiscence the author recalls loco or locoweed, a Western weed that poisons cattle and horses. He describes its fernlike plant, green year round, the wreckage it causes to nervous systems, and how ranchers long fought it by uprooting and burning. He recounts horses driven mad, one mare killed by barbed wire, and warns that dope use among youths grows as a new menace.
The passage urges readers to heed warning against smoking, advising individuals to avoid smoking others’ packs and to shun the weed as a threat to nerves and the brain. It emphasizes human intellect and the duty to resist influence, presenting a moralizing plea about self-control and health.
Six con artists posing as charity collectors for a supposed Eastland orphanage targeted Texas towns. They advertised links to a West Virginia orphanage and operated near Dallas hotels. Local authorities, along with state welfare officials, urged residents to dismiss the group. Police ordered them to leave immediately.
two communications mailed to the Headlight this week appear to be good news items but are omitted because they are unsigned. the policy states no publication without a signed author and names are not printed with the stories, though the writer’s name is known to editors.
A wary business note warns that selling a SUBSTITUTE for 668 to gain a few cents is dangerous for customers and the business. The message claims 666 yields triple to quadruple the value of 8 SUBSTITUTE, urging caution in pricing and customer relations.
A Palacios report notes a Believe It or Not moment when a baby’s ring was discovered inside an opened oyster. Hurtle Sullivan of Crawford Packing Co. found the ring while white grading oysters at the sheds prepared for market. The ring, once a pretty piece, had tarnish and pearl-like buildup.
A cryptic note from Palacios mentions Bea and her son, describing an oyster that appears daily but inexplicably drifts into a ring, leaving readers puzzled about the location and meaning behind the strange refrain.
R D Smith evangelist leads Church of Christ services at the Cole Theatre on the second and fourth Sundays with Bible study at 10 and morning sermon at 10 45 followed by preaching and communion services closing by 11 45. Roger Killough spent a UT weekend visit with his father R Killough.
An old advertising note promotes Creomulsion as a remedy for bronchial irritation from colds. It claims Creosote helps soothe inflamed mucous membranes, loosen phlegm, and expel germs, with a money back guarantee if relief is not seen.
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